We wind our way past the moms with their strollers and packs of preteen girls in their way too slutty outfits. Looking at these girls makes me sad, even though they don’t seem to be—they giggle in high-pitched voices, their faces stretched with glossy-lipped smiles. All of them are the same type; girls with overprocessed hair and too much makeup and way too much access to Daddy’s credit cards. Girls who, if you took away the designer labels, hair dye and cover-up, wouldn’t be more than average-looking, but with all that stuff look too plastic to be pretty.
I know because I used to look just like one of them. I’m wearing next to no makeup now, just a touch of mascara and some clear lip gloss. Compared to them, I’m practically naked. I haven’t set foot inside the mall in weeks. Saturday mall trips used to be a weekly tradition. But that’s over. Like so many things.
No. No angsting today. Time to cheer up, emo girl.
The crafts store is full of old ladies with too much perfume, and Asha and I are the youngest customers by at least thirty years. She goes straight to the yarn aisle, starts sifting through the shelves. I randomly pick up a roll of scratchy black wool.
“You should get some,” Asha says. “I said I’d teach you, right? I have some extra needles you can borrow.”
I do have some leftover Christmas money I haven’t spent. My grandparents on Dad’s side are crippling agoraphobics who live in Maine, and as compensation for seeing me only once every few years, they always send a hefty check. I was saving it for—irony of all ironies—a new Winter Formal dress. Ha ha ha.
Asha ends up with an armful of different-colored yarns, and I pick out the black wool for myself, since Asha says it’s good material to learn on. I try to imagine myself knitting like she does. Maybe I’ll fare better with knitting needles than I do with sewing machines.
We’re walking toward the food court when Asha grabs my sleeve and says, “Hey.”
She points to a window display where there are Barbie-shaped mannequins lined up, dressed in tight, flashy, fashionable formal dresses.