I couldn’t help it. I edged in even closer and put my hand on the scruff on his face. “Really?”
“You’re really pretty, too.”
Dying to taste his mouth, I ran my fingertip across his lip ring. “I thought I was pretty ‘plain?’”
He shook his head slowly and caressed my cheek. He leaned into me, whispering softly over my lips. “No…just pretty.”
The need to kiss him was overwhelming. “Kiss me,” I sighed.
He continued to speak over my lips, his breathing labored. “It’s not that I don’t want to kiss you. I want that so fucking badly right now. But I just—”
I didn’t wait for him to finish. I took what I wanted, what I needed.
He moaned into my mouth when my lips covered his. He planted each of his hands on either side of my face. Without the hot sauce from our previous encounter, I was able to just taste him and knew immediately that there was no going back for me. I don’t know if it was my hormones or if the past several weeks were just major foreplay, but I felt completely out of control. The noises coming from the back of his throat made me even hungrier for him, and I caught them with my breath.
At one point, I rubbed my tongue gently around the cut on his lip as he closed his eyes. Then, he took over and started to kiss me harder, more demanding. I pushed my body into his and felt his erection press against me. I didn’t care about any of the consequences in that moment. I just knew I never wanted this to stop and shocked myself with what came out of my mouth next.
“I want you to show me how you fuck, Elec.”
He pulled away from me suddenly, looking stunned. “What did you just say?”
It was the most humiliating moment of my life.
His eyes widened, almost like he’d woken up from a dream. “Fuck. No…no. You need to understand something, Greta. That is never gonna happen.”
Okay, that was actually the most humiliating moment of my life.
“Why would you say that after everything you just told me?”
God, I felt so stupid.
He rested his head again on the headboard, looking almost tortured. “It was important to me that you know how much I want you and how beautiful I think you are—inside and out—because I feel like I’ve beaten down your self-esteem even though it wasn’t my intention. I meant everything I just said, but the kiss should not have happened. I shouldn’t even be in this fucking bed, but it just felt so good to lie here with you for a while.”
“How am I different from any of those other girls you give yourself to?”
He ran both hands through his hair, messing it up then looked at me with darkened eyes. “Actually, there’s a big difference. You’re the only girl in the entire world that’s forbidden, and fuck me if that doesn’t make me want you more than anything.”
CHAPTER 8
Nearly a month passed since that encounter in my bedroom.
Elec had left my bed that night shortly after he’d repeated that I was strictly off limits and that nothing could ever happen between us. It didn’t make sense to me that he could feel so strongly about it, considering we weren’t actually related. So, I felt that there had to be more to the story.
The worst part about what happened in my room was that Elec started to distance himself. There were no more rude texts, no more invites to play video games. When we were home at the same time, he stayed in his room, and I stayed in mine. He’d also been spending more time at the bike shop or out of the house.
I never thought I’d miss his insults and crude talk, but I would have given anything for things to at least go back to the way they were before I kissed him—and told him I wanted to fuck him.
Ugh.
I cringed whenever I thought about it. But in that moment, I was drunk off him and wanted to know what that felt like more than I’d ever wanted anything. I was ready.
Elec and I had both turned 18 in the weeks since that night. Our birthdays were just five days apart. So, I definitely felt old enough to take that step with someone. It wasn’t as if I were intentionally saving myself for marriage or anything. I was a virgin simply because I’d never wanted it with anyone before…until Elec. He’d spent the past few weeks making it crystal clear that it was never going to happen between us.
But I missed him.
Then, one night after dinner, the tides changed, and I got a little piece of him back. Normally, Elec never ate at home, but this particular Wednesday night, for some reason, he decided to join us. Ever since the night I saw how badly Randy treated him, I’d all but avoided my stepfather, except for sitting down with him at dinner. My mother and I were not really on the best terms either because she continued to insist that it wasn’t her place to get involved in Randy’s issues with Elec.