Sinful Nights(55)

 



 

Lissa.' He said her name in a thickly unfamiliar voice. Do that  again,' he commanded, moving so that her mouth was pressed against his  shoulder. A deep shudder ran right through him as she automatically  complied, touching his skin with her tongue with nervous delicacy,  stunned that such a brief physical contact should apparently have so  much power to move him. His hand found her breast, his thumb rubbing  urgently against her swollen nipple. Lissa forgot that he didn't love  her, silencing her moan of anguished desire against the warm flesh of  his throat. She felt his body surge against her own and recklessly  arched up against him prolonging the tingling contact. Joel bent his  head, his mouth fiercely claiming the aroused peak of her breast, his  fingers caressing its twin.

Lissa arched and writhed beneath him, her nails raking helplessly  against his skin, desire exploding tumultuously inside her as Joel  continued to arouse spirals of unbearable delight inside her, tiny darts  of fire running shuddering through her body from its point of contact  with the fierce heat of his mouth.

You're my wife, Lissa.' He said it thickly, against her skin, whether  as a reminder that he had every right to make love to her if he chose,  or as an explanation for the fact that he was doing so, she didn't know.  She ought to stop him, to remind him that he didn't love her, but her  treacherous body ached too much for the sweet agony of consummation.  When he removed the rest of their clothing she didn't stop him, simply  watching him silently. Shadows made a subtle play of shading against his  skin, one moment soft gold the next bronze. She ached to touch him  Lissa acknowledged, watching him as he bent over her, removing her  underclothes.

A slight shiver ran through her as his hand brushed her hip.

Cold?'

She shook her head as his hand curled round the spot he had just  touched. He was kneeling beside her, and when she first felt the light  brush of his tongue where his hand had rested she thought she must be  imagining it. Her head lifted and swivelled round and she gasped as she  felt the brief caress again. Her skin quivered responsively where he had  touched it, darting quick-silver thrills of pleasure running from nerve  ending to nerve ending. She could hardly believe it when Joel bent his  head and slowly started to drag his tongue over the slight swell of her  stomach. She jerked away from him in helpless torment, but he imprisoned  her against the bed, his hands holding the narrow bones of her hips,  while his tongue left quivering trails of moist destruction over her  skin.

Lissa was completely powerless to stop him, and after a while she no  longer wanted to try, held thrall to the swift, leaping fires of  pleasure that burned inside her. At first she twisted helplessly from  side to side as much in an attempt to escape the devastation of her  senses as to avoid Joel's skilfully delicate touch, but all her  struggles seemed to do was to give him access to areas of her skin that  seemed even more responsive to him than the others had been.

Joel what are you dong?' she managed to demand huskily at one point,  tensing agonisingly as his tongue described a slow circle round her  navel and then dipped tormentingly to explore its slight indentation.

Just trying to keep you warm,' he replied suavely, you are getting warm aren't you Lissa?' he tormented softly.

Warm? She was burning up, her skin on fire.

By the time Joel's slow devastation of her body had reached her breasts  she was shivering helplessly, aching for the full consummation of his  possession. He kissed the tender fullness of their curves with  mind-destroying slowness until Lissa couldn't hold back the fevered  protest that left her lips. Once that final wall in her defences had  been breached she couldn't keep silent her agonised pleas for him to end  her torment, shattering the thick silence of the night, until Joel  reached up and silenced her by pressing his finger against her mouth.  Her lips parted, her tongue running frantically over the tips of his  fingers, until driven half mad by the slow drift of his mouth against  her breast she sucked feverishly on his fingers.

Dimly she was aware of Joel groaning, of him shifting his weight so that  his body lay between her thighs, his lips exploring her throat, in  between muttering hoarse words of praise and enticement against her  skin. He withdrew his fingers from her mouth, brushing the outline of  her lips with his thumb, lifting his head to look deeply into her eyes,  his hands moving slowly down over her body, lifting it into his own.

Lissa shivered, trembling with aching desire. Tell me you want me more  than you wanted him,' Joel demanded softly, watching her.

For a moment Lissa's mind was completely blank, and then when she  realised the truth she could have wept with anguish. Joel had done this  to her, aroused her to a pitch where her need for him was a throbbing  ache that threatened to consume her, simply because his pride demanded  that she want him more than she wanted Simon. If only he knew!    

