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Stay(112)

By:Emily Goodwin


My legs were shaking when I stuck the clear plastic cap over the pee-soaked end. The paper said to wait three minutes. I closed my eyes and started counting. I made it twelve seconds. The blue control line popped up right away. I brought the test close to my face and squinted, examining the spot where the second line would appear.#p#分页标题#e#

It was too dim on the toilet. Not looking away from the test, I wiped, flushed, and moved to the vanity. I flicked on the bright lights and set the test down. I took a step back, telling myself that I would wait the full three minutes and then look.

That didn’t work either. I put my hands on the counter and leaned down, glaring at the test. I still didn’t see a second line. I blinked. Or did I? “No,” I said to myself and looked at my reflection. “You’re imagining it.” I squeezed my eyes shut and took a breath. Then I looked at the test again.

The basement door opened and shut. The locks slid into place and Jackson clomped down the stairs. “My back fucking hurts,” he complained. “Addie?” he said when I didn’t move. “You okay?”

I turned around with tears in my eyes. My heart was pounding and I felt like I was going to pass out. I shook my head. “I’m pregnant.”





CHAPTER FORTY-THREE





JACKSON’S FACE TURNED white. “What?”

I held up the pregnancy test. I felt like I was going to throw up again, though this time I thought it was from nerves. “I’m pregnant,” I repeated. A mangled laugh erupted from deep inside of me, twisting into a sob. My knees felt weak, and I was dizzy. Jackson ran over and put his arm around me.

“It’ll be okay,” he said automatically.

“How?” I asked and turned into him. I wrapped my arms around his neck, still holding onto the pregnancy test. Everything felt surreal. This isn’t happening. “They’ll kill you,” I rushed out. My entire body trembled. “They really will. Oh God,” I sucked in air and exhaled quickly. “Jackson. They’ll kill you and make me watch. And then, and then …” I couldn’t finish talking.

“Addie calm down,” Jackson said, but his voice broke. He pulled me close. I could feel his arms shaking.

A million thoughts raced through my head. There was no way out. “They will kill you,” I stammered. “And then take it away from me.” My hand flew to my abdomen, and I suddenly felt very protective of the little life that was growing inside of me. I broke down in sobs.

Jackson scooped me up and carried me to the cot. He sat, keeping me in his lap. “No they won’t,” he told me, sounding like he actually believed it. “No one will find out.”

“Even if they don’t.” Tears quickly soaked the front of Jackson’s shirt. “Then what? I’ll be shipped off to Europe. I can’t hide being pregnant for long. And what will happen to the …” I couldn’t bring myself to say the word.

“Nothing will happen.” He put his hand over mine. “We’re getting out of here.”

“We’ve been saying that for the last two months,” I hoarsely reminded him. “And we’re still here.”

Jackson’s heart raced, his pulse thumping so hard I could feel it in his arms that held me together. He was trying hard to remain calm for my sake, and that made me feel even more emotional.

“I’ll think of something,” he promised. “I have to. We have to. You are right, Addie. They will kill me, and I don’t know what will happen to you.” He let out a shaky breath and squeezed me against him. “You can’t really be passed off as a born-again virgin anymore.”

“They’ll kill us both.”

Jackson bent his head down so that his cheek rested on mine. “I won’t let that happen.”

I nodded. I wanted to believe him so much it hurt. “What if someone notices before we leave?”#p#分页标题#e#

“They won’t. You don’t look pregnant.”

I gasped and pushed away from Jackson. “Yes, I do!” I put my hands on my cheeks. “My skin!”

“What?”

“Lily said my skin looked nice.” I was on the verge of panicking again.

Jackson raised an eyebrow. “That means you look pregnant?”

“The pregnancy glow!” I told him.

Jackson closed his eyes for a few seconds, steadying his nerves. “I honestly don’t think anyone will come to that conclusion.”

“How can you be sure?”

“I’m not,” he said nervously. “It’s what I want, though.”

“Me too.”