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So. Long(243)



Buck purses his lips, shooting Arianne a frustrated look.

When he turns back to me, he says, “Wait. She’s lying. She has to be lying. It’s been weeks. Weeks and weeks. She’d have known before now.”

Arianne steps to him, sliding her hand over his chest. “Oh, I did know, Bucky. I just wanted to tell you in person.”

Her news. She said something before about news. This news.

I turn and run.





I leave Arianne standing behind Lou’s old home. Taking my phone from my pocket, I call my attorney first. He advises me to insist on a paternity test. Well, no shit. I’ve never had sex with Arianne that I didn’t use protection. Never.

Lou’s the only one I’ve ridden bareback. If she were to tell me she was pregnant, I’d have a completely different reaction.

Fuck.

Lou.

How will I ever get her to admit she still loves me with shit like this happening?

My foot hits the bottom step to Delores’s place when my phone rings. I pull it out.

Bob. Great. I shouldn’t get a fucking rock in my gut just because my manager calls, but with the way this day has been going…what now?

“Yeah?”

“Buck. What happened at the hospital, my man?”

The hospital? Oh, yeah. Damn. What a fucking day.

“I took a fall, hit my head. I guess I was confused.”

“Confused? There are pictures of you burning up the internet. Luckily, most of them have blurred out your junk. Most of them.”

“Listen, I don’t have time for this right now. Take care of it. Hire a fucking PR team. Do whatever. I have other things that need my attention right now.”

“So, you slipped? Head injury?”

“Yeah. That’s right. Hey, I’ve gotta go. Fix it.”

“Injury is good. We can claim you were delirious.”

I knock on the front door. “Sure. That works. Whatever.”

Hanging up, I knock again.





TWENTY-ONE





I steel myself, clearing my expression, and I open the door. “What can I do for you, Buck?”

“You can come with me so we can talk in private.”

“I’m busy.”

He looks me up and down. “Doing what?”

I deadpan. “Spelunking.”

He cocks his head, his brow wrinkling. “Cave exploration? That’s the best you can come up with?”

“Oh, shut the fuck up. What the hell do you think? I’m trying to avoid you, Asshat.”

Buck holds out his hand. “Lou. Please.”

I swallow the tears trying to carry away my composure. “Just go, Buck. Go back to your cameras, car races, and red carpets. You don’t belong here anymore. You belong with your Hollywood girlfriend and your—your baby.”

His nostrils flare and he sucks in a deep breath. “That’s not my baby, Lou. I’m telling you, it can’t be.”

“So say how many guys every year? Look, my dad split before I was born. It sucks to grow up fatherless. Don’t be that man. Surely you’re better than that. You used to be better than that.”

I close the door. Leaning against it, the pain from that box I shoved deep inside years ago digs its way out through my tight throat, leaving claw marks on my soul.

I slide to the floor, hot tears pooling in my eyes before spilling down my cheeks.

He hollers, “This ain’t over, Lou. I’m telling you, it isn’t my kid. That fuck trophy belongs to someone else.”

I wouldn’t expect any man to be happy about this kind of news, but still, to behave this way? Calling a baby—maybe his baby—a fuck trophy?

Maybe his leaving me behind all those years ago was a good thing after all. Too bad he didn’t stay gone.




I step into the living room.

Sadie looks up, startled.

She immediately points the remote at the television, mashing buttons and looking flustered. “Why won’t it turn off? What’s wrong with this thing?”

Aunt Delores snatches it from her. “Because it’s old like me and just as broke-ass.”

“What’s going on?” I say.

Sadie jumps up and stands in front of the screen. “Nothing. What’s going on with you these days, Cuz?”

Aunt Delores fans herself as she gets to her feet. “Lou, would you be an angel and get me something to drink?”

I turn toward the kitchen, but stop when whoever’s on the TV says, “Loula Fontaine, former U.S. Marine, appears to be taking money from Buck Wylder in this photo outside of a hotel nearby Mr. Wylder’s childhood home.”

I push Sadie aside. “What are they saying? What is this?”

My heart rate trips into double time as a photo of Buck handing me a wad of cash through my car window pops up on the screen.

“Holy shit.”