“Please take the drugs.” He’d stopped commanding her a few hours back. It hadn’t worked. She’d snarled back at him and refused. She had a birth plan, she’d told him, and it didn’t involve drugs.
“Okay. I’ll take them,” she said, her voice a tortured whisper.
Thank god. He looked up at Naomi who was calmly writing in a chart. “She needs an epidural now. Call the anesthesiologist.”
He’d decided natural childbirth was for the birds. Rachel must have an unnaturally high tolerance for pain. Jennifer didn’t need to compete with her. Callie had been perfectly happy with her epidural. She’d started out with every intention of getting through it and four contractions in was screaming for drugs.
When Jennifer was relaxed and out of pain, maybe he would be able to breathe.
“Mr. Talbot, she’s at a nine. The time for an epidural has passed.” Naomi set aside the chart and gave Jennifer a friendly smile. “I’m sorry, honey, but it won’t be long now.”
“I hired an anesthesiologist to be on call.” He’d only agreed to her birth plan because he had a team on call. Jennifer had insisted the baby be born in Bliss and not in Del Norte, where the nearest full-service hospital was. Logan Talbot was going to be born in Bliss according to his momma, and that meant his father had to be prepared. He wasn’t about to let anyone ruin his plans. “I want him in here now. I want him doping her up and making her feel better and I want it right now.” He used his deep voice, the one that got people to do what he wanted.
It seemed no one had given Naomi the memo. She shrugged off his command. “I explained when she got to four centimeters that we didn’t have long. She’s too far in for an epidural now. Dr. Harris is still on call, but he’s only here in case she needs an emergency C-section, and it doesn’t look like that’s going to happen. She’s doing great.”
Jennifer’s body seized and she screamed again, reaching for his hand. He let her damn near break his bones as she rode out the wave of pain.
“Oh, god, it hurts.” She sobbed. “It hurts so much. I want to push. I want it to stop.”
Every word tore at his soul. Why had he ever thought this was a good idea? She was precious. He should never have put her through this. “I’m going to fix this.”
Naomi was moving to the end of the bed. “You do that, Mr. Talbot. Jennifer, I’m going to check you again. Don’t push yet.”
“I’ll take care of it, love. I’ll make this right.” He hated leaving her, but he had a job to do. He stepped out of the larger of the two patient rooms that Caleb had renovated in the last several months. The Bliss County Clinic now boasted a small emergency room, one operating room for the worst of emergencies, and two recovery rooms. And one very full waiting room.
“Hey, is she holding up okay, Stef?” Rye asked.
“She’s in pain. She needs drugs.” He looked around. Where the hell had Caleb gone?
Rachel was shaking her head. “See, I think woman should just get drugs the whole last month of their pregnancy.” She pointed at her slightly rounded belly. “This baby is getting drugs. And he’s not being born on a table at Stella’s. You know why? Because Stella doesn’t have any drugs. Caleb has drugs.”
Maybe his wife wasn’t so far behind in that particular competition. But that didn’t matter now. His eyes caught on Caleb as he walked into the waiting room wearing green scrubs. The man with the drugs. “Caleb, get in there and tell your nurse to call the anesthesiologist, or better yet, call him yourself. And then when you’re done, you can fire her because she doesn’t listen to orders.”
A brilliant smile crossed Caleb’s face. “Couldn’t get Naomi to do what you wanted, huh? That’s why she’s the best nurse I’ve ever had. And it’s too late for an epidural.”
“Goddamn it, Caleb, she’s in pain.”
“That’s what happens when you try to push a baby out of your body. I keep telling you people it’s a bad idea and you just keep on making kids.”
He wasn’t about to let this go. “Caleb, you owe me. You get my wife her drugs and maybe I won’t sue you for shooting me with a tranquilizer gun.”
Caleb shook his head sharply. “Look, I’m not sorry about that. You’ve been an ass. And no jury is going to convict me. As for the epidural, I could go into a lengthy medical explanation of why it’s a bad idea at this late stage of labor, but I’m just going to say no and leave it there.”
The door opened, and Naomi looked out. “Doc? She’s ready.”
