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Speechless(164)

By:Hannah Harrington


                The art room is empty when I walk in, except for Ms. Kinsey.                     She’s standing on a stool, hanging some art piece made out of wire and ribbon                     from a ceiling hook.

                “Chelsea!” She sees me and smiles, one part pleased, one part                     concerned. “We missed you yesterday.”

                “Sorry I bailed,” I say, and she freezes.

                “And she speaks!” Great deduction                         there, I think, and then tell my brain to stop being rude. Ms. Kinsey                     doesn’t deserve that.

                She steps down from the stool and puts her hands on her hips.                     “When did this happen?”

                “Yesterday.” I pause. “Um. It’s kind of a long story.” I                     remember what I came for, and hunt through my bag for the whiteboard. “I wanted                     to give this back to you.”

                “Chelsea.” She doesn’t move to take the board from me, so I’m                     left holding it out there between us. “I’m very sorry for what happened                     yesterday.”

                “Why? It’s not like it’s your fault.”

                “No, it isn’t, but that doesn’t change the fact.”

                I get that. It’s like how I told Andy I was sorry for what                     happened to Noah, even though I knew by then I wasn’t really the one to blame.                     Sometimes you just have to apologize anyway.

                “I want you to know, I’ve graded you on the project,” Ms.                     Kinsey says. “I thought I’d seen enough beforehand to give a fair                     evaluation.”

                This surprises me. “Oh?”

                “Yes. And I think you and Sam will be very happy with it.”

                “Oh. Thank you.”

                She eyes me curiously. “So tell me, did you learn anything from                     this period of silence? Spiritually?”

                I don’t know if I learned anything spiritually. I’m still not                     exactly sure what that means. I mean, I didn’t spend any of the time thinking                     about God or faith or whatever. I spent it thinking about how much I hate                     myself, mostly. Maybe that makes me a major narcissist, I don’t know. A                     self-loathing narcissist, is that even possible?