Straddling the Line(90)
He shook his head. “I’m going to bed.”
He tossed the empty beer bottle in the bin and headed up the stairs, intending to lock himself in his room, cowardly avoiding a confrontation with Haven. But she hurried in front of him on the stairs, blocking him.
“I’m not going to let you do this, Trevor. Talk to me.”
“I don’t have anything to say.”
“Don’t avoid me. Don’t avoid this.”
“There’s nothing to avoid. I’m pissed you went behind my back and scheduled something you shouldn’t have. It’s as simple as that.”
“No, it’s not that simple. You’re afraid. I can see it in your face. Now tell me what’s going on, because I’m not going to let this drop.”
They stood on the landing, right in front of her bedroom. He could push her out of the way and he sure as hell could outrun her. And yeah, he could hide in his room, but she’d still be there in the morning, asking the same goddamn questions.
“Leave it alone, Haven.”
She grasped his hand. “I’m worried about you, Trevor. I’ve never seen you so upset. Please talk to me. Come to my room and talk to me.”
She tugged on his hand, but he refused to yield.
If he told her, it would change everything.
No one knew. Brad knew, but he had to know. His agent knew as well.
They were the only ones.
Besides his parents, of course. And Zane.
But he’d never told anyone. Deliberately, he’d never told anyone.
His throat felt like it was closing up. It was hard to swallow. His heart pounded against his rib cage. He couldn’t do this.
“Trevor. Why can’t you do the literacy event?”
He could barely feel her squeezing his hand as he finally blurted out the words he’d sworn he’d never say to anyone else.
“Because I can’t goddamn read.”
THIRTY-ONE
HAVEN’S BREATH CAUGHT. IT WAS AS IF TIME HAD stood still for those few seconds after Trevor had told her he couldn’t read.
“What?”
His shoulders slumped, the words barely audible. “Don’t make me say it again.”
She saw the pain etched into his features, the agony it must have cost him to admit that. “You can’t read? That’s impossible. I tutored you in college.”
He finally sat on the stairs. Slumped in defeat was more like it, as if a balloon had burst. He had no fight left in him.
And she’d made him admit it. She felt awful.
She kneeled in front of him and said it again. “I tutored you. In English. History. Math.”
“Easy enough to fake it. You did all the work. And I can read some. Just not good. I get confused. So I just . . . don’t.”
Oh, God. Tears pricked her eyes. She hadn’t even noticed. She’d been so focused on her crush on him, on her irritation with him being the hotshot athlete who’d wanted to bargain with her to help him pass his classes, she hadn’t paid attention to why he’d been struggling so much.
She’d thought he was lazy. Her stomach tightened as the guilt poured over her.
She laid her hands on his knees. “How bad is it?”
“Bad.”
Then it hit her. The ridiculous organization in his refrigerator, the fact he hadn’t read the contract his lawyer had brought him. She’d never actually seen him read anything. He played some games on his phone, but that day he’d made her punch in a phone number on hers.
It was starting to click.
“What about your playbook? I know football players have to learn a playbook.”
“My agent and my lawyer know. They helped me through it, taught it to me play by play. Besides, there are pictures in the playbook. Fewer words. It’s easier to understand.”
For a brief moment, she closed her eyes, then reopened them. “That’s why you chose the literacy group as one of your charities.”
“Yeah. But I can’t read to those kids. I can’t let people find out about this.”
“You can be taught to read, Trevor. I can help you.”
He stood and started backing up the stairs. “No. Oh, fuck no. It’s too late for me.”
She stood, too, looked up at him. “It’s not too late for you. It’s never too late. You can’t give up on yourself.”
“Look. It’s bad enough that you know. I don’t want anyone else to know, and I hope you know this is off the record. If you try to put this in your interview, I’ll sue both you personally and the network.”
She gasped, horrified he’d think that of her. “Do you really think I’d use something as personal as this to get ahead in my job?”
He shrugged. “I don’t know, Haven. Would you?”