He rolled his eyes. “Don’t be stupid, Leigh. The whole reason we were friends was to get in each other’s pants.”
I grimaced. “That wasn’t why I was your friend.” I headed for the door.
“Where you going?”
“Goodbye, Axel.” I strode through his apartment.
“Don’t go,” he called after me. “I was only trying to have fun. Geez, Leigh, when did you become so tight-assed?”
I let myself out.
And then I was alone again. I didn’t know what to do. I walked the streets, but it was dark now. And cold. So cold. I didn’t have a warm enough jacket. I huddled inside my thin coat, thinking of Stacey, thinking of my father, thinking of Jack. Everyone I cared about was dead. Or else they had turned out not to be worthy of my feelings for them. Like Axel. Or Griffin.
And my father was dead.
My father who’d never had time for me. Who’d never acknowledged me. Who’d pretended like I didn’t exist.
I missed him, and I’d never really known him.
It felt like the tears froze on my cheeks, even though I knew it wasn’t that cold outside.
Eventually, I ended up back on the T. Out of habit, I went the way I would have gone when I lived in Boston. Back to my dorm.
That was where Griffin found me.
He was at the station, watching people get off the T, and he ran at me the second he saw me. He grabbed me by the shoulders. “What the flying fuck?”
His gray eyes flashed. His teeth were clenched. He shook me, and I let him. “You idiot. You should never have come here. If I can find you here, then Op Wraith can find you here.”
I didn’t offer any resistance.
His hands moved from my shoulders to cup my face. “I didn’t know where you were. I was terrified.”
And then he was kissing me.
I wanted to melt and give in to it, let my knees buckle, let him support me. His lips were as sweet as they ever were.
But I didn’t respond. I stood stock still until he let me go.
“Doll?” he asked.
“Don’t call me that,” I said.
“What’s wrong?”
I laughed at that. “What’s wrong? You really are dim-witted.”
He let go of me. “Leigh, you run off for no reason, and then I go insane looking for you, and when I find you, you start insulting me. You’re trying my patience.”
“Well, we wouldn’t want to do that.”
He looked into my eyes. “Fuck. You’re high, aren’t you? You ran off to find drugs, didn’t you?”
I felt ashamed. “I didn’t mean to.”
It was his turn to be sarcastic. “Right. I’m sure you accidentally shoved it up your nose.”
“I was upset. And it was there.” I squeezed my eyes shut. “It’s your fault, anyway.”
“My fault?” He snorted.
“Don’t act innocent,” I said.
He sighed. “Let’s go.” He gestured to the T. “We’ll talk when we get somewhere private.”
“I don’t want to go anywhere with you.” But I didn’t know what I was going to do if I didn’t. “Maybe if you could just give me some money—”
“What?” He was confused. “Why are you acting like this?”
“You should have told me about Beth,” I said.
“Should I have?” he said.
“Yes. I was completely blindsided by her.”
“I don’t see why it’s important,” he said.
“You don’t see why...” I shook my head in disbelief. “You are more of a bastard than I could possibly imagine.”
He pointed at his own chest. “I’m a bastard?”
“Yes.”
“You mind telling me why?”
“Ha. You need it spelled out. After everything you’ve done to Beth.”
“What have I done to Beth?” He folded his arms over his chest. “I saved her life. I saved her baby’s life—”