“Mr. Elton.” Dr. Barney raises his chin and expertly peers down his nose at me. He’s plumped up a bit, and his age spots have spread evenly over his face giving him a tanned complexion. “I’m most devastated by some news that’s recently come to my attention.”
“Shit.” I hiss it out low. “Is Bradshaw all right?” What the hell am I saying? Obviously, Bradshaw is not all right.
“Professor Bradshaw is in remission.” He pulls back his lips, and his double chin quivers with anger. “Cruise, this news involves you, and, unfortunately, not you alone.”
He slides an enlarged photo across the table and my blood runs cold with just one look.
It’s Kenny and me that day back in my classroom. Her sweater dips past her bottom, her legs curve around my back, perfectly pale. My face is buried in her neck, and I can still feel the pleasure coursing through my veins as if I were reliving it.
He slides another shot my way. The tower stares back at me with its long, erect neck, the bony structure of the globe. Then a zoomed shot. You can’t see Kenny, just my coat as I help her into the center of the steel-caged world.
“And this.” He slips me another picture of the tower, this time a close up of my face lost in ecstasy—Kenny’s long mane whipping over my neck. “Well? What do you have to say for yourself?”
I stare down at them—Kenny and I in these compromising positions—her beautiful hair, her feathered skin, those lips I’d die to cover with mine just one last time.
What I’d really like to say is, can I have these? I’d like to spread them over my bed—lay over them naked, frame them, replicate them, and wallpaper my new crappy room with a dizzying pattern of who we once were—all of our adventures surrounding me like an erotic kaleidoscope.
“Now that I’ve rendered you speechless”—he rasps his knuckles over his desk—“I’ve one other thing to show you.”
This time it’s a simple sheet of paper he slides over—the revised syllabus I made just for her.
Fuck.
“How did you get this?”
“A young lady dropped them by, early this afternoon.”
Kenny? But how would she take the pictures? Most likely Blair and I wouldn’t put it past her to riffle through Kenny’s things and steal what she needed. I hold up the syllabus as exhibit A.
“Cruise, I’m sorry to have to do this, but your brief teaching career has come to a rather ignoble demise. Not only that, but I’ve had to report my findings to the board. We’ve unanimously agreed—your fellowship has been revoked. You’ve been expelled from Garrison.”
His words come to me in snatches. The room warps in and out, and I’m ready to bang my head over the table in the most literal fucking sense because all of my bad luck has managed to come crashing around me at once. The funny thing is, none of this bullshit matters.
“I’m sorry I’ve disappointed you, Dr. Barney.” I rise to my feet and take a breath.
“You don’t seem too broken up about it.”
“I’m not.” I press it out in a fit of honesty. “I lost the most important thing in my life last week—this is just a superficial wound in comparison.” The brevity of truth gives me pause. “I’m sorry if I’ve insulted you.”
“She asked me to give you this.” He hands me a small folded note.
I unravel it to find the words, Consider yourself played.
Friday afternoon, I manage to crawl out from under my mother’s watchful eye and head to the gym with the intention of tormenting every muscle in my body. I let her know I’m taking back the bed and breakfast. I’m ratcheting up the marketing to a whole new level and even suggested she air out those rooms because she can damn well expect more than a few guests. I plan on getting the financial cogs moving again. Maybe if I had more monetary stability in my life. Maybe then…
I wish I could I say I was over Kenny—nose to the wind, I’ll catch another bus and all that good to go bullshit, but she branded herself over my heart, my mind. She haunts my dreams, my waking hours. Kenny is the ghost, the one that got away. I have a feeling I’ll be wanting her, yearning for her long into my golden years until I take that eternal nap, and even then, I won’t be put out of my misery.
I get a text from Pen as I stroll into the gym.
It’s on like Donkey Kong. Alpha Sigma Phi tonight. See U there.
My stomach does a revolution.
Alpha Sigma Phi. That’s where it all started for Kenny and me.
Cal spots me as I walk into the weight room and heads over with a spring in his step. I bet he’s got a blowjob story I’m not going to believe.