I roll my eyes. “I don’t know. He lives back in Georgia, but my father said he might come and visit in a few weeks so that we can get to know each other.”
“Sounds like a halfway decent idea before you commit to being with someone for the rest of your life.”
I nod, frowning at the ground.
“You okay?”
“Yeah, it’s just,” I shrug.
“What.”
“Nothing.”
“If you say so.”
“He’s a little older, and he’s actually been married before.”
Rowan’s brow shoots up. “How much older?”
“Thirty-seven?”
“Damn.”
“Hey, you’re like thirty.”
He grins. “Thanks for the reminder. Thirty-one, actually, but I act like I’m twelve so it’s fine.”
I grin.
“Plus, I’m not marrying you.”
I blush. “No, you’re not.”
“I thought you said this Milton character was a good upstanding guy.”
“He is, I just- I don’t know. I’m bad with this sort of thing.”
“What, marriage?”
I smile. “No, I mean relationships in general I guess.”
“You were engaged.”
“Yeah but, I don’t know.”
I can’t tell him this. No way. I can’t tell him what I’m really worried about. Telling a man like Rowan Hammond that would be like throwing lambs to the wolves.
And I’m the lamb.
“That was different, I guess.”
“How so?”
“It’s just that Milton has been married before, you know? He’s…been with another woman.”
“Can I let you in on a little secret?”
I nod. “Sure?”
“You’re hot.”
I blush bright red and quickly look at the ground.
“You’re hot, you’re young, and trust me, you’re going to blow his fucking mind. Don’t let the idea of Jebediah, or whatever his name was, leaving you throw you off.”
“Joseph.”
“Whatever. Look, whatever worked with him is going to knock old Milton on his ass, I promise.”
“Whatever worked?”
“In the sack.”
A fresh wave of heat washes over my face. “Right, well-”
“Seriously, trust me as a guy on this one. Whatever hot moves you used before are going to be great.”
“I don’t uh,” I clear my throat and drag my bare toe through the grass under my feet. “I don’t really have any hot moves.”
I can’t believe I’m having this conversation. With him of all people.
Rowan laughs. “I’m sure you do. Look, you don’t have to bust out the gymnastics or the kinky toys, just do what comes natural.”
“Yeah, um-”
“Figure out what he likes, show him what you’re into. Missionary? Doggy? Cowgirl? Shit, try ‘em all and see what-”
“Yeah, I don’t know.”
“Eva I’m telling you, whatever sex stuff worked with Joseph will work with-”
“We didn’t do anything,” I blurt out.
My lips snap shut immediately after, and my hand flies to my mouth.
“What?”
“Nothing.”
“No, what do you mean?”
“I- I don’t know any sex stuff, okay?”
“You were engaged.”
“Yeah, well…I- we, I mean, you know.”
He raises a brow.
“You’re supposed to wait, and all that.” My face is burning as I say it quietly.
Rowan goes quiet. “Wait, are you-” I look up pathetically and his eyes go wide. “Awww no way!” He stares at me. “You’re what, twenty-one?”
I nod, cringing and dropping my eyes to the grass under my feet.
God, why did I just tell him this?
“Seriously? How is that even possible?”
I snap as I glare back at him. “Well you don’t have to be an asshole about it! What’s the big deal?!”
“Hey, hey, okay.” He holds his hands up. “Okay, it’s cool.”
I deflate instantly, my shoulders slumping as the anger turns back into embarrassment. “It’s not cool.”
“Nah, it is.”
“Rowan, I’m from a religious family but I’m not clueless, okay? I get that it’s weird.”
“Says who?”
I groan. “Everyone?”
“Fuck ‘em.” He chuckles. “Well, or don’t, in your case.”
I groan.
“Seriously, I think it’s cool.”
“You’re making fun of me.”
“I swear, I’m not.” His arm suddenly moves over my shoulder, and I shiver against him. “Well, maybe not cool like Rolling Stones cool, but you know, interesting.”