She wanted to be closer to him and she instinctively moved to press her body to his but banged her hip into the console instead. A little startled gasp escaped her and he froze, his gaze catching hers. His eyes were beautiful, she thought idly, a vivid blue flecked with gold and rimmed by unfairly long eyelashes.
She saw a dazed arousal there, heavy-lidded and sensual, that made her insides thrum with need as if he had pressed his mouth to the curve of her breast. She leaned forward for more of those delicious kisses, but just before her mouth could slide against his, he growled an expletive that seemed to shock both of them.
“What?” she demanded.
Yes, it had been a while for her, but surely she hadn’t completely forgotten how to kiss, had she?
He didn’t answer, but he didn’t have to. She suddenly recognized the subtle shift in his expression, the brief instant of pity followed by self-disgust, and she knew.
He suddenly remembered who she was, what had happened to her. It was as clear as a road sign on his features. This had nothing to do with the two of them. His reaction was based on what happened to her a year ago.
He was seeing her not as an attractive woman with needs and desires, but as a victim. The poor, pathetic widow who had been unable to fight off her late husband’s partner and then had been too frightened and weak to report the attack.
Except for that first initial burst, she had been too busy enjoying every second of that kiss to be nervous. She had wanted only to close her eyes and enjoy all those delicious sensations.
She didn’t quite understand how panic could flare through her now, when he wasn’t even touching her.
Marshall swore again and raked a hand through his hair. “I’m sorry. That...shouldn’t have happened.”
He was sorry. She was still soft and warm and gooey inside and he was sorry he had kissed her. Her throat suddenly felt ridiculously tight and she leaned farther back in her seat.
Oh, how she hated Rob Warren for ruining something else beautiful and right in her life.
“It’s no big deal. You kissed me. I enjoyed it. End of story.”
For a moment, he looked uncertain, as if he wasn’t quite sure how to reply to her casual response.
“I...should have been more considerate, under the circumstances. I don’t know, maybe I should have given you a little warning or something. I wasn’t thinking.”
“That’s the second-nicest thing you’ve ever said to me,” she said with complete honesty. “A woman likes knowing a man loses his head a little around her.”
Too bad he had found it again so soon.
She didn’t want to have some awkward conversation where he apologized again or asked if she needed to go into counseling or something, simply because of an unexpected but not at all unwelcome kiss.
“I should be going,” she said briskly, determined to change the subject. “Sadie is probably more than ready to go out again and the kids will be home soon.”
Trying to act casual and unaffected, she opened the door and climbed out. The December breeze off the river quickly cooled cheeks she feared were bright red. When she handed him his crutches from the backseat, he frowned, looking as if he wanted to say more, but she didn’t give him the chance.
“If you’ll wait here, I can carry the box of files and your laptop and then come back to spot you on your way in.”
As she might have expected, he didn’t seem to favor that idea much. By the time she unlocked the door with her key, he had maneuvered his way out of the vehicle and was halfway up the sidewalk.
Stubborn man.
She set the box and computer inside, then returned to the porch to watch him move with his inherent grace. She didn’t need to worry about him. He seemed to be much more comfortable on the crutches every day.
“I forgot the rest of your sandwich and your special cookies from Ali.”
Without waiting for him to answer, she returned to her vehicle, found the bag, then carried it into the house.
She found him in the kitchen filling a cup of water. The afternoon sunlight streamed in through the original stained glass transom on the kitchen window, creating a kaleidoscope on the polished wood floor with splotches of swirling, intense color.
He looked solemn again, no trace of a smile. His obvious regret at kissing her stung, but she decided she wouldn’t let it bother her.
“Here you go,” she said, holding up the bag. “You’ve got half a sandwich left, which might be tasty for dinner.”
“Thanks,” he said.
She opened the refrigerator and found room for it. “Do you need anything else?” she asked, pointing to the refrigerator’s well-stocked shelves. “I’ll probably be running to the grocery store tonight or tomorrow. They’re saying a big storm is coming early next week and I need to be sure I’ve got all I need for Christmas dinner.”