I do love him,' she told him, avoiding the question.
And obviously sexually you're extremely compatible,' Alan shocked her by saying. Come on, Sapphire, I'm not a complete fool,' he told her roughly, when a man comes down for breakfast, looking like a well-fed predator, it isn't hard to guess what's put the smile on his face.'
She wanted to protest that he was wrong, but sensibly did not. Perhaps it might make it easier for Alan to accept the situation if he believed that she and Blake were lovers. Sadly she knew that their friendship was now over, and that once she and Blake had parted there could be no going back to Alan. She would miss him as one always missed good friends, but she did not love him, she acknowledged, her feelings from him came nowhere near to those she felt for Blake.
After he had breakfast Alan insisted on leaving. When he had gone Sapphire felt restless. On impulse she decided to go out for a walk, glimpsing Blake working in one of the snow-covered fields-just a small dark figure by a Land Rover, with something familiar in his stance that tugged at her heart.
Shivering in the cold wind she walked back to the house, still too restless to settle. She would go and see her father; she decided visiting him might help to keep her mind off her own problems.
Flaws farmyard was deserted when she drove in. Someone had cleared the worst of the snow away, and although the kitchen was redolent with the yeasty smell of baking there was no sign of Mary.
Terror, sharp and paralysing, gripped her for a second, a dreadful vision of her father, motionless, dying, rising up before her. The vision cleared and she hurried upstairs, her heart thumping; her pulses racing in aching fear as she pushed open the door to her father's room and came to a full stop.
Far from lying close to death's door on his bed her father was standing by the window, dressed in a pair of disreputable old trousers and a thick woollen jumper. He looked thinner than Sapphire remembered, but otherwise he was still very much the father of her late teens, his weatherbeaten face turned towards the window, his eyes on the distant snow-covered line of hills.
Back already,' he commented without looking round. I'll just have a cup of coffee Mary and then … ' He turned and saw Sapphire, shock and something else she couldn't understand leaping to life in his eyes.
Sapphire!'
The room started to tilt and spin and Sapphire heard a roaring sound in her ears, increasing in volume until it drowned out everything else. Dimly she was aware of her father calling for Mary, of blackness coming down over her, and then a thick, suffocating darkness that seemed to press down all around her.
When she opened her eyes she was sitting in her father's chair, Mary standing anxiously at her side.
My, you gave us all a shock fainting like that,' she told Sapphire worriedly. Are you all right now?'
Dad … ' Sapphire croaked unevenly, when I came in and everywhere was so quiet, I thought … '
Shock, and something else she couldn't name shadowed Mary's eyes. She was about to speak when the door opened and her father walked in. Walked in, Sapphire noted dazedly, carrying a mug of tea.
Come on, drink this,' Mary instructed her. It will help allay the shock.' The phone started to ring and as Sapphire took the mug from her father Mary said briskly, I'd better go down and answer that.'
When she had gone Sapphire looked at her father. Sorry about this,' she apologised huskily, but you gave me such a shock … '
Aye, I'm sorry too, lass.' Her father looked sad and disturbed. I thought … ' He shook his head. No, we won't talk about it now, Sapphire. You're in no fit state. You stay here and rest for a while and I'll … '
He broke off as Mary came in her round face creased into a thoughtful frown.
That was Blake,' she told them both. In a rare old state, wanting to know if we'd seen anything of you.' She looked at Sapphire and smiled. That must have been some spat the two of you had to generate so much concern, and the pair of you not a week reconciled yet.'
Knowing that her father was watching her Sapphire summoned a light smile. Blake wasn't too pleased when Alan turned up last night,' she told them, hoping she would be forgiven her small fib, but not wanting to let them guess at the real state of affairs between herself and Blake.
Jealous, was he?' her father laughed. Aye well, I suppose it's my fault for sending the laddie over to you, but I thought it best.'
He's gone now,' Sapphire told them, and explained briefly.
I'd better get back,' she told her father. She couldn't put off facing Blake for ever. From somewhere she would have to find the determination to remind him that their marriage was a strictly platonic one. Not that he could really want her, she reminded herself bitterly.
You stay right here,' Mary scolded her. You're in no fit state to be driving after that faint. Blake's coming to take you home. He's getting one of the men to drive him over in the Land Rover. He'll be here in ten minutes or so.'
Shakily Sapphire drank her tea. Why had Blake rung Flaws Farm? Had he perhaps gone back the house this morning and wondered where she was? She frowned, and then tensed as she heard the familiar sound of a Land Rover engine.
Here he is now,' Mary announced going to look out of the window. I'll go down and tell him where we are. No, don't you get up,' she told Sapphire sternly. I'm not too happy about that faint of yours. You must try and take things easy for a few days. Put on a few pounds, perhaps. I know it's fashionable to be slim but you seem to have been overdoing things.'
Now she's back with Blake, she'll soon fatten up a bit,' her father prophesied. There's nothing like a happy marriage.'
Sighing Sapphire turned her face away. What would her father say if he knew the truth? But he mustn't know the truth, she thought in panic. She could already see the effect their re-marriage had had on his health; he was marvellously improved. It couldn't last for long of course, but she daren't take the risk of him discovering the truth.
She heard Mary go downstairs and then return several minutes later accompanied by Blake. Where earlier she had been shocked to see how much healthier her father had appeared than she had anticipated, now she was equally startled by the pallor of Blake's skin and the tense, bitter, brooding darkness of his eyes.
Mary tells me you fainted.' His voice was almost accusatory.
"It was just the shock of finding Dad out of bed,' she told him knowing how feeble her explanation sounded, but not able to tell him in front of her father of her fears when she had entered the strangely silent house.
She started to get out of the chair, but Blake forestalled her, striding over and bending to pick her up, ignoring her protests.
Let him carry you,' Mary placated. I don't want you falling down those steep stairs. No, she's perfectly all right,' she told Blake who had turned to question her, she just needs to rest a little and get her strength back.'
When he had installed her in the passenger seat of his car Blake started the engine, his face grim as he drove the car out of the cobbled yard.
What did you want me for?' Sapphire ventured once they were out on the road. You rang Mary to find out if I was there,' she pressed when he turned to frown at her. You must have wanted me for something … '
When I went back to the house and found you missing,' Blake told her harshly, it struck me that you might have decided to renege on our bargain.'
It took several seconds for the words to sink in. You mean you thought I had left with Alan?' Sapphire said incredulously, But … '
But he wouldn't take you, believing that you and I are lovers?' There was a cynically bitter twist to Blake's mouth, his eyes as hard and cold as the snow-encrusted stone walls they were driving past.
No! I … ' Oh, what was the use trying to get through to him when he was in this sort of mood, Sapphire thought despairingly. Reaction from her faint had started to set in. She felt sick and tense; in no condition to cope with Blake's biting sarcasm. This was the Blake she remembered, she thought miserably; this hard, cynical man who seemed to be driven by demons she could not comprehend; who seemed to take pleasure in humiliating her.
The moment the car stopped outside the backdoor, she reached for her seatbelt, but Blake was too quick for her, moving swiftly round to her door, and lifting her out of her seat, even as she protested that she could manage.
What made you faint, Sapphire?' he demanded as he carried her upstairs to their room. No wonder you put up so little fight when I suggested we re-marry. But you weren't completely truthful with me were you? What happened? Wouldn't he marry you when he knew that you were carrying his child?'
She was too stunned to answer him. He dropped her unceremoniously on the bed, where she simply lay, staring at him.
Oh, I confess you had me nicely fooled,' Blake said bitterly. It never occurred to me that you … We can hardly have our marriage annulled now,' he continued sardonically, and that being the case … '