Just then I hear Dad come in the front door, and I stumble back, hurrying to the kitchen. Jay follows me. When I step inside, Dad’s already saying hello to Jessie, who introduces herself as a friend of Jay’s. I dish up a plate of stir-fry for everyone, and we sit down to eat at the table, chatting about light topics.
After dinner Dad excuses himself to his room, where he plans to start reading the novel they’re discussing in his book club this month. Jay suggests the rest of us watch a movie in the living room. I go to change out of my work clothes while he and Jessie decide on a DVD.
When I come back down, they’ve selected a romantic comedy called Away We Go that I bought a couple of years ago when it first came out. I can’t remember it all too well, but I do recall it being about a couple who are expecting a baby. An odd choice for these two, but I go with it anyway.
Jessie is camped out on the armchair, so I sit next to Jay on the sofa, a nice safe distance between us. I hug a cushion to my chest as Jay presses “play” on the DVD. The film starts off with a quiet night time scene, and I relax into my seat. Unfortunately, my relaxation lasts about five seconds before I realise that the first scene is a sex scene. A scene where the man is going down on the woman, to be precise. Immediately, I can feel my cheeks heat up, even though it’s supposed to be kind of funny.
“Oh, now look at this,” says Jessie, pointing at the screen. “He’s doing it all wrong. He needs to take a few tips from me. I’m the queen of cunnilingus.”
Jay cocks an eyebrow at her and smirks, his arm resting behind me along the top of the couch. “I’d wager I’m better,” he says in a low, challenging voice.
Jessie snorts long and loud. “You wanna bet? I’d win hands down.”
Christ, could this conversation end, please?
“Okay, how are we going to play this? We need a judge,” says Jay, laughing, and I really hope he’s joking.
Jessie waggles her brow at me. “You want the position, Matilda?”
I practically choke on a cough. “I think I’ll have to decline.”
“Scared?” Jay asks, tilting his head to me with a wicked grin.
I get defensive. “No, I’m not scared. Besides, you need experience to be a judge….”
Oh, God, did I just say that? Where the hell is my filter?
“What?” Jessie spurts, practically jumping out of her seat. Suddenly, I’m regretting agreeing to watch a movie with these two. “Please tell me you’re joking!”
My face has become so red I might as well be a tomato. “Forget I said anything,” I mutter.
“Oh, my God, you’re not joking, are you?” she goes on.
I make the mistake of glancing at Jay, and his gaze is on fire. I play with the hem of my top and sigh. “No. I’ve only ever had one boyfriend, and, well, let’s just say he was kind of selfish in that department.”
“Asshole,” says Jay.
“Yeah, he was. So, no, I’ve no experience of that particular…act.”
“That’s a fucking travesty, hon. All girls need to get their vaginas licked. It’s like a rite of passage,” Jessie tells me with no embarrassment whatsoever.
I make a move to leave, but Jay grabs my wrist and pulls me back down, turning to face me properly. His eyes flick to Jessie as he warns sharply, “You don’t have to talk like that to her.”
“She’s not a child, Jay.”
“She’s not one of your fuck buddies, either, so try and keep it clean, yeah?”
I pull my wrist from his hold. “She can talk to me whatever way she likes. I just wish we could watch the film and stop discussing my sex life, or lack thereof.”
He raises his hands in the air. “Fine. Let’s watch it, then.”
There’s a couple of minutes of awkwardness before we all get into the storyline. In the end, it actually turns out to be really enjoyable, that uncomfortable first scene aside. Jessie leaves once it’s over, and I go to my room. I can hear Jay in his own room as I’m getting my clothes ready for work in the morning. It sounds like he’s pacing. A minute later, there’s a knock on my door.
“Come in,” I call, and Jay appears, stepping inside but leaving the door open behind him. Oh, yeah, and did I forget to mention that he’s topless? Topless! My eyes wander over his tattoos as I admire a particularly detailed one right over his heart. It looks a like a cubist painting, a box filled with triangles of all different colours. On the other side of his chest is a six of hearts card done in vibrant red and chalky white. Somebody’s definitely got a theme. Above the card is a quote: Do your worst, for I will do mine. Isn’t that from The Count of Monte Cristo?