“Distract them?” I echoed, feeling like I was covered in cold mist. “How are you going to distract them from the alarm going off when the ankle bracelet leaves the house? There’s no way unless ... no!” I said too loudly. “Jackson, no! I know what you’re thinking.”
“Adeline,” he said calmly. His mind was made. “It’s the only way you’re going to get out of here. I love you. I always knew I would die here. I can’t think of a better reason than to die so you can live.”
“I don’t want you to die here,” I breathed. “There has to be another way!”’
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“I know how much girls go for at auctions,” he spoke. “And I’m guessing Nate put a pretty high price on you. You’re not going to be left alone. Someone will be here, making sure you don’t escape, making sure I don’t try to help you escape. Adeline, please. Please let me do this for you.”
My heart pounded, and my chest rapidly rose and fell as I gulped in air. The fact that Jackson was willing to die for me only made me love him more. My emotions surged, and suddenly all I wanted was to feel. I wanted to feel Jackson’s skin against mine. I wanted to feel his tongue in my mouth. I wanted to feel our bodies pressed together, naked and sweaty. I wanted to feel free.
In a flurry of passion, I pressed my lips to his. Immediately receptive to the kiss, Jackson slid his hands back to my waist. I tipped my head, running my fingers through his hair. I moved my mouth from his lips to his neck. Jackson let out a breath when I sucked at the skin on his neck.
I curled my fingers around the hem of his t-shirt and pulled it up. Jackson raised his arms over his head, and I removed his shirt. Carefully, I traced the ragged circle of scar tissue on his left bicep where the bullet had hit him. He cupped his fingers around my chin and gently tipped my head toward him.
And then we were kissing again. I leaned back onto the cot. Jackson moved on top of me, situating himself between my legs. I could feel his erection through his jeans, pressing against me and making my body ache for him, a feeling I hadn’t felt in so long. A feeling I wasn’t even sure I’d ever have again. But there it was, surging through my body. I wanted him as close as he could possibly be … physically and emotionally. I wanted to be together, to share something that could only be expressed in one way.
I moved my hands down, fingers settling on the button of his jeans, pulling it loose.
“Are you sure?” he whispered, his voice trembling.
“Yes,” I whispered back and pulled down the zipper. I pushed his pants down as far as I could reach. He sat up and kicked them off. Then he gently moved back onto me. I shook with nerves, feeling like it was my first time all over again. My heart pounded, but the love I felt for Jackson kept the fear away.
His rough hands slipped under the sweatshirt I was wearing. Slowly, he pulled it over my head. His dark eyes drank in the sight of my breasts, barely covered in purple lace. He nervously bit his lip and lowered himself back onto me.
His tongue entered my mouth after he removed my pants. I kept my eyes open, needing to see him, needing to know that it was Jackson who was on top of me with only the thin layers of our undergarments keeping us apart. It wasn’t hard to forget. He was gentle, careful. I could feel how much he loved me with each touch, each kiss.
Jackson kissed my neck again, slowly moving his hand down my stomach. I took a deep breath and let it out as he slipped his fingers inside my panties, reminding myself that I wanted this, that I wanted him. And only him.
But when he touched me, I panicked.
“Addie,” he said, moving off me so fast he fell off the cot. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he repeated. I grabbed the blanket and pulled it over me, feeling embarrassed and stupid. “Are you okay? Do you want me to leave?”
“No,” I said, heart still racing. “Please, no. I’m sorry.” I curled my legs up, shaking my head. “Just … just give me a minute.” I closed my eyes and focused on breathing, trying to steady myself. Jackson stayed at the foot of the cot, patiently waiting.
When I stopped shaking uncontrollably, I reached for him. “I want to try again.”
Jackson stood but didn’t move closer. “You don’t have to, Addie,” he said gently.#p#分页标题#e#
“I want to.”
He climbed back onto the cot and laid down next to me, spooning his body around mine. “We will take it slow, as slow as you need,” he whispered and put his hand on my hip.
I tensed, waiting for a flashback. When it didn’t come, I closed my eyes and relaxed against Jackson. “I think I’m more scared of the possibility of having a flashback than I am about having sex,” I admitted.