 



 

Tell me!'

His face blurred for a moment as she blinked away tears. I want you  more than I want Simon, Joel,' she said shakily at last. Much more.'

It was after all no less than the truth, and what he had done to her  diminished him as much as it did her. Her body which had ached and  hungered for his possession felt curiously drained of all feeling as he  moved slowly and skilfully within her, rather like an overwound toy that  was now broken, Lissa thought hazily, conscious of an overwhelming  desire to break down and cry. Where she had ached for physical  fulfilment now she ached for an emotional commitment to match her own.  She heard Joel swear and then withdraw from her, but she was feeling too  numb and lacerated to react.

Lissa  …  what's wrong?' There was a raw uncertainty in Joel's voice that  made her want to reach out and comfort him, but something stopped her.  Joel didn't want her, he wanted Marisa. She felt her heart harden and  shrink into a block of ice.

Lissa!'

The tone of his voice demanded a response, but all she could manage was a  flat, Using substitutes doesn't seem to work, does it, Joel?' before  she slid down into a yawning black void of nothingness.





CHAPTER NINE


SHE WAS VIOLENTLY ILL when she woke up in the morning-a sure sign that  she must have eaten something that disagreed with her, Lissa thought as  she washed and dressed.

Joel was up already, and mentally thanking God that she did not have to  face him she made her way downstairs. They could not go on the way they  were, last night had shown her that. What had happened to the  compassionate tender man she had briefly known? She went into the  kitchen, grimacing when she caught the smell of bacon and eggs.

Mrs Fuller looked at her in concern.

Are you all right?'

Just a little queasy,' Lissa explained. Something I ate, I expect.'

The housekeeper grinned at her. If you say so.'

It was several seconds before the import of her teasing remark sank into  Lissa's consciousness. When it did, she went pale and sat down heavily  on one of the chairs, staring blankly at the wall. Dear God, she hadn't  thought of that! What if she should be pregnant?

Impossible! Hardly, an inner voice taunted her-in fact it was all too  probable. She had simply never thought about using any form of birth  control. It had never been necessary. While she was trying to come to  terms with her shock, Joel and the girls walked in. All three of them  looked healthily windblown, their cheeks glowing, Emma on Joel's  shoulder, while Louise clung to his hand.

Joel said we were to let you rest,' Louise announced, releasing Joel to  run over to Lissa, clambering on to her knee and cuddling into her. She  was discovering in her elder niece a very deep need to exhibit her  affections physically, and Lissa responded to her unspoken plea for  reassurance, hugging and kissing her.

We went for a walk,' Emma announced as Joel placed her in her high chair.

Mrs Fuller served them breakfast, and Lissa felt relieved when she was  simply given two slices of dried toast. Joel raised his eyebrows.

I'm not hungry,' Lissa told him hastily, avoiding his eyes, and  grateful for the housekeeper when she kept silent, merely exchanging a  thoughtful glance with her over Joel's downbent head. She had dreaded  facing him this morning after the way she was sure she must have  betrayed herself to him last night, but now she had something even more  worrying on her mind. What on earth would she do if she was pregnant?

Stop thinking about it, she cautioned herself, it's probably nothing  …   too much rich food last night. She ought to have been reassured, but  somehow she was not.

When he looked at her again there was a strange bitter tension in his  eyes, a tightness to his mouth that took her back to that night almost  ten years ago. Unknowingly she flinched, pushing her plate away,  shivering slightly, aware of Joel getting up and coming towards her, and  almost cringing away from him as he did so. How could she bear to have  him touch her now when she knew that every time he did, it was another  woman he had in his heart.

The phone rang shrilly, the sound harsh and challenging. Joel frowned,  glanced at her, and then walked across the kitchen to pick up the  receiver. Once he had moved away from her Lissa was conscious of an  easing of the constriction in her muscles. Louise and Emma were both far  too young yet to be aware of the strained atmosphere between the  adults, but Mrs Fuller must have noticed it. If only she had known about  Marisa before she agreed to marry Joel! Even loving him as she now  admitted she did, she would not have done so. While she had thought  there was no other woman in his life she had hoped, ridiculously no  doubt, that somehow a miracle would occur and Joel would eventually turn  to her with more than mere physical desire and compassion.