I don’t know this city as well as I should, having grown up nearby. The Northwest University School of Nursing was my reason for moving here from Tanner, which is a suburb of the city. Simon went to Portland State University with some friends. He wanted to be away from Seattle. I don’t understand why.
When we get to the bar, the cab parks, and I take a deep breath. The line is loaded with girls in dresses and men in suits. Everyone is overdressed the way we are. I lean into the window of the cab, watching the lights in the line flicker off the smiling faces, flashing on all of their beautiful faces.
Why can’t I get excited? Binx found me, even if it still feels like a dream. I got rid of my evil roommate and landed the best one at school, hands down. My day has been fabulous.
I push away the worrywart within, hating the way school is making me crazy and the exams haven’t even started yet. I give Angie a look as she climbs out, grinning like she’s got a secret. She reminds me of a friend back home; I just can’t place which one.
“You ready to get this night off to a good start?”
I grin back. “That’s a pretty big line.”
She winks. “I have it covered.”
I climb out, following her to the front of the line. Every girl in line is as pretty as we are, if not more so. They are dolled up, and their dresses look more expensive than ours. I wrinkle my nose, wondering if she’s going to flash cash and get turned away. By the looks of every person lined up, they would have already tried that trick.
But as she approaches the tall man built like he might also be a wrestler or a hit man or a small building, his wide lips lift, and he nods as he pulls the crimson rope aside for her. She nods back at me. His eyes don’t even flicker on me, but he stares at her in the strangest way. It is almost as if he doesn’t see me.
The music starts to light up my body, flooding my head and heart with the beat. I swallow and swear even my throat moves to the sound of the loud drum and bass. It sounds like a rave as we enter, since the DJ is live, but the crowd isn’t high, not on drugs anyway. Everyone is dancing in a wave; even the people lingering and waiting for drinks at the bar move in sync with the others.
The lights flash, complementing the beats and the glittering crowds.
One small part of me relishes the sight of the writhing sea of glittery people. But only a small part. The other part just wants a drink. But we don’t have just one, and we don’t have the thing I want. Being a red-wine girl, I never expected Angie to be a shot-drinking girl.
After several, she pushes the final shot at me, as I nod and choke on the previous one. She knocks her glass against mine, spilling Fireball on my fingertips. I toss it back, placing the glass down and shaking my head back and forth. “No more.”
She grabs my slippery hand and drags me out onto the dance floor.
The song twists in my mind and my body, and everything feels right. In the midst of shaking with my hands in the air and a permanent grin on my face, I forget to be scared or confused. I have fun, like an idiotic college girl should.
3. Tall, dark, and handsome
We stagger from the bar, gripping each other.
“Top night, Jane.”
I laugh, shaking my head. “My name is Ash, crazy girl, who’s Jane?”
She slaps her hand against her head. “Och, I’m drunk. You remind me of a friend I had, back home. Her name was Jane.”
I giggle, then cringe as a sour burp fills my mouth. I realize the shots are not staying for the whole night. I stumble to the alley next to the bar, dragging Angie with me. “I think I’m going to be siii—”
“Jesus!” She jumps back just as I decorate the brick wall. I’m trembling and heaving but I can’t stop throwing up, and I assume it’s bad from the commentary and laughing of the people passing by us.
“Are you all right?” a man asks in the mix of my being sick and Angie shrieking. She says something, but I’m heaving so hard I can’t form the words to explain that I’m fine. The alley starts to darken as my eyes narrow. Everything goes to tunnel vision in the form of a pinhole as I grip the building, my fingers scraping down the bricks trying to steady myself.
Warmth surrounds me as the deep voice gets closer. “Are you all riiiii—?” His voice blends into the other noises as darkness envelops me completely. I am there, lost in my own blank space and then I am unconscious.
I wake with a gasp. Pain hits first, not warmth or the sound of my mother, or the feel of Binx getting pissed because I moved. No, it’s pain, and there’s plenty of it. A truckload. It starts at the back of my head. I twitch from it as I attempt opening one eye. The pain immediately shifts from the back of my head to my eye. I wince from the burning and pressure.