I woke up on a Tuesday morning in my new place and, as I had each day since I’d moved in, I smiled and shook my head at how perfect it was. The sun shone in through a window near the roof, and the space was bright and roomy. I got up and put on my robe. I had the day off and had hoped that both Devan and Monique would want to have a breakfast out somewhere, but Devan had said last night that he had an early morning meeting and would be at work all day. Monique mentioned that she’d be going to work out, at the gym I think, so I was on my own, which would be a nice change.
I started some coffee brewing and looked through the paper. The sections were already split out, so I knew either Devan or Monique or both of them had already been through their morning routine. I cracked some eggs into a pan and put some toast down. While I waited, I flipped through the horoscopes. They always cracked me up. Today’s was, “Soon, your loyalties will be tested.” Great, I thought.
I’d only just sat down to eat breakfast when I heard a loud thump from down the hall and Monique laughing. I walked to the hallway and listened; I hadn’t thought either of them was home. I could hear soft music playing and more laughter coming from the den at the end of the house.
Intrigued, my heart pounding, I slowly crept forward, my shoulder brushing the wall. I knew Devan was supposed to be at work, but perhaps he’d come home early? The door was cracked open, and I was grateful for the music because it drowned out any noise I might have made. I shuffled to the door and peeked inside.
I could see Monique’s bare back with a sheet covering her rear end. She was sitting on top of Devan circling her hips, then lowering herself up and down on him. I bit my lip, and my nipples hardened as I watched them… imagining I was on top, with a mass of colour, Devan’s arms, wrapped around me.
Then Monique arched her back and moved enough that I could see the figure lying underneath her.
My stomach sank; I didn’t know who it was, but it sure wasn’t Devan. I should’ve realised straight away from the lack of tattoos on the man’s bare but fuzzy arms that it wasn’t Dev. I took a second look to make sure that I wasn’t hallucinating, but this man was blond, with longer hair.
Monique was having an affair.
I felt sick, and I walked quickly back down the hallway towards the rear of the house and ran back to my apartment.
The longer I thought about it, the angrier I got. Why did Monique want a baby with Devan if she was cheating on him?
And she had some nerve telling me I couldn’t have sex when she was apparently having sex with anyone she felt like. I had half a mind to go back into the house and confront her, but that would be catastrophic for both Devan and for me. I feared if I said one word to Monique, she’d kick me out of the apartment. I couldn’t risk it, not now that I couldn’t go back to my old apartment. I’d end up homeless…
But if I told Devan… Oh, god, Devan. His face flashed through my mind, and my heart just broke for him. Devan, who had been trying every way possible to save his marriage. Devan, who would do anything, including asking his stepsister to carry his child, to make his wife happy.
And the worst part was that I was absolutely dying for a cheeseburger with bacon right now and couldn’t have one. We’d signed the contracts, and everything was a go. I was officially a vegetarian.
I threw a pillow against the wall and grabbed a fruit bar from a basket Monique had brought up to my apartment “to help with the meat cravings”. I gobbled down the dry, sawdust-like fruit bar and then started on another, but I was the type of person who, when I wanted a certain food would stay hungry until I had that food, no matter how much other stuff I ate. I threw the remaining bar against the wall, and it landed with a soft thud on the pillow.
My phone pinged, and I grabbed it. It was Devan, saying he had set up a doctor’s appointment for me the next evening after work. This was the final step in the beginning of the process; once we got the go-ahead from the doctor that I was healthy enough to carry the baby, things would start moving fast. I would be pregnant within a few weeks, and then I wouldn’t be able to tell Devan anything about what Monique was doing. I knew my frustration, though, was not about burgers; it was about not being able to tell my brother that his wife was a fucking liar… a cheating, sly snake.
I just couldn’t be the one to break his heart.
8
Devan
I picked up Mila after she was done at work to take her to the clinic. I had butterflies in my stomach in anticipation of the exam and what the doctor would say.
Today’s exam was a pivotal part of the process, and I didn’t think Mila should go in by herself. I had asked Monique to go with her instead, but she had insisted I drive her there and be a part of the process. She was at work all day and couldn’t take any more time off. I had shrugged when she told me that and said no problem, though I wondered how things would be when we actually had the baby.