I wriggled out of my pants, kicking them off the bed.
He lay down over me, and we were completely naked against each other for the second time ever. I moaned, relishing the sensation of skin against skin. Fiery desires worked their way through my body. I wrapped my legs around him.
He was pressing against my stomach, dragging the length of his hardness over the softness of my belly.
“Are you okay?” I asked him.
He raised hooded eyes to mine. “I’m okay. Better than okay. Is this bothering you?”
I shook my head. Maybe I had been wrong earlier. Maybe it wasn’t better for me to take care of him. Maybe he needed to take the initiative. Maybe if things were in his hands, he’d feel more in control, not as if he were being forced or hurt. “Nothing you do bothers me.”
He buried his face in my neck, trailing a scalding line of kisses over my skin. I felt ablaze everywhere his skin touched mine, as if the two of us were catching fire. I clung to him, readjusting my legs so that I pulled him even tighter against me there.
He thrust again, but his thrust went lower than my belly. I was squirming under him, and I guess I was hard to pin down. He brushed me between my legs.
Sizzling thrills of pleasure went through me. I moaned, and I twisted my body, wanting him to rub me there again.
He did. I felt him slick and rigid, sliding over my sensitive skin.
And with his next thrust, he plunged inside of me.
We both cried out. Neither of us had quite expected it, I don’t think. He hadn’t planned it. I hadn’t been thinking of anything other than the fact he felt good.
He didn’t move for a minute. He rose up over me.
I gasped. He was filling me up, completing me, and it felt wonderful.
Our eyes met. He swallowed. I touched his face.
He kissed me. And he moved inside me, easing into rhythmic thrusts.
I sighed. His strokes were making something deep inside me smolder. Something exquisite and blissful was building.
He was still kissing me. His lips fluttered over my eyebrow, my cheekbone, my forehead. “Doll.” His voice was ragged. “You feel...”
“You feel amazing,” I said.
“I love you,” he heaved.
I undulated beneath him, joining his rhythm. “I love you.”
* * *
Later, we lay together, our bodies sweaty and spent. Griffin ran his fingers lazily over my arm and shoulder. My back was to his front—we were spooning.
“I didn’t think I could do that,” he said.
“You were actually very good at that,” I said. I liked the different way our voices sounded now—relaxed and lazy and dreamy. Every bit of fear or discomfort or shyness had been swept away.
He nuzzled the back of my neck. “It’s because of you, doll. Thank you.”
Why was he thanking me? “I didn’t do anything. I mean, it was an accident. We just ended up... you know.”
“Mmm,” he said. “A very nice accident.”
I snuggled into him, sighing. Content.
Neither of us spoke again for a while. There was nothing but the sound of our breathing, and we drew breath together, in the same rhythm. We would fall asleep now. And I’d wake up in his arms. We were connected now, bonded. I felt it, the invisible ties between us. I’d never felt something so strong before. Of course, I didn’t think I’d ever slept with someone for the first time after I was in love with him. And I hadn’t ever loved anyone quite the way I loved Griffin. It was intense and bright hot, like a raging fire. It consumed me.
Then I realized something. I tensed. “Shit.”
“What?” said Griffin. “What’s wrong?”
I twisted in his arms. “We didn’t use a condom. And I didn’t even think about it.”
“So what?” said Griffin, kissing my forehead.
“So what?” I said. “So what? So... what if one of us has AIDs? Or syphilis? Or herpes? I mean, thank God I’m on birth control, so we don’t have to worry about that, but—”
“Doll, calm down.”
I sat up. “I can’t. I mean, I could have AIDs. I could have just killed you.”