Braden fumbled with his keys and pushed the door. He knew something was wrong when Jock didn’t take him down when he stepped inside.
He let his eyes raise to the couch and—“Breaking and entering?”
Wes grinned at him from where he sat. “I figured you’re worth the risk of Jock trying to eat me.”
Braden laughed at that. Jock could never hurt a fly. “Glad you were willing to brave my killer dog for me.” He tossed his keys to the coffee table. When he tried to walk by the couch and to the kitchen, Wes reached out and grabbed his wrist.
“You’re worth more risk than that.”
Braden’s heart thundered, annoyance and hope colliding inside him. “You didn’t think so a few days or weeks ago.” He pulled his arm free, but then sat down.
“Not going to make this easy on me, are you?”
“Nah, but neither of us would want it that way.”
Even though Wes didn’t reply, Braden knew he agreed with him.
“I freaked. I know that’s not an excuse, but when I heard that story about Gavin...”
“I wasn’t in love with him. We dated, and then we were good friends, but I was never in love with him.”
“But you went with him. You left your family without much notice and uprooted your life because someone you didn’t love needed you. Jesus, that’s an incredible thing to do, Braden, but I didn’t want that for us.”
Braden shook his head. “What are you talking about?”
“Us. Me. We fucked the first night because I was lonely, and we got closer because I needed your help with Jess, with Chelle’s room. It was always me needing you. I don’t want you to make sacrifices because you’re honorable.”
Braden couldn’t help it, he laughed at that. “All of this happened because you think I don’t want to be with you?”
“Gavin—”
“Wasn’t you. I’ll admit shit with him started because—hell, I don’t know. Because I thought I could make things better for him, or get people to accept him. Maybe I do have some sort of hero complex. But me leaving with him had nothing to do with us. He was my excuse, Wesley. If I went because of him, I didn’t have to feel bad for leaving. We both had our reasons, his a whole lot more serious than mine, but I was young, and I wanted to see more of the world. Leaving with him just gave me a reason to go without feeling guilty. Gavin and I both knew that. It’s just my parents who didn’t.”
He grabbed the back of Wes’s neck and pulled him closer. “You dumb son of a bitch. I’ve never wanted to be with someone the way I want to be with you. And I guess this is partially my fault for never telling you, but fuck, I’ve never wanted someone the way I want you, Wesley. I push and push my way into any situation because I’m used to getting what I want, and...I didn’t want it to be that way with you. I didn’t want to screw it up by going too fast or...” He shook his head, knowledge planting there.
“I guess I needed to know you really wanted to be with me, too. I’ve never worried about shit like that before, but with you...hell, Wesley, everything’s different with you.”
***
Wes’s whole body felt like it was overheating. He could hardly hear Braden over the bass in his ears, but somehow he still knew what the man was saying. “You’re stealing my thunder, Braden.”
Braden’s eyebrows pulled together. Wes didn’t answer his silent question, just stood and nodded his head at Braden for the man to follow him. He led the way to Braden’s room.
“You really took this breaking and entering thing seriously, didn’t you? What were you doing while I was at work?” Braden teased as they stood at the bedroom door. Again, Wes didn’t reply.
He opened the door to Braden’s room and stood there, waiting. Nerves increased the bass, but he ignored it. Ignored everything as Braden stepped into the room. As he silently walked away from Wes.
“You wanted me to paint you a picture, so I did. I didn’t have time to do anything more than that, but I figured that’s the most real thing I can give you. Even if you say no, I’d understand it. I’d still want you. We’d find a way to make it work—”
“Shut up, Wesley.” Braden stopped in front of the canvas resting on the wooden easel. “You’re really askin’ me this?”
“I am. Maybe it’s wrong of me and I’m being selfish. I understand if you have to say no, but I needed to do it. I needed to risk my heart, because you’re worth it. And I’m worth it, too.”
Wes’s legs tingled as though they’d fallen asleep. He walked toward Braden and looked down at the canvas with him, at the four red letters in the middle of it.