My hands are a poor substitute for the real thing, but I rub my bud and thrust my fingers as deep as I can. I recall every touch, every dip of his tongue, every pounding plunge of his cock, until my pussy pulses with the memory and gives me a fraction of the release Buck evoked.
Some release is better than nothing. It’ll have to do, because getting involved with Buck again is the path to ruin, and I’ve been down that road.
I’ll have to avoid him until one of us leaves.
Shouldn’t be too hard. His camera crew will keep him occupied. And I’ve got this house to contend with. All I need to do is figure out where we’ll get the money to finish all the projects Uncle Manny didn’t get to complete.
Unfortunately, separating from the military doesn’t come with a golden parachute. It didn’t come with much, really. A DD-214, a military education in munitions and ordnance assembly, and a nice piece of paper with a shiny gold seal and scrolled writing declaring my honorable discharge.
Whooptie-fucking-do.
FIVE
My door bursts open. I crack an eyelid. Oh joy, Sadie, Aunt Delores’s real niece, is here. Fabulous. I raise my head just enough to pull the pillow from under it and yank it over my eyes.
I whisper, “Go away.”
“Time to get up, Sleepyhead. Aunt Delores tells me you’re going to town later. I need a ride.”
I wave her out the door. “Later doesn’t mean to wake my ass up at unreasonable hours of the day.”
“Unreasonable? It’s ten-thirty.”
I sit bolt upright. “Ten-thirty?”
Damn Buck. I left his ass downstairs last night, but he didn’t leave my mind all night long. Thoughts of him—of us together—kept me awake until almost dawn.
Shit. I’m supposed to meet the lady at the temp agency in less than an hour. And why do I have to cart Sadie around anyway?
Actually, Sadie’s not that bad. She’s always treated me like I’m real family, and not just an honorary niece, who was taken in for a few months after my world shattered, while I finished high school and waited to start college.
Of course, I decided to blow this podunk town and see the world, knowing I’d never leave behind my past as long as I lived here. I’d also never rid myself of the mantle of depression weighing on my shoulders when Buck walked away that last morning, saying goodbye as if I should be happy to see him go.
I shake off the clingy hands of memories that push so close to the surface these days, waiting to climb from the hole I’ve crammed them into. Not today.
I squirt toothpaste onto my toothbrush and stuff it into my mouth while I turn on the shower. As I pull away from the faucet, I knock all four of my travel sized bottles onto the floor. They roll to the side of the tub.
I grab the shampoo. “What the hell?”
Warm air seeps in from the seam where the tub meets the floor. I get to my hands and knees, sliding the tips of my fingers along the edge of the linoleum. It’s pulled away from the place where it should be attached. I bend to inspect what surely can’t be right.
I peel back the linoleum. The wood beneath is soft and squishy, the edge of the tub sinking into it so much that the particle board is fraying. The subfloor’s coming apart. This whole house is falling apart at the seams.
I drop to my ass, rubbing the ache between my eyes.
Nice. Really fucking nice.
I forgo the shower. Falling through the floor would put a crimp in my plans for the day. A job is a top priority, rather than just helping clear things out and clean up. I need to make some money to help fix this house before it falls apart around Aunt Delores’s ears.
I hurry through my abbreviated morning routine. I grab the list of places I need to stop today, shoving it into the side pocket of my tote bag. Hiking it over my shoulder, I head to the kitchen.
With one shoe on and the other in my hand, I slosh some coffee into a cup. As I slip the other ballet flat onto my foot, Sadie shakes her head and covers her mouth, not at all concealing her giggle.
“What’s so funny?”
Sadie points at me. “Think you forgot something, Cuz.”
“Ah, fucking hell.”
I drop the tote on the counter and rush to my suitcase. I dig until I find the one piece of clothing I have that never wrinkles. The job search might take a strange turn if I do it with no bottoms on. I wiggle into the black skirt as I slide back into the kitchen.
Sadie drinks the milk from her cereal bowl. She plops it on the table with a thud and wipes her white mustache with the corner of the tablecloth.
I frown. “Really?”
She smoothes the edge of the cloth. “It worked, didn’t it? I can’t be going out in public with that shit dribbling down my chin.”