15
Lake
Manning didn't look at me as I exited the hotel lobby and approached the BMW. Leaning against the passenger's side door, he flicked his cigarette away, but continued staring inside-at Corbin. "Get in the car," he said.
He didn't need to tell me twice. I was eager for time with him, something I hadn't had much of since the night at the lake. Manning didn't follow right away. It made sense if he had reservations about being alone in a car with me, but he'd picked me up anyway.
When he finally slid behind the wheel, I asked, "Can I come over? I don't want to go home."
He started the car and pulled away from the curb. "What happened?"
"Nothing. I just didn't want to stay."
"Did he pressure you?" He looked over with a fire I hadn't gotten from him in the months since I'd nearly fallen at his feet in the foyer. "Did he, Lake?"
"No."
"Because he's got it bad for you."
I gaped at him. "You knew?"
"Of course I know. I've got eyeballs."
The irritation in his voice irritated me. What right did he have to get upset about someone having a crush on me? I crossed my arms tightly over my chest. "He got us a room."
"And?" he pushed when I didn't continue.
I stared out the windshield. Everything I'd been holding since the last time we were truly alone flooded over me. He'd given me close to nothing since he'd gotten out, while I hadn't thought about much other than him. I loved him, and it hurt. Because of that, I let him fill in the blanks. It would be just a taste of what'd been running through my head these last couple years.
"Lake, if he hurt you-"
"He didn't."
"If he tried to get you to do anything you didn't want-"
"Maybe I wanted it."
He white-knuckled the steering wheel, breathing audibly. Manning's frustration was better than nothing, but at the same time, our time together was limited. I didn't want to sit in silence, fire-breathing or otherwise.
"Nothing happened," I said. I was fairly certain in adult terms, nothing had happened. If I told Manning I'd held Corbin's penis the way I'd shake his hand, he probably would've laughed. "Corbin's a gentleman."
"Then why are you here?"
I shifted in my seat, the "V" of my dress gaping. I tucked the fabric back into place. "I'm sorry I woke you."
He sighed. "You didn't. I was up."
"Why?" I smiled a little. "Were you worried about me?"
After a few seconds, he blew out a breath. "So much can go wrong."
He had been worried. Manning always seemed to be running the worst-case scenario in his mind. Who could blame him? He'd lived it once already with his sister. Then again when he'd gotten picked up for a crime he hadn't committed. "I'm sorry if you worried," I said. "It's hard to tell if you even care."
He stayed focused on the road.
"You can tell me if you do, Manning."
"What happened that night in the truck was wrong. I'm not looking for a repeat."
"Neither am I," I said quickly, and it was the truth. I didn't need to make the same mistakes, to deepen my already profound guilt. "I learned my lesson, but . . . what happens next month?"
He set his lips in a line. He understood what I was asking. "Nothing," he said.
"I turn eighteen."
"I know."
"And then I'll go to college. I'll be away from all of them."
He wiped his upper lip with his sleeve and turned on the air conditioning. I tried not to shiver. "I'm sorry you think I don't care about you," he said, "but it couldn't be further from the truth. I care too much."
"What does that mean?"
"Just leave it, Lake. It is what it is."
"It doesn't have to be that way. If you care about me at all, you'd break up with her before-"
He slammed his palm against the steering wheel. "This isn't about her, it's not even about me. It's about you going off and accomplishing everything you're supposed to. Do you want to end up like your sister? No education, in a job she hates, living with a felon who can't even take care of her?"
I mashed my teeth together. Tiffany might not have much in everyone else's eyes, but she had Manning, so she had everything. I'd take that life in a heartbeat just to be with him.
"Forget about me. Go to 'SC. Do something meaningful with your life and I promise you, one day . . ."
I waited, hopeful, as he turned on his blinker and took a left into the apartment complex. "One day?"