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Sinner(175)

By:Aubrey Irons


My shoulders droop as I reach for one of the big green avocados, hefting it and smiling softly at the memory of taco night with Landon and Emily. The grin grows wider as the memories of that night come back to me - the laughter, the feeling of being part of something as fun and as wonderful as that two-person team of those two. I remember feeling warmth, the happiness, and the closeness of it all.

The love.

The smile fades from my face as I stare at the fruit in my hand, and I’m about to put it back when the voice comes from behind me.

“Oh, yeah, don’t get that one.”

I freeze.

“That one’s no good. Not if you’re trying to make guacamole. Or at least, that’s what I hear.”

I swallow the lump in my throat as I slowly turn slowly. The bag drops to my feet, scattering veggies and whole-wheat English muffins, and my hand flies to my mouth at the sight of them.

Both of them.

“Hi, Serena,” Emily says shyly, biting her lip and smiling at me from her dad’s side.

“Hi, Emily.” I grin at her before dragging my eyes higher, until they lock on his.

Landon.

“We just flew here!” Emily chirps.

Landon and I just lock eyes, not even blinking, and not saying a thing until I somehow start to open my mouth and make sounds.

“What are you-”

“Well, here’s the deal. We had this awesome taco night planned, but the guac situation was garbage. Right?”

He nudges Emily, who quickly nods her head. “Oh, yeah, it was garbage,” she parrots.

I glance back up at him, seeing that grin barely creeping at the corners of his lips, those eyes twinkling at me. “You know anywhere around here we could get some decent stuff? I hear Texas makes it pretty good.”

He levels his eyes at me, and I’m instantly caught up in them.

“Landon, what are you-”

“I think we’ve been over this. Decent guac. Honestly, it’s terrible up there in Denver.” He nods at the avocado in my hand. “But like I was saying, you don’t want that one.”

I raise a brow. “Oh?”

“Yeah, no, that one’s no good.”

I hold his eye, my cheeks pulling my lips into a half-smile as I cross my arms over my chest. “And why’s that?”

“I just don’t think that avocado has what’s best for you in mind.”

I laugh. “Oh really?”

“Not at all. You see, that avocado just feels right at the moment, because it’s familiar. You’ve seen it at this farmer’s market a couple dozen times, and even though I know you know it’s not the one for you, I can tell you’re thinking about just playing it safe and going with it. Because it’s familiar.”

“I see.” I heft the fruit in my hand, eyeing him. “And do you have a better one?”

“Yeah, I do,” he says quietly, stepping closer to me. “See, I’ve got one for you that sees you for exactly who you are. I’ve got one that accepts every gorgeous smile and every graceful step, right along with every broken past and every scar. Mine is a little different, and it comes with its own baggage and history and scars, and it doesn’t actually live here.”

I start to grin.

“But my avocado really doesn’t want you to take off again without it. Mine really wants you to stay, and give it a second chance.” He sighs, his eyes searching my face.

“Mine never saw you coming, Serena,” he says softly. His hand finds mine, fingers interlacing. “And I can promise you, it never wants to see you leave. Not ever.”

I can feel my heart thumping in my chest, my breath coming quick and deep. My eyes dart over his face, finding his eyes and locking there.

Green on green.

Green like mine.

Green that looks right into me and sees me.

“You came a really long way to talk to me about avocados, you know.”

“I have very strong opinions where they’re concerned,” he whispers as he yanks me close. I let the avocado in my hand drop.

“Serena, I came here to tell you that I’m sorry. I came here to tell you that you’re like nothing I’ve ever known before, and even though I never saw you coming, now that you’re here, I literally can’t imagine a day without you in my life.” He glances down at Emily, her big brown eyes shining up at the two of us.

“Both of our lives, actually,” he murmurs.

“Landon-”

“Look, I know you probably at least half hate me for keeping all that from you. And I know you probably want nothing to do with Denver, or me, or any of this, but the problem is, I don’t know how to quit. And I don’t know how to let you walk away without putting up a fight. Because somehow, you got through every single barricade I put up. You got past every single wall I built, and saw past every single excuse. You made me break every single rule I have.”