I watched as it sunk in and waited for a blow-up. His fingers flexed on the table.
“Is there someone else?”
For a brief second, I considered lying to him, but then realized I'd be doing exactly what I'd accused him of doing. It'd hurt for him to hear the truth, but it would be worse if he found out I'd lied.
“There is,” I confirmed.
A shadow passed across his face. “Who?”
“It doesn't matter.” He'd find out soon enough. I had no doubt the gossip mongers would have a field day with this one. “But I know he and I are supposed to be together.” I wanted to apologize again, but refrained. I hadn't cheated on Reed or led him on. I felt bad that he was hurting, but he pain couldn’t become my responsibility.
After another minute of silence, he let out a slow breath. “Okay,” he said. His eyes met mine. “I hope he knows how lucky he is.”
I smiled. I couldn't help it. “We both do.”
He drained his coffee while I tried to figure out something to say. Unfortunately, I blurted out the first thing that came into my head without thinking about whether or not it was appropriate.
“Are you going to try to work things out with Britni?” I slapped my hand over my mouth. “Shit. I'm sorry. That was completely out of line. It's none of my business. I'm so sorry.”
He held up a hand, the corners of his mouth twitching with humor. I had a flash of memory about what it had felt like to have those lips on mine, moving over my skin. There was fondness to the memory, but no heat, confirming what I'd told him. My feelings for him were platonic.
“It's okay,” he said. “And the answer's no. I'm through letting other people dictate my life.” He gave me a sad look. “It's already cost me too much.”
He didn't have to tell me what he was thinking at that moment because my mind was already there. How different things might've turned out if he'd made that decision earlier. If he'd broken up with Britni before his bachelor party, would he have forgotten about me and our little tryst, or would he have tried to find me? If he'd followed through with it when we'd been in Vegas, would he have asked me to come back to Philadelphia with him? Would I, instead of planning a date with Julien this weekend, be looking forward to spending Christmas with the Stirlings, perhaps wondering if it was too early to be thinking about a ring?
I didn't like where that train of thought was taking me. I asked another question, “What about the family business?”
“Rebecca,” he said. “My parents are pissed enough at me that they're going to let her be in charge, even though they'd always said she wasn't cut out for business. I just hope the people in the company aren't going to suffer because of what I did. Punishing me is one thing...” His voice trailed off and he forced a half smile. “I'm not going to let it change my mind. Whatever Rebecca does will come back on them.”
“What about you?” I asked. “Do you think she'll do a good job?”
He rolled his eyes. “Piper, you know my sister. What do you think?”
I smirked. “She flunked economics and, rumor has it, did some 'extracurricular work' to pass her computer class. Social media was the extent of her computer knowledge.”
“So you can understand why they haven't let her do anything before.”
“Maybe they'll change their mind about the whole Britni thing to keep Rebecca out of the board room,” I suggested.
He shook his head. “They aren't the kind of people who'll go back on a threat. They'll put her in charge to punish me. But I'm not going back there.”
“Right.” I suddenly remembered. “Your business idea.”
He spun the empty coffee cup between his fingers. “I'm thinking now I might put things on hold for a while.”
Guilt welled up inside me. So I had screwed up things.
“I need to clear my head,” he continued. He glanced up at me. “About a lot of things, not just this.” He gestured between the two of us. “I need to figure out where my life's going and what I want from it. I'd never really given it serious thought before. It'd always been understood that I'd take over the family business, and I didn't have anything that was pulling at me, some other passion I needed to explore.”
“Where are you going to go?” I asked. I couldn't imagine never having dreams of my own. As poor as I'd grown up, my mother made sure I'd known, with enough hard work, I could accomplish what I wanted.
“Europe,” he said. “I have a few friends from college who live there. One is in Germany, another in France. I haven't seen them in a while. I'll look them up.” He tried for a wider smile. “Besides, rumor has it the women over there are easy.”
