Snow Like Ashes(38)

I throw open a door. Stars glitter in the black sky above me, small twinkling eyes that watch as I slam the door shut and dive into the fantastic nighttime chill of Cordell’s autumn. The pureness of the cold hits me, threatening to pull out the scream I’ve been holding in for the past ten minutes.

“Meira.”

I pivot toward Mather and Sir, standing in the entrance to a hedge maze. Half of me wants to run to them and cry and beg to leave, half wants to start throwing rocks at their heads.

But I’m a soldier. A Winterian soldier. And apparently a future queen of Cordell.

So I pick up a handful of rocks from beside the path and hurl the small stones at them as I step forward.

“You—giant—awful—traitors!” I stumble to a halt a breath from Mather. That last rock hits him in the shoulder and he flinches back, rubbing the bruise.

“Meira, calm yourself,” Sir says, putting his hand on my arm.

I grab his wrist and slam him back into the hedge, my other hand going to his throat before I know what I’m doing. I’m pinning Sir to a wall of shrubbery. I never thought I’d be in this situation.

“Why?” I growl at him. “Why would you do this to me?”

Sir doesn’t fight; if he did, I’d be on the ground with a few broken fingers. “We had no choice.”

“No,” I spit. “I have no choice. You forced this decision on me. Why?”

“I did it,” Mather answers.

My whole body convulses. No, he didn’t. He couldn’t. Because Mather of all people knows what it’s like to have Sir say he’ll be married off to some random royal he’s never met because that’s all he’s useful for. Didn’t Mather tell me he knew how horrible it felt to be valued for the wrong things?

Didn’t I mean anything to him?

I release Sir and turn, my body numb from head to heels.

“When Dendera and I got to Bithai, I met with Noam,” Mather starts. “I explained what happened. We have half the locket; we’re that much closer to getting our conduit back. And now, with Noam already helping Autumn, I told him Winter’s interests and Cordell’s are nearly identical. If he overthrows Spring, Autumn will be saved. But—”

“Autumn does not need Spring overthrown.”

The voice booms out of the darkness and we all turn, focusing on the looming shape at the entrance of the hedge maze.

Noam. I’m going to yank his eyes out through his nostrils.

I’m not sure whether Sir reads my thoughts or my sudden strike-to-kill expression, but he grabs my wrist to hold me back.

“Autumn needs time. They need a few years to keep the Shadow of the Seasons at bay while Princess Shazi grows. Once she’s old enough to use her conduit, Autumn will be able to handle Spring on its own.” Noam steps to the side, leans casually on a statue at the hedge maze entrance. “It is not in my best interest to stage all-out war with a Season.”

Mather lurches toward him. “What makes you think Shazi will be able to hold off Spring once she’s older? Regardless of Autumn’s strength, Spring will not be satisfied staying within its own borders. You’ve seen Angra’s evil! He will spread anywhere he can—”

Noam holds his hand up. “We have been down this road, King Mather. And you know my stance.”

Mather growls. “My mother did not surrender her power to Angra. She did not give up.”

But Noam ignores him. “Angra is not so ambitious that he will attempt to expand to a Rhythm. The Seasons’ problems will remain among the Seasons, and my niece will not be as weak as Hannah.” Noam turns his smile to me. “And I believe Winter has potential. I believe you will be able to reopen your mines and rebuild your kingdom. So yes, Cordell will aid Winter. We will give you support and safety, as long as our support and safety do not extend to a Cordell-Spring war.”

I shake my head, unable to piece his words together. It doesn’t make sense. He’ll help us—but he won’t help us? He thinks Winter will be restored, but he won’t do anything to get us there. What does he think will happen?

Something he said stands out, and I gasp.

“You’ll take our mines because you’re linked to Winter now. You’ll try to find the chasm.” I pull out of Sir’s grip to surge toward Noam, my fingers wanting to reach back and grab my chakram and slice through his skull. “You’ll tear our kingdom apart to find it!”

Noam steps toward me. “Politics do not leave much room for free gifts, Lady Meira. I cannot afford to give another kingdom something for nothing. Yes, I expect payment.”

Fury rises up my body and I start panting. “You have everything,” I spit. “Cordell has everything. You even have Autumn now—and still you want another Season’s resources? You might not find it, you know that, right? What makes you think you’ll have any more luck than the people who have lived there for thousands of years?”