Jenna took a deep sigh. “Matthew loves you and you love him.”
Oh God! This was too hard. Talking about Matthew only made me miss him more; the wall I built to try to forget him was crumbling down. “Jenna,” I swallowed, desperately trying to hold back my tears, “Matthew hurt me. You should have seen the look on his face. It’s etched so deeply in my mind that that is the only thing I see.”
“I understand, I really do, but you have to understand he was in shock. You knew about his past already and how much he was hurting. Then you came along. You were the only person he wanted to have a relationship with. I know he tried to call you. I know he tried to see you.”
I rolled my eyes. “Matthew told you?”
“No. Max did. Matthew is hurting a lot, too.”
There was a part of me that felt good that he was, but that didn’t mean a thing. “He walked out on me.” I paused. “I can’t do this, Jenna. You know my record with guys. I just added Matthew to my list.” When I stood up, the towel I was supposed to be folding dropped right down to the basket. Not wanting to show Jenna my tears, I headed for my room.
“Becky.” Jenna froze me in place when her tone didn’t sound as sweet as usual. I turned to see her standing. “You know damn well that Matthew does not belong on that list. People have their own way of dealing with things. I’ve always respected your ways even when I disagreed with them. You need to hear Matthew out. He at least deserves that. Then you can make up your mind.”
“Okay,” I sighed. I knew she was right, but I only said that to get her off my back. Jenna had no idea how much I missed him and ached for him. Not a second went by that I didn’t think of him and wish he was there with me.
“Okay?” Jenna sounded surprise.
“Okay.”
She grabbed her purse and started walking toward the door. Her laundry was still spread out on the sofa.
“Where are you going?” I asked. She was acting strange. “It’s almost dinner time. Are you trying to tell me I should follow you now?”
Jenna ignored me and opened the door. I froze. My heart took a dive right out of my chest at the first sight of Matthew’s body. Unable to look him in the eye, I turned away. When I heard the door close, I knew Jenna had left. That sneaky girl. I didn’t know she was capable of such treachery.
From that one-second glimpse of Matthew, my stomach fluttered in the familiar way it always did when I saw him. This made the ache even more painful. He looked so tired and worn, I wondered if he was lacking sleep like me.
“You can at least say hello to an old friend,” Matthew said, heading to the dining area. He pulled out a chair and sat in the same position as when I had done a lap dance for him. Recalling that incident made me laugh inside, but I would not let that affect me.
“Hi. What are you doing here?” My tone was cold, but I didn’t care.
“You wouldn’t take my phone calls, answer the door, or even text me back, so I had to reach out to my last resource.”
“Consider your last resource no longer your resource for anything. After the stunt she just pulled, she’s no longer my friend,” I snapped, though I didn’t mean a word I said.
“You don’t mean that.” Matthew leaned forward. He was a distance away, but I jerked back, thinking he was coming for me, and I bumped into the doorframe.
Ignoring him, I changed the subject. “It was nice of you to stop by, but I’m busy right now.”
“You’re lying and we need to talk. I’m not leaving until you hear me out,” he said sternly. I knew he meant it by the look on his face. “Come sit next to me and let’s talk like mature adults.”
I narrowed my eyes at him, not liking his comment. I knew I was being stubborn, but this was the only way I knew how to deal with problems. Running away had always been the easiest way out. “Fine. But I’ll stand here.”
“Okay.” Matthew nodded. “I’ll go first. Why didn’t you take my phone calls?”
“Because there is nothing to talk about. We were broken the minute you walked out the door.”
“I told you that I needed space. I didn’t say we were done. Don’t put your words in my mouth, Becca.”
For some reason, my anger grew. I could feel it boiling inside of me with every breath. “You thought I knew that my friend killed your precious Tessa and that I kept that secret from you,” I huffed. I couldn’t tame my emotions any longer; the hurt and anger were pouring out. “You blamed me for her death. You walked out on me even knowing how devastated I would feel.” Oh shit! Tears were coming.