I wasn’t sure if I was flattered that he noticed the changes, or slightly weirded out that he cared enough to try and notice. Deciding that I was flattered I laughed and gave him a smile.
“I’m sure there will be a lot more changes before this is said and done,” thinking about the changes to my body and that it would never be the same again, I pondered for a moment if he’d be okay with that. I’ve heard some women say that their partners could never look at them the same again. I wasn’t worried about stretch marks or my body changing or even the weight gain, but I did worry that he wouldn’t see me as a sexy, hot woman anymore once I became a mother.
“What’s wrong Lara, you have a deer in head look lights on your face?” Rupert said down his tea cup and stared at me.
“I was just wondering if you’d still want me after the baby. When my body’s changed, I’ve changed.” I whispered to him and felt kind of stupid even saying it out loud.
“That body is a pretty amazing thing, and I’d expect it to change, I also think it’s growing my child, which is a pretty miraculous thing for it to do. I can’t promise I won’t worry about things and we may have to work things out along the way, but you’ll always be beautiful to me Lara. As long as we keep communication open, we’ll be okay, alright?” Rupert told me honestly. “Right now, the baby’s so tiny it’s not quite real to me yet, but eventually, you’ll have a big belly we have to work around. I will worry I’ll break you, I’ve had thoughts too on how to make it work as this progresses. But once the baby’s out? You are fair game again. I won’t worry about breaking you.”
“Well, at least your honest,” I said laughing. The image of him fucking me from behind, with a belly had me wondering what sex would be like when I was largely round and pregnant. I guess something to look forward too, right now, it felt pretty great. I wondered if it would still feel like that in a few months.
“I am happy Lara, thank you.” Rupert told me and rubbed my hand across the table for a minute. Checking his watch, he gave me an apologetic look. I was coming to see his work face. He always seemed reluctant to leave me, but he took his obligations seriously, and it was one of the things that I loved about him.
“I’ll see you tonight?” I asked him.
“I actually am going on a business trip with my father. He just informed me of it last night, I forgot to mention it. Your mother is handling the rest of the wedding plans, I’ll be back in time for the wedding, so you take things easy and enjoy yourself for the next couple weeks. No pressure. Oh, and your doctor’s office called and scheduled your first appointment right before the wedding. I’d like to be there for that one, they told me they’d be giving you an ultrasound, so we can see the baby together.” Rupert walked around the table and hugged me. He pressed a kiss to my temple and squeezed my shoulder.
“Be safe, and hurry back,” I nodded at him. I watched him leave and I realized that I would miss him. The more time I spent with him, the more I was coming to rely on having him be a part of my life. I sometimes found myself waking up in my sleep reaching for him when he wasn’t there. I wondered if I’d sleep at all over the next few weeks.
Chapter 4
“Mum he’s late. He wanted to go to the doctors with us, why isn’t he here?” I said and texted him again. I knew he’d been on a plane earlier, and I haven’t heard from him since. I wasn’t thinking anything bad happened, but I just didn’t understand where he was.
I smiled sardonically to myself as I thought about everything else I’d thought about lately, like if I’d be able to sleep if he was gone. The pregnancy had me so tired, I was barely able to stay awake under the best conditions. Having to cut back on caffeine to one cup a day wasn’t helping. I never realized how much caffeine I drank in my tea, until they’d switched me to a no caffeine one.
My mother had insisted that I follow nutrition guidelines and she’d been a stickler the last couple weeks. She told me I had to keep her grandbaby safe. I was trying hard to be patient and indulge my mother, but right now she was so over the top on over protecting every little decision I made, I felt a little smothered. It probably wouldn’t have been so annoying had Rupert been here to keep me busy at night, but without him to balance out the rest of what was going on, I was a little ready to run away from everyone. I was tired of being fussed over.
I headed out to my doctor’s appointment and invited my mother when I couldn’t get ahold of Rupert. I knew she’d like to see her grandchild too, and if Rupert couldn’t get there, I didn’t want to be alone if I didn’t get good news. Yeah, I was realistic. I knew the odds were good things were fine, but what if it wasn’t?