Surprised by the doorbell interrupting my feeling-sorry-for-myself session, I got up reluctantly and headed towards the door.
“Hello, Devan,” my mother greeted me from the doorstep, her eyes furious, and barged past me into the house.
“Er, hi,” I replied and shut the door.
My eyebrows shot up as I leaned in for a hug, which she refused. She was pissed, yet I had no idea why. Before I could ask, she started yelling at me.
“Why the hell are you back here?” she barked and I just stared at her in confusion.
“Cause this is where I live? What are you on about, Mom?” I demanded to know.
“You know exactly what I’m talking about, mister,” she said as she jammed a finger into my chest.
I couldn’t help it - a smile appeared on my lips, it always amused me when my tiny mom, five foot two, shouted at me from all the way down there. But she was obviously angry, and even though I had no idea why, I had a feeling I was about to find out.
“Don’t you grin at me like that! This is serious, Devan!”
“Fine,” I said and wiped the smile from my face. “Care to explain what this is all about?” I asked as I followed her inside, finally stopping in the kitchen.
“As if you don’t know!” Mom huffed and puffed as she set her purse down on the counter and came up to me. “It’s about Mila, you buffoon.”
My expression darkened and I looked away.
“Oh, now he’s embarrassed,” my mother sighed dramatically. “I have a right mind to smack you silly, Devan.”
“How about you butt out instead?” I asked her through gritted teeth. I didn’t want a talking to from my mother, of all people, about this. It was embarrassing. The simple fact was Mila had moved on, and I had just started coming to terms with it.
“I will not, because you’re doing the wrong thing,” Mom said determinedly. “I kept my mouth shut the first time around, and you have a failed marriage now. But I won’t let you walk away from happiness. Not now that…” she trailed off.
“Now that what?” I asked.
She shook her head.
“I can’t turn her life upside down again,” I admitted weakly. “I went there and saw her with someone else… She’s moved on Mom! I was a prick to her, and she probably thinks I’m scum. I cheated on Monique.”
“Yeah, I can do the math, honey,” my mom said, but I didn’t fully understand her comment. We exchanged hesitant smiles. After that, she sighed and took my hand in hers.
“But - and I’m not excusing anything – do you love her?” she asked softly.
I didn’t have to think about my answer. Even if I had tried to lie, my eyes would reveal the truth. “I do,” I admitted.
“But Mom, she’s my stepsister,” I said next, and she interrupted me before I could get another word out.
“Stop finding excuses, Devan,” she scolded, her tone stricter than before. “Why are you so afraid to go after what you want?”
I was quiet for a long time.
“She called me, you know?”
I shook my head. “What did she say?”
With sad eyes my mom replied, “She’s not over you, either. I’m sure of it.”
“But what did she say?” I demanded.
“You need to talk to her if you want to find that out, Devan.”
My mom refused to speak on the subject after that, no matter how hard I tried to wrangle any further information from her. It was no use, so we had a quick cup of coffee together before she left on another errand.
After I closed the front door, I tumbled on the couch in my living room, feeling exhausted. But I couldn’t stop my mind from wandering. I knew my mother was right - I was being a jackass staying away from her. The only way I was going to either move on or find out what the hell was going on was to speak to her directly.
I’d been waiting all this time... and for what? I should have gone after her the moment she left the apartment above the garage.
Guilt and remorse flooded me. This time, I wouldn’t walk away, no matter what.
29
Mila
I couldn’t stop myself from thinking about Devan. I tried to keep busy - which isn’t a hard task with a three-month-old baby - yet the thought of my stepbrother kept invading my mind.
But the thought I kept coming back to - he didn’t say hello. He may have stopped in my town, be it for business or otherwise, but he never said a word or had the courage to knock on my door.
Maybe I was right all along. He’s a cold-blooded snake. If he really wanted me, he would have done anything to get me back. Instead he stayed away like a coward. Yes there had been a few phone calls but that wasn’t enough…