His father said something else, but though Xairn felt the drag of his mental command, it couldn’t control him. His heart, so long a cold and shriveled lump of carbon, was a glowing, beating star—a super nova in his chest. He was alive in a way he never had been before. Alive and filled with emotions he had been suppressing for a lifetime.
He wanted to rip the AllFather limb from limb and bathe in his blood. Wanted to throw back his head and howl like an animal scenting prey. But most of all, he wanted to take the woman in his arms right there, filling her with his cock as she writhed beneath him on the cold, hard floor while he pounded into her again and again as she screamed his name and…No! No, get hold of yourself!
Xairn shook his head, trying to force the disturbing feelings back, to hide them away and ignore them as he had been his entire life. But the door had been opened and there was no closing it—he was filled with urges he had never known before—urges he had sworn never to act on.
Must get Lauren out of here. Give her to the Kindred—keep her safe, away from me!
The AllFather’s eyes glowed. “You feel it, do you not, my ssson? The need to hurt, to dominate, to breed. You can renounce your race if you like but those needs within you mark you as Ssscourge. They are your birthright and you cannot essscape them.”
“No! I will never be like you—never.”
Turning, Xairn carried Lauren through the double doors and out into the long corridor that led to freedom. He had to give her to the Kindred warriors to take back with them as quickly as possible. He had to get her out of his sight.
Before he did something he would regret forever.
Chapter Thirty-five
“Stop for a minute. I need to take care of this.” Deep staggered to a halt as soon as they were out of the Scourge Complex.
Kat stopped beside him at once. “How can I help?”
He made a face and she knew he was in pain, though she couldn’t feel it the way she ought to. “Need you to…pull it out.”
“But I thought you said…what about the bleeding?”
“Bleeding be damned—can’t stand it anymore.” He looked at Lock. “Hold me steady while she does it.”
“Of course, Brother.” Stepping forward, Lock pulled his twin close and locked his arms around Deep’s broad chest. Then he looked at Kat. “Pull it out as quickly as you can. There’s no sense prolonging the agony.”
“Of course.” Kat felt like she might be sick but she realized that she didn’t have time for that luxury. I wish Liv was here, she thought, reaching for the handle of the black knife. She’d know how to do this. I’m not a nurse!
“Do it!” Deep said through gritted teeth.
Get on with it, girl! Stop stalling. Kat clenched her jaw and took a firm grip. “Here goes,” she said grimly and yanked as hard as she could.
The curving black and rust-red blade slid out smoothly. As the final inch came out of Deep’s side, he cried out and fell to his knees. Lock went down with him, holding him tight. When he looked up at Kat, there were tears in his brown eyes.
“I can’t help him,” he said hoarsely as the dark twin slumped in his arms. “I can’t feel his pain—can’t help him bear it.”
“Never mind.” Pressing a hand to his side, Deep somehow staggered to his feet again. It seemed to Kat like a superhuman effort—or a superKindred one, she supposed.
“I don’t understand,” she blurted, looking down at the hateful blade, still clutched in her fist. “How can you just go on like that? I thought even a scratch from one of these things was poison.”
Deep’s black eyes flashed. “I go on because I have no choice, little Kat. And as for the blade—it’s not a kusax.”
“It’s not?” Kat examined it more closely. It still looked like something an evil orc would carry straight to Mordor, only now it was sticky with Deep’s blood.
“No.” Lock, who was still helping to support his brother, shook his head. “A kusax is much smaller than that and it has a short, five-sided blade that ends in a bright green tip. It’s the tip that contains the poison—some say the AllFather has a throne made of the same metal.”
Kat remembered Liv’s description of the black metal throne etched in glowing, neon lines that the AllFather sat on in the Fathership. That must be it, she thought. Maybe it’s part of his power source or something. “So…” She looked back up at Deep and down to the long, curving knife in her hand again. “Does this mean you’ll be okay?”
“If we get him back to the Mother ship quickly. Twin Kindred have self-sealing internal organs. Come.” Lock jerked his head in the direction of the beach. “We still have to get through the old battleground.”