“What? Now? It’s dark.”
“It’s barely dark and there’s a full moon coming up. Come for a run with me. You’ll be exhausted and you’ll sleep better.”
“I don’t have any trouble sleeping,” she grumbled, but she stood as she spoke and followed him down the two stairs to the front of the house. “Where are we going?”
“To the main road and back. It’s barely three miles. You up to it?”
“I have no idea. I’ve never been much of a runner.”
“I’ll go easy on you.”
“Like I’ll believe that.”
She didn’t like that it was dark. There might be a moon but it wasn’t like the sun as far as illuminating the world around her. Everything was blurry and menacing. But then she remembered Rita’s words about taking life one scary dark place at a time and moved next to Nick.
He jogged silently at first, setting a pace that challenged her without being impossible. They were in the center of the paved road that passed as a driveway. It was wide and relatively flat.
“Is Aaron already gone?” she asked. “I’m not in the mood to get run over by a man eager to be on his date.”
“He left a while ago.”
She nodded.
He’d left without trying to find her. Without saying he was sorry. She told herself their fight wasn’t important, but was the larger message that she wasn’t significant to anyone here?
“Focus on your breathing,” Nick said. “Feel it moving in and out of your body. Steady breaths. Match it with the sound of your feet and the way your body feels with each step. The energy flows through you. Every beat of your heart makes you stronger. Can you see the moonlight at all?”
She squinted at the sky. “Maybe. A little.”
“The glow is there, even if you can’t see it. The moon moves, goes through its cycle, regardless of what we do here on Earth.”
“Why are you talking like this?” she asked.
“Because it’s what you need to hear.”
“I gotta tell you, this is a little Zen for me. I’m not especially spiritual.”
“Maybe that’s the problem.”
“Do you want me to hit you? Because I can. I’ve been working out. I can hit you really, really hard.”
“If you can catch me.”
Who was this guy?
“Did you fall and hit your head?” she asked. “Do you need to see a doctor?”
“I’m showing you there’s another side of life. There’s a pattern to all that happens. You’re a single part of a greater whole. At the same time, you are the greater whole all on your own.”
She slowed, then stopped. “Now you’re freaking me out.”
He stopped in front of her. “What are you most afraid of in the world?”
That was easy. “The dark.”
“There’s no moon tonight, Izzy. Even you would be able to see it. It’s completely dark and yet you weren’t afraid.”
She shoved him as hard as she could. It was like trying to push down a house. “What? You lied to me? That’s really nice. Because I wasn’t already having a bad enough day?”
“You have it within you to be anything you want. You have the power. You always have. You’re not afraid of the dark. It’s not a wild animal that can hurt you. What you’re really afraid of is how you’ll deal with being in the dark. What you fear is yourself.”
She glared at his blurry shape, then pushed past him and headed back toward the house. “I liked you a lot better when you were just a guy.”
He followed her, staying behind her, but always close enough for her to hear his steps. Probably a deliberate act, she thought, furious with him for misleading her and herself for falling for it.
She wanted to scream at him that she was tired of the games. She just wanted to go home. Except where was home? Not Glory’s Gate. Even if she wanted to go back there, which she didn’t, Jed wouldn’t let her. So what was left? Living with Lexi and Cruz? Talk about three’s a crowd. She could get her own apartment. Except how would she get around? How would she buy groceries and find a job and support herself?
Maybe Skye would change the trust she’d created for Izzy out of her inheritance, allowing Izzy access to the money now. Only then what? She would be a semi-wealthy blind woman living in an apartment she couldn’t leave? What was she going to do with her life?
Suddenly it wasn’t the dark she wanted to escape, it was the uncertainty. She started to run again, only faster this time. She ran and ran until she saw the house in front of her. She dashed inside and took the stairs as quickly as she could. She raced into her bedroom and shut the door. Then she carefully turned on all the lights.