I was to convince her, and then, if not, I was to steal her away.
I had a feeling it wasn't going to go over well at all.
Kathryn
I threaded my way through the sea of bodies and hazy mist of smoke in the little row house. The smell of marijuana, alcohol and shit I couldn't even identify was so suffocating that it was threatening my senses.
It was always like this. Every damn night. I couldn't remember a moment where I got any real peace in all of this shit. I couldn't sleep unless I was high or the music drowned out the noise.
Lately, I'd been high all the time, if not from my own pot, then from contact.
The days, now those were beautiful. Just me and my fiddle in the studio.
That's why I came out here. One of the best music collectives in the damn country. I thought I'd belong here. That it was a going to be a seamless transition.
But I was alone. Alone in a strange city with people who were more concerned with their high and their art than other people.
I was still invisible.
The cool night air hit me as soon as I emerged onto the back stoop. No one else out here, everyone was more concerned with the jam session going on in there.
It was my moment. So I did the thing I'd been aching to do all evening. I grabbed the joint out of my pocket and stuck it in my mouth, searching for my lighter. Fuck. I didn't want to go back in there.
I looked around the back stoop area, hoping someone left one around here.
"You need a light?" a deep silky voice asked from behind me. I turned to accept, my bottom lip sagging when I realized exactly who I was looking at.
Janson.
I should've known by the way his deep timber lit up all my senses, but it couldn't be. Not here. Still, his rock-hard form stood solid and real as he quirked a lip into a dirty smile. I shoved the joint back into my pocket.
I'd had a crush on the man ever since I was old enough to know what a crush was. It was silly, just a schoolgirl thing, following my big brother's best friend around. Dreaming he might feel the same way. I'd moved on from it as soon as high school hit, but it would always be there in the back of my mind.
Even when I was furious that my brother sent someone for me.
"What in the hell are you doing here?" I asked, more like hissed, as I took a step back from him.
I didn't need the joint. I already had a pretty good buzz going from all the pot smoke and the whiskey I'd been shooting. I tripped over my feet, and he reached out, catching me and pulling me to him.
"I came to get you," he said as he looked down at me, that chiseled jaw so close.
I could lean in. I could see what his stubble felt like on my lips. I could taste the salt on his skin.
But that would be wrong. He wouldn't like that. I wasn't that fucked up.
"So what, you just going to pick me up like a caveman and carry me out of here back to Baltimore?" That sucked all the fun right out of the night.
"Would you stick around if I did?" he asked.
Smart man.
"Fuck no."
"Didn't think so. I'm here to protect you, not kidnap you. Not yet, anyway." He released his hold on me, and my heart skipped a beat. I didn't want him to let go. It was the first time I'd been touched like that in forever. "I want you to come home with me."
"Home?"
"Back to my place, my cousin's place. Got a condo off the lake."
I should've guessed it would've been something fancy like that. Humboldt Park wasn't fancy, hell, it was halfway to being a fucking cesspool. It was the kind of place that people had been calling "up and coming" for a decade, but there was nothing "up" about it. It was a slum with hipster appeal. The kind that made me feel comfortable. I might've grown up in the suburbs in Severna Park, but I was an alien there. I'd always gravitated towards the grungy neighborhoods in Baltimore, and Humboldt fit that description here in Chicago.
But I was getting tired of the scene.
Maybe a fresh place and a shower would do me good.
A place that wasn't so filled with people, they were sleeping on the floors and in the broken down tub of the once-vacant tenement house.
"I'll go with you tonight, but I'm not coming home to Baltimore."
"I'll take that. For now." The way Janson said it, I had a feeling there was no choice in the matter anyway. If I had turned him down, he would've gone caveman on my ass.
Not like anyone would notice.
"Fine."
Janson
I gripped the steering wheel a little tighter, my fingers running along the threads of the stitched leather. I avoided Kathryn as soon as she hit eighteen. She'd always had a silly little crush on me, and as soon as she was old enough to be an option, I couldn't help but notice her.
She was gorgeous, and even in this unkempt state, I couldn't ignore it.
The way those jeans hugged that tight ass and her plaid shirt dipped down into her cleavage...
Fuck.