I forced a laugh and he did the same. I could tell he was trying not to show what he was really feeling. “And I've heard they like Americans.”
He smiled at my attempt to go with his joke. He glanced out the window and stood. “I really should get going.”
I stood as well. We looked at each other for a moment before exchanging an awkward hug.
“Be careful,” I said.
He nodded and turned toward the door.
A question popped into my head. I didn't want to ask it, but I knew I needed to. “Reed, about the dance grant.” He stopped and turned. “I need to know when it expires.”
“It doesn't.” His voice was quiet. “You have talent, Piper, and you deserve every opportunity to use it. It was a gift to you; no strings attached.” He paused, and then added, “And I’m taking your suggestion about making it a permanent thing for low-income families. Once your studies are complete, you'll get to help select another person to help.”
“Reed, I don't know what to say.”
“Nothing,” he said. “I just expect some good seats when you make it to Broadway.”
And then he was gone, leaving me standing in the café wondering if it was possible that things had actually just gone better than I'd ever imagined.
Chapter 9
I'd fully expected to be nervous when Julien picked me up for our date, but I wasn't. Not that I was exactly calm. Excitement hummed along my skin and the anticipation made my heart beat faster the closer the time got. Anastascia had gone back to her place yesterday, so I didn't even have her around to distract me. In fact, her parting words about why she hadn't stayed out the weekend had been about giving Julien and me space to do what we wanted, where we wanted. Not exactly the words of encouragement I could've used.
Would we end up back here? How long did he want to wait? The question kept circling in my head even as we walked to his car. I reminded myself that Julien and I were going to do this right. If we had sex tonight, it would be because the timing was right, not because I had no self-control when it came to him being naked.
I was surprised our conversation came as easily as it had when we were nothing more than friends. I'd anticipated an awkwardness that never came to be. We didn't struggle for topics or rehash the discussions we'd had before. If it hadn't been for the little things, it could've been any one of the dozens of times we'd hung out together as friends. Little things like Julien taking my arm as we walked down the concrete stairs to the entrance of The Tavern or how he placed his hand on the small of my back as our waiter led us to a table by the wine cellar.
The cold and threat of snow had kept people away and the place was relatively empty. We could hear the piano and singing from upstairs and it added a nice background to our easy conversation. He told me about what he was doing with all of his father's businesses and I told him about the different aspects of dance I was working on. We discussed the possibilities of ways he could use his family's companies to better the community, as well as having a lively debate over which Christmas special was the best.
By the time the check came, what we were doing felt as natural as breathing. When he reached for my hand across the table and threaded our fingers together, little sparks of electricity danced across my skin. It felt right, like we'd been made to fit together. His thumb traced circled across the back of my hand.
“We didn't talk about where this night was going to end,” Julien said softly. His eyes met mine. “I should take you home, give you a kiss good-night and then call you tomorrow.”
I swallowed hard, my stomach clenching as I willed him to give a second option. I knew we'd only been on this one date, but my body remembered his too well and craved it. He'd said he wanted to take it slow, but I wasn't sure that was the best option.
He continued, “Or, you could come back to my place. My cousin and his girlfriend left this morning. We could watch a movie and see where things go from there.”
“I'll take option number two.” I didn't even need to think about it.
Relief showed on Julien's face and his eyes sparkled. “I was hoping you'd say that.”
The energy between us on the ride from The Tavern to Julien's loft was almost palpable. If it hadn't started to snow, I probably would've leaned closer, run my hand over his thigh, but the roads were slick despite the salt trucks and I didn't want him to lose control of the car. Talking to cops or being in the ER was not how I planned on finishing out tonight.
Both of us were coated with fat, wet flakes by the time we got into his building and we laughed as we brushed them off. Even that laughter had an undercurrent of sexual electricity and only the presence of an elderly woman in the elevator kept us from starting things up right there. Instead, we stood next to each other, our fingers linked, and pretended we weren't both thinking about ripping the other one's clothes off.