She’d stupidly allowed herself to hope that things could change between them, until he started acting weird straight after they’d had sex, like she’d wounded him somehow. It didn’t make sense, and she was done trying to figure him out.
Were you thinking when you started fucking your professor? A married man? Were you thinking then, baby girl?
A shudder moved through her.
That hurt. She hated herself for what she did. Knowing everyone else felt the same way…
“Lucy, goddamn, wait.” He grabbed her arm, pulling her to a stop.
“We don’t have time for this. You need to talk to the police and I’ll”—she spotted a hotel across the road—“I’ll go book us a room for the night.”
He seemed to relax a little, but his expression remained skeptical. “Okay. That’s…that’s a good idea.” He shoved his fingers through his hair. “I thought you were going to run off on me.”
She ignored the guilt swirling in her belly. She had nothing to feel guilty for. “The longer we stand here, the farther away your cousin’s car gets.”
His jaw jumped, like he was clenching his teeth.
“Don’t,” she said, stopping him before he could start on her again.
He cursed under his breath, but then lifted his hand toward her like he was going to touch her face. She pulled back before she knew she was going to do it.
“Luce…”
“I’ll see you in a bit, all right?” She turned and walked away before he could say another word, before he said something to change her mind. She’d made her decision. She wanted off this roller coaster ride. No way could she spend another night with him, acting like it meant nothing. That it was only about getting each other off. Friends with benefits. Screw that. Walking across the road to the hotel, she headed to the office and booked him a room. He’d be stuck there overnight for sure. Plus, he was probably watching her to make sure she did what she said.
“Where’s the bus station?” she asked the guy at reception when he handed her the key.
“Two blocks that way.” He pointed out the window.
“Thanks.” She quickly found Adam’s room. She had to at least leave him a note or he’d freak out and think she’d been kidnapped or something. It was cowardly of her, but she wasn’t brave enough to wait and talk to him. What was there to say? This whole thing had been one huge mistake.
Grabbing the pad and pen she’d found in the bedside drawer, she quickly penned a note, then got out of there before he showed up and she lost her nerve. This time she was ending things on her terms. For once she’d be in the driver’s seat. Her life had felt out of control for months. She didn’t want that anymore. She thought she wanted the old Lucy back, the one before her relationship with Daniel. She’d been wrong. That girl was gone, permanently, altered in a way that she would never be coming back. If she’d gotten anything from her time with Adam it was that.
The bus stop was easy enough to find, but the next headed to LA was an hour away. Thankfully, her wallet had been in her pocket at the lake, so she had money to buy a ticket. But her clothes and her phone were gone. In a weird way, it was kind of freeing. For the first time in months, she didn’t have to worry about never-ending texts, who they’d be from, what awful things would be there when she looked.
Taking a seat as far from the entrance as possible, she settled in to wait. Please let her be long gone before Adam discovered her note.
Time moved at a snail’s pace, or at least it seemed to, but finally her bus was called over the loudspeaker. The tension left her shoulders the minute she boarded and took her seat. She just wanted to go home and forget all about the last two days.
Forget the way Adam’s lips felt on hers, the way his whole body had trembled when he’d kissed her for the first time. The way his hands felt on her skin, his tall, solid body covering her, moving inside her.
She shivered. Don’t think about it.
That was going to be easier said than done. But whatever pain she was feeling was her own fault. She knew better. Had acted without thinking, just like Adam said. And now she’d pay for it. Her heart would pay for it.
The last passenger climbed on and the door shut with a whoosh.
She slumped in her seat. Everything was going to be okay. She’d find a job. Move out of the apartment above the garage and get on with her life.
Bang bang bang.
Lucy startled, jumping in her seat, and spun to look out the window. Oh shit. Adam was standing there, eyes blazing.
“Get off the damn bus,” he said.
The bus started up.
Shit. She shook her head. People around her were watching. She could hear them shuffling in their seats, feel their eyes burning into her.