Snake (a Stepbrother Romance)(39)

If I left this town, I’d be leaving him behind… leaving my heart behind too.

But realistically, it would be the perfect fresh start, a clean slate, a way to get out of the mess I’d made.

Maybe it was cowardly to run, to try to outpace my problems instead of facing them head on. Yet I knew what Dev’s reaction would be if I told him; if I let him into my heart even more than I already had, he’d make me stay.

Was I strong enough to do that? To let him go?

It meant leaving everything that could have been in the dust, never giving him a second thought. I’d also be far enough away that he couldn’t visit me frequently if he decided to pursue me.

Maybe that was exactly what I needed, though.

In my hand, the phone started to vibrate again and I looked at the screen with an ache in my heart. My stepbrother’s name was plastered over the screen.

I stared at the number for a long time before disconnecting the call.

I had to be strong.

A second call from him came in and I jabbed an angry finger at the decline button.

I needed to figure it all out by myself. I needed peace.

If I talked to Devan, he’d influence my decision one way or another. And I didn’t want to meddle in his life any more - I’d already done my fair share of home wrecking.

My phone started to vibrate once again in my hand and I let out a growl, ready to answer the call and tell him to leave me alone, but when I looked down it took me a moment to register the number flashing at me was not Devan’s.

Instead, it was my cousin Suzanne, and in that moment, I felt so relieved. I hadn’t confided in her in a long while – I hadn’t dared for fear that I might let something slip – but I knew if I didn’t let some of my anxious worries out, the weight of my troubles would slip tight around my neck and choke me if I didn’t tell her at least a part of what had been happening.

Maybe she would understand, I hoped.

I answered the call, swiping right with determined fingers, and took a deep breath.

“Hello, Suzanne,” I said, my voice a little shaky, which I tried to hide with a small laugh at the end of the sentence.

“Hey, my long lost cousin,” Suzanne greeted me with her perpetual excitement, and my smile became real as we started chatting.

We talked about this and that, her letting me know about all the wonderful no-strings attached sex she was having, and I realised that I had truly missed my crazy cousin. She was always my confidante and I could count on her in times of crisis or to make me laugh; she was always lifting my spirits when she wasn’t even trying. So even though I knew I couldn’t tell her everything just yet, I decided to tell her a bit of what was going on.

“So, what’s happening with you?” Suzanne asked me, and I grabbed the opportunity to share a tiny glimmer of what life had been like with the Hallers.

“The deal with Monique and Devan kind of fell through,” I admitted brokenly, and I could hear Suzanne’s surprise through her sudden silence.

“I’m sorry, honey,” she said after a long pause. “What happened? Everything okay? Are you okay?”

“It’s just...” It’s just I slept with my stepbrother and wrecked his marriage, I thought sadly. But the words that came out of my mouth told a different story. God, I wished I could tell her.

Suzanne remained quiet as I figured out a way to proceed with the conversation.

“They’re fighting a lot, and I wasn’t comfortable… It’s probably not for me to say, but I think it was their last attempt to save their marriage. And I couldn’t in good conscience help them bring a baby into an already broken house,” I said, bringing the partial truth to light. Suzanne made sympathetic noises down the line.

“I saw a bit of that at the brunch,” she said. “I guess it’s for the best. Are you still staying at their apartment?”

“I’ve no idea,” I realised out loud, as the full extent of my plight became reality. I obviously couldn’t stay in their apartment, rent free, after everything that had happened. Hadn’t Monique screamed for me to get out anyway? It’d all been a blur.

“Well, you could always crash at my place for a bit if you wanted. It’s tiny but it might be handy since I do live close to your office,” Suzanne offered. She was trying to make me feel better, I could tell.

“Seriously, what would I do without you? I think I might take you up on that for a few days. But–”

“But what? I won’t take no for an answer. And you know I always get my way!”

“Well, I do have some good news,” I said, pausing, keeping her in suspense. “Since you asked, I kind of just got a promotion at work,” I admitted in a small voice. Suzanne’s shriek down the line brought a smile on my lips, and she happily interrogated me about the new position and bump in pay.