Short Soup(21)
Uncle Kai blinked up at Dion. “Now?”
“Yes, I need to clear up a few things with Toni.”
“But you have customers downstairs!”
“That’s why I’m asking you for help. Gary can tell you what needs to be done.”
Uncle Kai snorted. “Don’t need Gary tell me how to cook. I was cooking before he was born.”
“So you’ll do it? We won’t be more than half an hour.”
Uncle Kai heaved himself to his feet and started rolling up his shirt sleeves. “I can cook all night.” He gestured at the others. “Come on, what you waiting for? We show Gary how to cook properly.”
Toni watched in stunned silence as their parents filed out of the room.
When they were alone, Dion turned back to Toni. “My car’s out the back.”
“We’re leaving?”
“Just for a short drive. I don’t want to be interrupted or distracted.” He moved towards the stairs, beckoning at her to follow him, then stopped when she remained motionless. “Toni, please.”
His soft pleading broke down the last of her resistance. As if in a dream, she followed him down the stairs and out the back where his SUV was parked. They drove off, and soon the lights and bustle of the shopping strip were left behind. Dion drove with intense concentration, hands clamped to the steering wheel, even though they were barely moving above a snail’s pace. A few minutes later he pulled off on the side of the road. She was so wound up it took her a while to realise they were at Fly Point, their old haunting ground.
Gravel crunched beneath her high heels as she climbed out of the car. Mauve tinted clouds streaked the darkening sky, and a light evening breeze tugged at her dress, licking the dampness from the back of her neck. Dion beckoned towards the stairs leading down to the beach. They hadn’t spoken since they’d left the Happy Palace, and she was reluctant to break the silence. She slipped off her shoes and padded after him down the stairs, the wooden boards beneath her soles still warm from the afternoon sun.
On the beach the incoming tide slapped and swirled against the rocks, restless and hungry. Dion turned towards her. In the dimming light he appeared hesitant, less confident than he’d been back at the restaurant.
“I didn’t expect our night together to be the focus of discussion at dinner,” he said.
She swallowed, trying to keep her tone light as she replied, “Our parents have no sense of boundaries.”
He moved a step closer but still kept his distance. “Back at the restaurant, you said last night was an accident. Do you really believe that?”
The earnestness in his voice made her pause as she tried to reconstruct all the events that had led to last night. It seemed ever since she’d arrived in Piper Bay three days ago every event had conspired towards and ultimately culminated in her falling into Dion’s arms.
“I don’t know.” She shook her head in confusion. “I’d never thought of you as a potential lover, and then, these past few days, when I did start to notice you, I didn’t know what to make of it. It seemed as if a giant wave came out of nowhere and swept me up, like a flash flood. I guess that’s why it felt like an accident, because I wasn’t expecting it.”
He breathed in and out several times. “For me it was no accident. I’d been dreaming about just such a night for years.”
Shock squeezed her lungs. “Years?” she wheezed.
He nodded, a wistful smile playing on his lips. “That’s how long I’ve been in love with you, Mei-hua.”
She couldn’t breathe, couldn’t speak. Blood thrummed in her ears. “You’re in love,” she managed to get out, “with me.”
“Yes.”
“I don’t understand.” She began to hyperventilate. “You’ve never … you’ve never said a word, dropped a hint … anything.”
“I was going to tell you. When I realised how I felt about you, I got in my car and sped all the way down to Sydney.” His smile became a grimace. “And then I saw you with Nick, and I knew I was too late. So I came back home.”
This couldn’t be happening. “When?” she spluttered. “When did this happen?”
“About eighteen months after you started uni.” He paused. “You were on the lawn outside your college. With Nick. You were obviously enthralled with him.”
A rush of painful memories assaulted her. Those first months she’d been giddy with astonishment that someone as popular as Nick had chosen her, and in her eagerness to prove her worthiness she’d turned herself inside out to please him, while all the time suspicion had lurked that she wasn’t good enough, conspiring with hope to twist her into an emotional pretzel. If Dion had appeared then, would she have seen through her confusion and recognised that what she’d felt for Nick wasn’t love but infatuation?
“I didn’t even know you came to see me,” she protested. “You should have stayed and talked to me.”
“No, in a way I’m glad I didn’t spill my guts to you. It wouldn’t have been fair on you. At the time I was a total mess. I didn’t know what to do with my life; I was mixing with the wrong people …” He hesitated before continuing, “You may as well know that was just after Dad caught me smoking dope. He made me see how low I’d fallen. I realised how much I missed you, how much you meant to me. But imagine what would have happened if I’d thrown myself at you. You’d have felt obliged to help me out, and I would’ve just been a big, dead albatross around your neck.”
That’s not true. She couldn’t get the words out for the suffocating lump in her throat. If he’d been there maybe he’d have saved her from making such a terrible mistake with Nick. He would have reminded her of who she was, would have shown her that she didn’t need to change for anyone, that she was fine just the way she was.
“Seeing you with Nick was the kick up the pants I needed,” Dion continued. “I realised I had to stop wasting my life. I’d lost you–” For the first time his voice quivered. “– but on reflection I realised I wasn’t ready to love anyone, not the sorry screw-up I’d degenerated into. I had to get myself sorted out first. I had to make something of myself so that I could stand tall, so you’d be proud of me instead of just pitying me.”
“All this time, I didn’t know.” Hot emotion clogged her voice. “I wish I’d known.”
“Would it have made a difference?”
“Yes. Maybe. I don’t know.” Shivering, she wiped the moisture from the corners of her eyes. “So last night wasn’t just a casual thing for you.”
He swallowed, his smile wavering. “Couldn’t you tell? I’d been waiting for last night forever. I never thought it would happen.”
Still, she couldn’t allow herself to hope because there was still so much left unexplained. “But you’ve made no attempt to stop me returning to Sydney. Why?”
His smile widened, became teasing. “So you want me to throw my weight around, huh? And you’d be willing to stay here? Move in with me?”
The look in his eyes hooked her, sent warmth unfurling through her veins. “Yes,” she answered without hesitation.
“That’s a drastic step. I’ve been thinking about you for years. You might call it an obsession. When you finally arrived and started paying some attention to me, I was a bit frightened that reality wouldn’t live up to my expectations, but last night …” He exhaled a slow breath. “Last night I knew beyond a doubt I’m in love with you. It’s taken me many years and a lot of soul-searching to reach this point, but for you it’s different …” Pained uncertainty showed in his eyes.
“I’m in love with you. Can’t you tell?” Her legs were shaking. She longed to reach out and touch him, but his doubtful, searching eyes held her at bay.
“I think you should come up here as often as you can, spend more time with me, get to know me better.”
That was what she should have done with Nick, and if she had she would have realised their relationship wouldn’t last. But with Dion? She threw back her head, letting out a groan of frustration. “Dion, I know you already. I’ve seen you at your worst and your best. For God’s sake, don’t you want me in your life?”
His expression became tortured. “I want that more than anything, but I’m not going to ask you to make changes just to suit me. You have a great career ahead of you. I won’t jeopardise that by asking you to stay.”
She shook her head. “You’re happy for us to live apart?”
“Hell, of course I’m not happy about that.” He rubbed his hands against his jacket then clenched them at his sides as if he didn’t trust himself. “But I don’t want you to stay here just because of me. I don’t want you resenting me ten years from now. If there’s one thing I’ve learnt over the years it’s this – you can’t pin your hopes on someone or something to make you happy. Only you can make yourself happy. I want you to go out there and be the best you can. Build your career in Sydney, come back to Piper Bay whenever you can. I love you, Toni. I’ll always be there for you.”