I shook my head sorrowfully.
"No Rach, it doesn't matter," I said. "He doesn't want to see me. Even if I found his contact information, what good would it do? He doesn't want me," I said brokenly.
And my friend crooned into my hair, like a mother hen comforting a sad chick.
"No worries, no worries," she chanted gently. "You're going to be okay. A man took your virginity and left, but it's okay, the first one is always hardest."
And that's when my head snapped up, eyes blazing a bit.
"But that's the thing," I said sharply. "Mr. Black didn't take my virginity. Not my pussy one at least, only, you know, my behind," I said, cheeks coloring.
And my friend pulled away, looking at me confused.
"But I thought you said you were sold for a premium because you were a virgin," Rachel said slowly. "So your buyer didn't take you, didn't consummate the transaction? Or he only took you in back? Anal only?" she said disbelieving, head shaking.
And I nodded, letting out an unladylike snort.
"Yeah, in back only," I confirmed. "Troy said he wanted to leave me "untouched" so that I could go back to my old life, so that I could resume like our love had never happened, that the memory of him would disappear in a poof. I don't know what he was thinking, that's not how people operate, that's not how life is," I said, bitter again. Why hadn't I been able to convince him? If there was anything precious to me, it was having his dick in my pussy, a memory that would last me for the ages, keep me warm at night. And now I didn't even have that, and I felt so stupid, so lost, so sad more than anything. Another wave of depression crashed over me and the tears began to well once again, sobs coming out like gale force winds, terrible to hear, croaks and rasps of agony.
"He doesn't love me," I blubbered, nose running, wiping at my eyes futilely. The waterworks were at full force and even the box of tissues Rachel handed to me silently wasn't enough. "Mr. Black doesn't love me."
But my friend wasn't so sure. She paused for a moment, biting her lip and then turned towards me, expression gentle.
"Ellie," she said softly. "I think you have it all wrong. I think this man adores you, absolutely worships the ground you walk on."
"No way," I blubbered again. But the tears were coming so fast it sounded more like "Nwmwmw."
"No seriously El," she said again. "This man, Mr. Black, loves you to death, I think something just got lost along the way," she said thoughtfully. "I think somehow the two of you got your wires crossed and that actually this man loves you so much that he was willing to let you go."
That was totally wrong, twisted logic, and I shook my head vigorously.
"Why would you let someone go if you loved them? Why would you kick them out of your house, physically dump them into a waiting car, unless you wanted to get rid of the woman?"
And Rachel shook her head.
"Only Mr. Black can answer that honey, you know I don't know," she said again, her voice gentle, soothing. "But I think you should ask him yourself," she added with determination. "I think you should find him and ask him."
I almost cracked apart then.
"Find him and ask him?" I parroted dumbly. "This guy wants nothing to do with me, he paid for his week and is done. Completely done."
But Rachel shook her head again, eyes still thoughtful.
"No, I don't think so, Ellie. A man who had every right to take your virginity, hell, who paid for the right to take your virginity, would never leave something like that on the table. These are guys who press every advantage, they didn't get to where they are without knowing how to work every angle. And the fact that Mr. Black left money on the table … " she said, her voice trailing off.
"Money on the table means … " I prompted, wanting to hear the words.
But Rachel just shook her head again.
"You have to ask him yourself, El," she repeated firmly. "I think he loves you but the only way to know for sure is to talk to him."
And my heart crumpled again. I couldn't go back into the lair, couldn't make myself vulnerable again, my heart was breaking as is. Mr. Black had a hold on me, my sensitive soul in his hands, and he'd done nothing but smash it on the ground, destroying me, turning me into a sorrowful mess, hair tangled and eyes red as I sobbed my heart out. How could I go back to take more pain? How could I expose myself again to potential hurt?
But Rachel just shook her head, giving me a comforting squeeze.
"Listen El, I know it's the last thing you want to hear, but sometimes you've got to hear it from the mouth of the horse to be sure," she said. "So find him and ask him," she said sturdily. "You're better off with a definitive answer."
I took a deep breath. I couldn't possibly, wasn't that obvious? But I made myself smile tremulously. "I'll think about it," I murmured, too heartsick to say more. "Thanks for the support."
And Rachel gave me a real hug then.
"Listen Ellie, you're my best friend, have been since we were five. I know we've grown apart a little, you were always so good at school while I sucked at it, so thanks for letting me copy your homework all those times," she said with a wry grin. "But you're still my best friend despite everything and I want what's best for you," she said seriously. "So don't let this one go, okay? Because although I come off as a silly flibbertigibbet most of the time, I still care about you, and my spidey sense tells me that this man loves you. Don't give up so easily, it's not you, it's not the Ellie I know and love."
And my eyes started filling with tears again.
"Thanks Rach," I said softly, "I really appreciate it. I really appreciate it, and I want the best for you in Dubai."
"I know," she replied with a gentle smile. "Only you would want the best for me in this hare-brained scheme, that's why I love you so much, your unfailing belief in me. And I have that in you, too. So go," she encouraged. "Go back to the compound and find him."
I started in my seat.
"Go back to the Billionaires Club?" I asked dumbly. "Find Mr. Black through the Club?"
And Rachel nodded.
"Where else?" she asked. "And guess what? I still have the address in my phone, we Ubered there that night, remember?"
And with a couple quick swipes, there it was on the screen, 4514 Stanton Street. My eyes watered a bit, but I made myself commit it to memory.
"Thanks Rach," I said, voice trembling a bit. "I think I will find Troy."
"I know you will, otherwise I'll tell Ahmed to," she added cheerily. "And then there'll really be a mess!"
And I had to laugh then, the first ripple of happiness to go through my soul in a while. Because you know what? Rachel was right. The whole virginity thing had spiraled out of control and gone completely haywire. On the one hand, Troy had had a good plan, meticulously planned and thought-out. The alpha hadn't taken my virginity because he was going to release me back into the world, and wanted me to recover as soon as possible from our loving, from our deep, intimate connection. But that's where it all went screwy. Because just as I couldn't separate the physical and the emotional, neither could he. And so everything had gone off the rails. The big man thought he could protect me by not touching my sweetest spot, but instead, feelings had seeped into every nook and cranny of our hearts, every breath, every unspoken promise, and Troy Black was just as head over heels as me. So although the alpha hadn't penetrated me in my most intimate space, ultimately it didn't matter. The emotional was there, the hold on our hearts, on our bodies, the love between us stronger than the heavens themselves … and I just had to make him see it.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Troy
I was so fucking depressed and angry at once. Is there a word for that even? Dangry? Angpressed? I had no idea and just shook my head furiously. Watching Ellie leave my estate, watching the car carry her away had been the single worst moment of my life and my heart fucking died thinking about it. I'd never see those titties bounce again as she rode up and down my cock, never drive my dick between those sweet ass cheeks, making her moan, shiver with wanting me.
So I was back at the compound to take out my frustration and desperation. And fuck yeah, that fucker Miles got it. After confronting him, the lesser man turned into a blubbering mess, sobbing, dropping to his knees, touching his forehead to the ground as he admitted abducting the two girls.
"Please sir," he begged. "They wanted it! They were sluts, they were begging for it!"
I roared, kicking him once in the stomach with a heavy boot.