"We did it. On the roof. And then my parents came home. And then they told us about the baby." I groaned, letting it all fall out and not caring who was listening. "And then Flor just left and he was so angry, Addi. I'm not sure at who."
"Better not be you," she said, getting that voice on, the one that meant trouble. "I can't even … how did it happen?" I shook my head, unsure what to even say to that. How did it happen? Oh, I don't know, years of repressed hormones and a sexual tension so strong it could be cut with a butter knife?
Love.
I looked away and thought of Flor's face. He loved me, I could see that now. What I didn't understand was what that meant for us. Maybe nothing, probably nothing. If he'd felt that way all along then why should now be any different? If anything, this new baby thing was … a tragedy for our relationship.
"If … no, when River has this baby, you and Flor will be sort of … related by blood?" Addi asked as a question. I just sat there staring back at her and didn't know what to say. While a new baby didn't technically change the fact that Flor and I were completely and utterly unrelated to one another, it did complicate things even worse than before. A shared sibling. Someone we both called family that was genetically related to both of us. Ouch.
Theo MacFabulous sat down on the end of my bed and patted my foot sympathetically. I could tell from his face and from Addi's expression that this meant only one thing: doom. Flor and I were doomed. We'd been screwed from the start, but this was a whole new monster.
"Why don't we make today a girls' day out? I'm doing a private party, but I don't think they'd mind if you two showed up and pretended to be assistants or something. All I have to do is be the MC for some wealthy housewives and their backyard fashion show." He stood up and clapped his hands together. "Chop, chop, let's go. I won't take no for an answer."
I groaned and tried to roll over, but Theo yanked the covers off my bed like a magician.
"Don't you still live in Portland technically?" I grumbled, burying my face in a pillow. "Can't you go back there now?"
"I'm subletting an apartment from a friend, a friend who's implied that there may be a very lucrative position opening up in Springfield sometime soon, something perfectly suited to a dude in a dress. Besides, I never could walk away from a story with an uncertain ending. You and your stepbrother? Abigail, your drama is divine." Theo slapped me on the ass as I propped up and glared over my shoulder at him. He's prettier than I am, the jerk. How could a man look better in heels than even Addi did? The universe wasn't fair. "Pull your soggy sad sack butt out of bed and put on something skanky. If we do your make up just right, maybe the housewives will think you're a drag queen, too? It'll mean double the tips."
Theo snapped his fingers and left the room, the sound of his high heels echoing off the partially exposed brick wall to the right of my bed.
I turned onto my back and glanced over at Addi who was sitting quietly, staring down at her lap. One look at her face and it all came crashing down around me. Maybe Theo was right? I should get up and go to that party with him; he proved to be an invaluable distraction from reality.
"Are you okay, Abs? Really okay?" she asked me, turning her brown eyes on mine. "I know how long you've wanted this, how much you really … " She cleared her throat like the next words were hard to say. "How much you really love Florian. But this whole thing with your parents … it's a lot to take in."
I sat up slowly, like my body was made of lead and shrugged. What was there to say? That River's revelation couldn't have come at a worse time? That the look on Flor's face when he'd heard was terrifying?
"I'm okay," I said, but we both knew I didn't really mean it. Addi shook her head and stood up, putting her hands on her hips.
"Don't you lie to me, woman." She pointed a finger at me, painted with a bright splash of yellow, like a spring flower. "And don't lie to yourself either. If you're hurting, then hurt. And when he calls, tell him everything. You've waited too long to brush this under the rug."
Her mouth twitched.
"And as soon as you're feeling better, I want all the details. I mean, after all of this shit, was he worth the wait?" I rolled my eyes, knowing Addi would get the story out of me one way or another. She'd be irked to find that, yes, Satan made a delectable lover. A smile found my lips but was quickly leeched away, stolen by the memory of my stepmom's words. Flor, I'm pregnant. Your father and I are having a baby. "Don't answer that," she added quickly, noting my expression as I rubbed my hands down my face. "At least not yet. You can tell me later, over beer and ice cream. Don't knock the combo until you've tried it." She made herself smile at me as I untangled my legs from the sheets.
"Thanks, Addi."
I appreciated both her and Theo's attempts to cheer me up, but at this point, all I wanted to do was stay blank, check out for a while. The one thing I'd always wanted, I'd gotten. And then seen snatched away from me just as quick. If I thought I was bleeding before, cut deep by my feelings for Flor, I was positively wrecked now. A walking corpse.
I took a deep breath and forced myself up, but I couldn't make my body take a single step. Instead, my fingers found the locket dangling around my throat and I closed my eyes. When I opened them, I glanced down at the nightstand and my phone. No messages. Flor hadn't contacted me yet, but he would, right? All I had to do was wait.
"A party sounds good," I said and then proceeded to let Addi drag me off and dress me. Yes, a party sounded good; I didn't think I was capable of dealing with anything more serious just yet. Or ever. If Flor didn't come to me, I'd have to go to him.
My heart wouldn't have it any other way.
I went over to Flor's the next day after class, but I didn't see his car. I decided to knock anyway, since I could hear the sounds of a TV inside. Max's car was here, so I had just sort of assumed it was him until the front door opened and I found myself staring up at Rhonda.
She smiled at me and swiped some blonde hair behind her ear, stepping back and holding her arm out like she was inviting me in.
"Abi, nice to see you," she said as guilt swelled heavy in my throat. "Flor and Max are at the shop, but I'm making a stew if you want some." She waited for me to come in, but I just stood there staring at her, at her smile, her sweatpants and tank top. She looked comfortable, like she belonged here. I stared down at my feet and then back up, nodding because I didn't feel like I had the power to speak. I walked inside and stripped off my jacket; the house was a hell of a lot warmer than the winter chill outside.
I spied the kittens immediately and smiled. They were much bigger than the last time I'd seen them, scaling the sides of the laundry basket Flor had kept them in and waddling over to sniff at my feet.
"Congratulations," Rhonda said as I followed her into Flor's tiny little kitchen. The air was thick with the heavenly smell of a home cooked meal and despite myself, I felt my tummy grumbling. "On your new brother or sister, I mean." I felt my smile grind to a halt and an instant wave of dislike and resentment rolled over me. Rhonda didn't mean what she'd said as an insult, but to me it felt like one. That was not the person I wanted to be though, so I shook off the feeling and tried to school my expression into something more pleasant. Honestly, if we were counting points here, I deserved a negative score. I'd slept with this girl's boyfriend. I was the sister; I was supposed to be safe.
"Thanks," I whispered, realizing I still hadn't spoken a single word since I'd gotten here. "And nice to see you, too. Sorry, I'm still a little … I'm recovering from a sore throat." Rhonda nodded and smiled over her shoulder, her eyes big and round and framed with thick blonde lashes. She was just as pretty as Flor, much prettier than me. My stomach rumbled again, this time with the anxious feelings swirling around inside me.
"Well, it needs a little salt and pepper, but maybe this'll help. Here, try a bite and tell me what you think." Rhonda grabbed a clean spoon, scooped up some of her stew and handed it to me. It was delicious. Of course it was. Rhonda couldn't just be another floozy that Flor had picked up. She had to be different somehow, special. Pretty. Skinny. Nice boobs. Good cook.