Amy wanted to cry to think of young Dax with all that on his shoulders.
“Not to sound cold,” he went on, “but it made me ask, where’s the payoff? Relationships are a lot of responsibility.”
“But your parents seem to have such a good one.” Don’t you want that? she wanted to ask. She wanted that. Even though she was embarking on a mission to have a fling or two, she knew that someday she’d be on the hunt for lasting love again.
She sat up straighter, jarred by suddenly seeing his earlier point. They weren’t operating from the same assumptions. She did want love—someday. He did not.
Unfortunately, that knowledge didn’t make her lust after him any less.
He hopped off his stool. “Enough philosophy. Come to the island tomorrow. We’ll go canoeing.”
She stood, too, disoriented.
“It’s late,” he added.
Apparently she was being dismissed.
“Then we can head to my parents’ place together.” He nodded at the cheese. “You want a portion to go?”
All right. She could take a hint. She slung her purse over her shoulder. “No, but thanks. For the snacks and for…everything.” She stopped for a moment, considering what to say next, and surprised herself by deciding on the truth. “You pretty much salvaged my night.”
He grinned. “Well, right back at you. You saved me from The Godfather Part III.”
“Well.” She summoned a smile she feared appeared as weak and half-assed as it felt. “I may be a loser at both meaningful relationships and casual sex, but at least I’m good for something.”
There was that evil, slow grin again. It was as if they had never had the whole serious discussion about love and relationships and his college girlfriend.
He winked. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
…
Dax had pretty well decided to stop fighting himself by the time Amy knocked on his door the next morning. Last night, after she left, he’d started to allow himself to imagine the possibility. To envision trying again. She had said a million times she wasn’t looking for anything serious and, to his astonishment, had outright asked him for advice on how to do hookups. He, in turn, had made it abundantly clear that he was not relationship material. It felt like they’d laid all their cards on the table. Short of making her sign a waiver, he didn’t know how much more he could disaster-proof the situation.
So why continue to torture himself when it would be so easy for them both to get what they wanted?
When she stripped off a hoodie and threw it on his couch and he got a load of her red tank top—which matched her red lips—and her jean shorts, which managed to be both ratty and sexy simultaneously, that pretty much sealed the deal.
But first, canoeing.
“What I really want to do is go kayaking,” she said, slathering sunscreen on her arms. “You make it sound like the best.”
“I know. I just have to get my hands on a double kayak. I really think it’s better, your first time, not to go out on your own. There are some people I can borrow one from—not close neighbors, but people on the island. I promise I’ll track one down for next time.”
“So conscientious,” she teased.
“I’ve learned the hard way.” He smiled, thinking back to the disaster that had been Kat’s inaugural kayaking adventure. “The first time I took my sister out, she tipped over and then panicked because she couldn’t wiggle her way out. It was all fine, but I’m more careful now.”
“So, about Kat.” She took the life jacket he handed her and stepped outside. “In terms of her moving. I know what she says she wants, but…”
“But you want to know if what she says wants is really what she wants.” He nodded down the street, signaling the direction they should go. “Yeah, Kat can be so intense that it’s sometimes hard to know if she’s being reasonable or stubborn.”
“I don’t mean it as a criticism. She seems like a real go-getter, and that’s great, but sometimes people like that can be kind of…”
“Single-minded to a fault?” It was amazing how quickly and accurately she’d taken stock of his sister. “You’re not wrong. You should have seen the family dinner where she announced she was doing in vitro fertilization on her own.”
Amy laughed. “Oh my gosh. It’s like your mother’s fondest wish and her worst nightmare at the same time.”
“Exactly.” Damn, she had the Harrises completely figured out. “But once she calmed down and realized that this was probably her only hope for a grandchild, she mellowed. Anyway, in this case, I think her instincts are on. I see her in a small bungalow or something. I don’t think she’s going to have another kid, so probably she only needs two bedrooms. But who knows where to start in the crazy Toronto housing market?” He grinned, realizing what he’d just said. “Well, you do, obviously. So whatever help you can give her, I appreciate.”