She was barely an adult. I couldn't think about her like this. It was wrong.
And yet my cock was getting rock hard as I tried to focus on the road. I didn't know the streets of Chicago like I did Baltimore, and I couldn't afford the distraction.
There were a lot of things I couldn't afford. We had a war brewing, and I should've been there helping. Not rounding up strays.
I was mad about the whole thing and that only made me hornier.
Fuck.
I had to get it out of my head. Get her out of my head.
So I just drove and tried not to even look at her. It was all I could do. I was fucking twisted.
Kathryn
I pulled my shoes off and hesitated. My socks were just as dirty, and under those, my feet wouldn’t be much better. I’d been living like a street rat for weeks. I needed a shower, and I knew it. Badly.
“I, um.” I hesitated as Janson turned to look at me. “I don’t think I can walk on these carpets; I’ll get them all dirty.”
He chuckled. “All right then. Let me carry you to the bathroom. You can get a shower, and I’ll root around and find some clean clothing.”
“What about my clothing?” I asked.
“I’m sure they have an incinerator around here somewhere,” he joked as he grabbed me and swooped me up into his arms. His big strong muscular arms. He acted like I was nothing. It would be a lie if I didn’t admit I’d dreamt of this moment more than once.
I just didn’t want to desperately need a bath when it happened.
He crinkled his nose but said nothing, and I was grateful. It was so damn embarrassing.
“That bad?” I asked.
“Smells like you lived in a cloud of pot smoke,” he admitted.
“I did.” A slow grin broke out over my face, and he walked through the hallway until he got to the bathroom where he set me down.
“Thanks,” I said, suddenly awkward.
We both were.
“I’ll go see if I can scrounge something up for you.” He ducked out of the room, and I turned and tried not to scream in mortification.
I never thought I would see any of the Fitzgerald crew again, let alone Janson Mactavish. I’d washed my hands of that reality. Of men like him.
I turned on the shower and started stripping off my clothing piece by piece. They were not in the best condition, at least that was what I thought, but I realized once they were off that he was right. They needed to be burned.
“Fuck,” I muttered as I stepped into the shower, the piping hot water bringing immediate relief. This was a nightmare. I’d come here with such high hopes, but really all I got was a steaming pile of disappointment.
The water beaded down my body as I moaned into the shower walls. It was heaven to feel that strong water cleansing away all the grime of that damn place.
“Kathryn?”
“Kat, call me Kat.” I hadn’t been Kathryn for years, at least not to anyone but my family.
“Kat, you decent?”
“I’m in the shower.” Thankfully, it was fogged up because he came in anyway.
“I brought you a nightgown and a stiff drink. Figured you might need one. I’ll leave it here on the cabinet.” I wanted him to linger, but he left. My heart returned to its normal pace. I hadn’t realized it had sped up.
I wanted him.
My body ached to be touched, to be held, and I knew the truth. I knew what I wanted. I’d spent my entire life letting anyone else, everyone else, tell me exactly what they wanted, and putting my own needs to the side.
Not anymore.
I was going to go after my desires.
I turned off the shower and stepped out of it, drying myself off before I grabbed the satin gown.
It was soft and sleek and I knew when I put it on that it would hug every single curve I had. I pulled it over my head and let it drape down me. It was a good fit. Not perfect, but good, and it hugged me in all the right places.
I grabbed the whiskey with one hand and opened the door with the other. I knew what I wanted, and I’d decided in the shower that there was no more time to waste.
I would have it.
I would have him.
Chapter Two
Kathryn
I walked into the living room to find Janson sitting on the couch that overlooked the lake. It really was breathtaking. So I sipped my drink and stared out over the landscape below. The city lights twinkled off the reflection in the lake, the cool wind blowing on the trees below us.
“It’s gorgeous.”
“Almost as nice as the Bay,” he said as he stood and walked towards the window.
“You have a penthouse like Greyson?” I asked, looking at him through the side of my eye.
“Yeah, something like that.” His eyes lingered over me and I felt myself blush. He was looking at me in a way I hadn’t seen before. Like he was seeing me as an adult for the first time. The deep hues of his green eyes flickered across my body and down me, then back up.