‘Any other requirements?’ I asked, as sourly as possible. But I was hard-pressed to keep a grin off my face. ‘Should she have a tiny waist? Or two noses, perhaps?’
‘Well, one that isn’t over eighty would probably have a greater chance of engaging his affections.’
Against my will, my lips twitched.
‘What about her?’ He pointed to another young lady.
‘She has a face like a horse.’
‘So does Flip. They should suit each other admirably.’
‘In case you hadn’t noticed, Captain Carter, ugly men are no less fond of pretty girls than others.’
‘True,’ he sighed. ‘What a shallow sex we are. Now… what about her?’
‘She looks nice enough, there is only one problem.’
‘Which is?’
‘The ring on her finger. She’s married.’
Captain Carter waved a hand, dismissively. ‘We don't need to tell Flip that. He’s short-sighted, he probably wouldn’t notice.’
‘Captain!’
‘Besides, we don't need her for long. We would only borrow her for one night. I’m sure she wouldn’t mind.’
I hadn’t thought there existed a man in England who could shock me. I had been wrong.
‘Her husband might,’ I pointed out, drily.
The Captain nodded earnestly. ‘I bow to your superior knowledge of men, Miss Linton. So… on to the next one.’
‘What about her?’ I said, feeling a silly grin appear on my face. ‘The one with the perky nose and big hoop skirt?’
‘I don't think so. She looks rather like a fat woodpecker.’
‘Hmm… maybe. And the one on her left?’
‘She would be perfect,’ Captain Carter admitted. ‘Only, Flip already fell in love with her two months ago, and I’m not quite sure he has forgotten yet.’
‘You talk about falling in love as other people would about a visit to the hairdresser!’
‘Not quite. Flip has his hair cut about once every fortnight, but he usually manages to fall in and out of love once a week.’
‘Um… then maybe the most intelligent approach would be to first exclude all the ladies he has already fallen in love with once?’
‘You’re quite right!’ His face lit up. ‘How clever of you, I would never have thought of that. Well, let me think… there’s Miss Alden, Miss Cokes, Miss Howard, Lady Darwin, Lady Caroline…’
‘Lady Caroline? She’s at least seventy years old!’
‘Yes, he fell in love with the back of her head and changed his mind when she turned around.’
I squinted at him suspiciously.
‘Are you making half of this up?’
‘What do you think of me, Miss Linton,’ he said with grave propriety. ‘That I would joke when such serious matters are at stake?’
‘Yes.’
‘Marvellous. You already know me so well.’
Whipping out my fan, I gave him a sharp jab into the ribs. He flinched in a very gratifying way.
‘Be serious, Captain! My sister’s welfare is at stake here!’
Rubbing his ribs, he gave me a smile. His smile was quite charming, particularly with that perky little spot of beard at the bottom of his strong face, which made him look like a trickster out of some old northern legend.
‘For you, I shall do my best to be serious, Miss Linton. Though I can’t promise anything.’
‘Very well.’ Content, I turned to the crowd again and pointed with my fan. ‘What about her?’
*~*~**~*~*
‘Flip! There you are, my dear fellow!’
At the sound of Captain Carter’s voice, Sir Philip turned around. ‘Carter!’ he exclaimed. ‘I’ve been looking for you, to…’
His voice trailed off, as he saw who was standing beside Captain Carter.
The Captain nodded to the rather confused-looking blonde lady who was standing beside him. ‘Philip, may I introduce you to Lady Katharine Rowntree? Lady Katharine? This is the man I said you simply had to meet, Sir Philip Wilkins.’
‘But you said you wanted to show me a painting from Lady Metcalf’s collec-’ the young lady began.
‘Anyway,’ Captain Carter said hurriedly, and loudly. ‘Now we’re all introduced. Isn’t that wonderful?’
‘Wonderful is hardly the word for it,’ Sir Philip breathed. He had an expression on his face I had seen only once before - when he had first beheld Ella at Lady Metcalf’s last ball. ‘Perfect would be more appropriate. Lady Katherine, would you do me the honour of the next dance?’
‘Oh… why, certainly, Sir Philip,’ she said, blinking in astonishment. ‘But… don't you already have a partner? Your companion…’ her eyes wandered to the place where Ella was standing. Ella opened her mouth reflexively.