I followed him, closing the door behind me.
Griffin switched on the light. “Knox doesn’t mind. Do you, Knox?”
Knox was lying face up on one of the room’s two double beds. He was tied down, spread eagle, and he wasn’t wearing anything except a pair of boxers. His skin was covered in dried blood, but he didn’t seem to be hurt anywhere anymore. He’d healed, I supposed.
“Why isn’t he dressed, Griffin?” I said, feeling sick.
Griffin smiled at me. “Because not having clothes makes people feel vulnerable.” He looked at Knox. “Well, most people, anyway. Not Leigh here. She loves to take off her clothes for strangers.”
“Oh, for God’s sake,” I said. “I had nowhere to go, you jerk.”
Griffin ignored my outburst. He nudged Knox. “Knox was just telling me this morning about how he deserved everything I was doing to him. He said he hated himself for what he did to Beth, and that if I killed him, it would be too good for him, because he’d have peace. Weren’t you, Knox?”
Knox swallowed, looking terrified. “Griffin, you gotta believe me. I tried to stop Finn. I never wanted Beth to die. I wanted to help her.”
“But you didn’t help her,” said Griffin. “Did you?”
“No,” said Knox. “It was all my fault.”
“Sure as fuck was,” said Griffin. He pulled out a gun with a silencer and put it against Knox’s head. He pulled the trigger.
I looked away.
Griffin threw the gun on the other bed. “Except that’s not true. Not exactly. It’s partly my fault.”
Slowly, I raised my gaze to Knox. He was a bloody mess.
“He’ll be fine,” said Griffin. “He’ll heal up in an hour or so.” He ran a hand over his face. “Sometimes I’m not sure if I’m only hurting him the way I wish someone was hurting me.”
I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t stop looking at Knox’s ruined face. I backed up until I hit the wall. And then I hugged myself.
Griffin looked at me. “Damn it.”
“What?”
“It’s harder than I thought having you see me like this.”
“Don’t be like this then,” I said to him.
He crossed to me. He snapped my garter straps against my leg. “I don’t want you wearing this stuff anymore.”
“I don’t have anything else.”
“I’ll give you a pair of sweatpants,” he said. He got them out of his pack and handed them to me.
I started to go into the bathroom.
“Why is it a big deal to take it off in front of me? You were going to get totally naked in front of that whole room of people weren’t you?”
I looked at Knox.
“He’s dark,” said Griffin. “It’s like he’s not here.”
I tried to swallow, but my mouth was dry. “You want a strip tease, Griffin?” I raised my hand to the zipper of the hoodie.
He stopped me. “No.” He closed his eyes. “I’m sorry.” He rested his forehead against mine. “I’m sorry I left you. I’m sorry the money got stolen. I’m sorry you felt like you had to work at a strip club. I’m sorry I’m a complete asshole.”
I reached up to touch his cheek. His beard prickled my fingertips.
“I’m so sorry.” He let go of me and let me go into the bathroom to change.
When I came out, my feet were bare and Griffin’s sweatpants were pooling around my ankles. I had pulled the drawstring tight around my hips or they would be falling down. Griffin was bending over Knox. He was untying him.
“Griffin?”
He looked at me. “I think he’s telling the truth. I don’t think he wanted Beth to get hurt. He did kill Finn.” He went back to working at the knots. “He keeps saying he wants to help me take down Operation Wraith. After everything I’ve done to him, he keeps saying he wants to help me.”
I sat down on the bed. “You aren’t going to kill him?”
He let out a long, unsteady breath. “I don’t want to kill people. They’re the ones who wanted me to kill people.” He massaged the bridge of his nose. “I can’t stand the way you’ve been looking at me since we got in here. I don’t...”