“I totally understand,” I said. “I never believed Stacey anyway, you know? We don’t have to keep talking about this.”
“Right.” He looked at his hands.
I wasn’t sure where to look either. Things had gotten really awkward all of the sudden. I sat down. “So, what was my dad like, when you were spending time with him? Because I didn’t really see him much.”
“What do you mean, what was he like? He was freaked out. He was worried about you. He wanted you to be safe. You were all he talked about.”
“Really?” I said. “That’s funny. Because before that accident, he almost never talked to me at all.”
“That can’t be true. He was crazy about you.”
“When I was thirteen years old, my dad gave me a card wishing me a happy tenth birthday.”
Griffin winced. “That’s harsh.”
“He never came to see one of my school activities, like other parents did. By the time I was in high school, I stopped doing school activities. I figured, what was the point?”
“That when you started messing with drugs?”
“Yeah. It just didn’t seem like it was that big of a deal. And I didn’t think anyone would notice.”
“He did care about you, doll. I know that.”
I shrugged. “I wish he would have shown me that instead of you.”
“He risked everything to save your life.”
I realized I was crying again. Damn my dad. He didn’t deserve this many tears from me. I wiped my eyes with the heel of my hand. “Like you do. Because he asked you too. How can you be so loyal to him?”
He leaned back against the couch. “Look, I don’t want anything to happen to you.”
“Because of my dad. Yeah, we’ve established this.” Why were the tears coming faster now?
“Not just because of that.” He stood up and went to the window, putting his hands in his pockets. “I don’t want you to die. I mean, how could I sleep at night knowing there was a girl out there who was willing not to judge me about my past? She said I was a confused kid, not a criminal. And she had a big heart. She worked hard to change. She was willing to do whatever it took, even if she hated it. If I let a girl like that die, I’d never be able to live with myself.”
I went to him. I put my hand on his shoulder.
He closed his eyes.
“Griffin, that was the sweetest thing anyone has ever—”
He moved away from me. “I can’t, okay?”
Chapter Six
“So your dad seriously hired you a bodyguard?” said Stacey from the other stall in the clothing store.
“Seriously,” I said.
“Are you in that much danger?”
Griffin and I had talked about how to lie about this. “It’s my dad’s job. He works for an international arms corporation. He thinks I could be in danger.”
“Oh, whoa,” she said. “So, you might be.”
“Maybe,” I said. “Hopefully not.”
“And Griffin lives with you?”
“Well, he has to watch me.”
“All the time? Like while you’re in bed, too?”
I giggled. “Stacey, he can hear you.”
“I sleep on the couch,” said Griffin. He was outside the dressing room.
“He can always hear me,” she said. “He’s always around. How are we supposed to have a proper girly conversation about him behind his back, when he never turns his back?”
I laughed.
I could hear that Griffin was chuckling too.
“I’m serious,” she said. “You’re my best friend, or at least the closest thing to one I have since I got sober. And Griffin is ruining our ability to bond.”
“Well,” I said, “we can always go to the bathroom at the same time. He doesn’t come in women’s restrooms.”
“Perfect!” she said.
I surveyed myself in the mirror. “I don’t like this dress. I’m going to take it off.”