“I can’t let you just walk away, Shady. And for that I apologize,” Jimbo says, narrowing his eyes on me. “But, however . . .” He offers me a smile, looking around the circle at the other members. “I can put you on an undetermined, extended medical leave.” Leaning closer, he grabs my good shoulder, bringing his face level with mine. “This is my gift to you, brother.”
I bite my lip, drawing my eyebrows together in an attempt to control my emotions. My eyes burn, begging me to allow the tears building in them to release. This is family. This is brotherhood. This is Sinner’s Creed.
Standing, I embrace Jimbo in a hug, silently thanking him for giving me a chance at a life most of us only dream of. A life Dirk dreamed of. One by one, my brothers hug me, kiss me, tell me how much I’ll be missed and how proud they were to serve beside me. I brush the tears from my cheeks with the back of my hand, finally losing the battle with my emotions.
There are no words to describe the feeling I have. I’m happy and sad at the same time. I’m excited and scared. I’m saying good-bye to the only thing I’ve ever known, and walking into a world that I never thought I’d see. I turn to Rookie, knowing that I have him to thank for all of this. He’d planted the seed. He was the one who fought the battle with Nationals so I didn’t have to. I’d once told Diem that Rookie was the one who’d look out for me. And today, he’d proved it.
“I need you on one final ride, Shady,” Chaps informs me, his hand on the back of my neck pulling me closer. “Houston needs their bottom rockers. And you’re the only man that can give it back to them.”
I nod, my heart breaking a little knowing that this will be the last time I’ll ever ride with a patch. The last time I’ll ever be a part of the greatest brotherhood I’ve ever known. The last ride with Sinner’s Creed—and the first ride of the rest of my life.
I decline the offer of a farewell party in fear of me changing my mind if I stayed any longer. Right now, I need to be with the reason I’m leaving all this behind. I need to be with Diem.
She’s laughing when I approach her, but immediately stops when she notices me. Her eyes search my face for a clue. Then my body for more bullet holes. Then they widen with excitement when I smirk. I hold her face in my hand, kissing her deep as the bar erupts in applause, whistles, and catcalls. My heart beats—for her. My blood pumps—for her. I breathe—for her. My reason. My purpose. My Diem. To me, she is worth it all. And I’ll spend every day loving her like it was my last.
There would always be a special place in my heart for Sinner’s Creed—but there would never be a void. She captivated me. She owned me. And everything I’ve been searching for, I finally have. Leaving the club wasn’t a loss—because with her, I had so much more to gain.
* * *
My bike is at Dirk’s, so Rookie, Carrie, Diem, and I take a car to his house. Soon, the place is alive with laughter and talk just like it was on the last night Dirk and Saylor were here. The mood isn’t melancholy, and there isn’t ache in my chest at the lack of his presence. Somehow, I feel like he’s here with us.
“I have to make one last run before we leave,” I tell Diem, knowing I can’t keep it from her any longer. We’re all in the living room, which grows completely silent at my announcement. “Just down to Houston. I’ll be back in a few days.”
“How long will it take once you get there?” she asks, her mood a cross between pissy and sad. I’m hoping she stays pissy. Between her tears and mine, we could fill the Mississippi.
“An hour, tops.”
“So just fly there and I’ll wait in the car.”
I smile at her solution. “I think this is one ride I want to take.” I look in her eyes, begging her to understand how much I need this.
“Okay, fine.” She shrugs, crossing her arms over her chest. “I’m going with you.” Hell, no.
“I don’t think so, princess. We’re talking a twenty-five-hour trip. Tell her, Rookie.” I look over at him, already nodding my head in agreement with what he says.
“I choose my battles, Shady. And this ain’t one of ’em.” He holds his hands up in surrender.
“Well if Diem goes, I’m going,” Carrie adds, straightening her spine and looking at Rookie. I give him the finger. Serves the fucker right. He looks at the ceiling, shaking his head.
“Having visions of choking Diem?” I ask. “Don’t worry, I get them aaaall the time.”
“We’re fucking going. And that’s final.” Diem gives me a challenging look. One that tells me I won’t be winning this fight. Fucking women. And here I was throwing my life away for one. And not even a nice one. A vindictive, bossy, bitchy one.