When the nurse yelled out code blue, my heart dropped to the floor. Knowing what that meant had me scared for both of their lives. All I could do was tell Jenna that everything would be fine even though I wasn’t sure. Guilt consumed my heart at that moment. When Jenna told me she was pregnant, a huge part of me wished she wasn’t. I was even upset about it, but now the possibility of losing our baby was devastating. How could I have ever wished the baby wasn’t conceived at all? Tugging a fistful of my hair with both of my hands, I took deep breaths. Please don’t let anything happen to our baby or Jenna, I prayed.
Unable to control my curiosity and needing to know that everything would be fine, I plastered my face against the small window, but it was frosted. I could hardly see a thing. Damn it! I had to pull myself together. This was not how I should be acting.
Just before my pulse shot up again, the door opened.
“You may come in now. Everyone is fine,” the nurse said, swinging the door wider.
“Thank God,” I huffed under my breath, and went straight to Jenna.
Jenna
“Is my baby okay?” I asked with hesitation. I was afraid to know. Oh God! What if my baby came out all blue and couldn’t breathe?
“They are working fast...almost done,” the anesthesiologist assured me.
I looked beyond the blue long cloth that blocked me from seeing what they were doing. I could understand why. I probably would have fainted from the sight of my guts all hanging out.
“And there...we are done.”
“That was fast,” I sighed. It was within a few minutes.
“Yes, we’re fast. We have to be. Every second matters.”
“Is my baby okay?” I was so scared to know...so scared to see.
“Why don’t you see for yourself?” The anesthesiologist looked up with a smile. Just as I was about to see whom he was smiling at, he called my name.
“Jenna.”
“Max.” I turned my head and more tears streamed down. I couldn’t help it. He was my comfort, my husband, and the father of our child. Max’s worried face made me frightened. “You did great, babe. I’m so proud of you.” His words made my heart pound faster and I was preparing to hear the worst. Before I could ask anyone what was going on, I saw a white and blue blanket laying on my chest.
“Congratulations,” Dr. Howard announced. “Here is your precious baby boy, but you already knew you were going to have a boy. Twenty-two inches and eight pounds.”
I didn’t know what to say. My mind was filled with millions of thoughts, and they were swimming around with so much joy that I couldn’t even fashion them into words. “Hi there.” It was all I could say as I stared into those beautiful brown shiny eyes filled with wonder...filled with curiosity...filled with love. As joyful tears ran down my face, all I could do was smile and thank God for keeping our baby boy safe.
“Mommy and Daddy promise to take good care of you. You come first.” I couldn’t help myself. I wasn’t sure if I was allowed to touch him due to possible germs on my finger, but I did it anyway. I was his mother. He lived inside of me for nine months. We shared a bond that only mothers and babies could understand. Nobody was going to tell me what I could or couldn’t do. With tiny strokes, I caressed his cheek. “Ahhh,” I sighed softly. I melted into his softness and into the newborn baby smell.
Max kissed my cheek. “I love you.” Then he kissed our baby’s forehead tenderly. “I love you very much. You gave us one huge scare, little one.”
“What’s the baby’s name?” the nurse asked.
“Connor Maxwell Knight. He’s named after Max’s grandfather,” I said proudly.
Max
“Are you comfortable, babe?” I asked, helping her adjust the bed with the remote control.
“I’m drugged up. I’m all good.” Jenna rewarded me with a faint smile. She looked so drained. “When is the nurse going to bring Connor?”
Right on cue, the nurse walked in. “Would you like to hold him?”
I stared at her for a brief second before I answered, “Sure.” Folding my arms in the position I was taught in Lamaze class, I was ready. An overwhelming sensation coursed through me when his precious small body was placed in my arms. At that very moment, there was another level of happiness that filled me up. I already loved him the moment I heard his heart beat, but this was beyond what I had prepared for.
Standing there, all I could do was stare at his round chubby face. His eyes were closed, but that didn’t stop me from studying and memorizing every inch of his face. With his cute little nose, perky little mouth, and full head of hair, he was my son.