Caleb slapped him on the shoulder. “Come on, Talbot. Let’s go and pull a tiny human being out of your wife’s vagina. Damn, I might still get a nap in today. Your son cost me a good night’s sleep, my friend.”
She was ready? Ready to have their baby? His heart seemed to slow down just when he thought it would go supersonic. He heard the people around him, his friends and family, wishing him well and cheering Jennifer on. Callie had tears in her eyes, and she hugged him briefly. She said something that was probably deeply meaningful, but it didn’t penetrate. The world seemed to have slowed to a sluggish crawl, and he couldn’t hear much past Caleb’s voice.
She was ready. He wasn’t ready. Not even close.
The door opened and Jennifer was already in stirrups, her legs spread in an odd facsimile of lovemaking—but this wasn’t sex. It was the product of sex. It was pain and work and creation and he had no real place here.
Jennifer screamed, her face red as she pushed.
Caleb looked between her legs and smiled. It was a surreal moment. He settled onto the stool at the foot of the bed. “There you go, Jen. You’re doing great. He’s crowning. Another couple like that and we’re all done here. Easy breezy.”
“Easy breezy, my ass, Caleb Burke. You try shoving a bowling ball through your hoo-haw.” Jennifer snarled his way.
Caleb just kept on smiling. “I have never in all my life been disappointed I was a guy. Stef, take her hand. She needs to break something. Let’s go.”
Another contraction seized his wife and he did as Caleb asked, feeling like a zombie the whole time. He wasn’t really here. It was a weird dream. Jennifer screamed as she pushed, squeezing his hand until he thought it would crack.
“Oh, there’s a boy. The head’s almost out, sweetheart. One more push should do it. Do you want to see, Stef? Miracle of life is right here,” Caleb offered.
The miracle of life was bloody and sweaty and he didn’t want to see a head coming out of his wife’s vagina. He clung to Jennifer’s hand. “I’m fine.”
He was so far from fine.
Jennifer turned her face up. “It’s okay, babe. Oh, god.”
She squeezed again, every muscle in her body tense as she pushed one last time. She relaxed suddenly, a bright smile on her face.
“Hello, Logan. Welcome to Bliss, son.” Caleb was holding something bloody and squirming in his hands. He handed the tiny thing to Naomi, who wrapped it in a blanket and started to coo. “Stef, come cut the cord.”
“No, I don’t want to do it. You do it.” He wasn’t a doctor. He might screw something up.
“Wimp.” Caleb placed a clamp in place and used the scissors and cut the cord that bound mother to child. “Show momma her baby boy and then we’ll get all the after parts done.”
“After parts?” That wasn’t the worst of it?
“It’s nothing,” Caleb said. “Just some afterbirth. As in everything having to do with this process, Jen is going to do all the hard work. You just hold that baby.”
“He’s not crying,” Jennifer said, sitting up a little.
Naomi was right there, placing the baby boy on the nursery station. “Because he doesn’t have anything to cry about. He’s perfect, Jen. Apgar of nine. He’s seven pounds nine ounces of pure Bliss baby boy.”
Jennifer held the bundle in her arms, her eyes wide with wonder as she stared down at the baby they had made together. “Hello, Logan. Oh, Stef, he’s perfect. He looks just like you. He has your hair.”
But Stef held back. He couldn’t feel anything—just a numb awareness that he was glad this part was over. Jennifer seemed fine. The baby seemed fine. And Stef just felt numb.
Jennifer looked up at him. “Hold him, Stef.”
She thrust the little bundle at him. It was too small for his hands. He would fumble. His wife would kill him if he dropped their son. She’d just worked so hard to bring him here.
He had a son and he still felt numb. Julian had told him he would feel something but he just felt nervous about Jennifer yelling at him if he dropped the baby.
There had been no grand revelation. No magical waterfall of feelings had rained down on him. He was just tired, and he wanted to make sure his wife was all right.
He held the baby close to his body because it seemed like the best way to not drop it. Him. He had to start referring to the baby as him. Although Caleb was really bad at reading sonograms. It wouldn’t be the first time. “Is it really a boy?”
Jennifer frowned. “Yes, Logan’s a boy. You weren’t watching?”