Shopaholic to the Stars(19)

‘But, Bex, isn’t all this shopping costing you a lot of money?’

‘Shopping?’ I echo incredulously. ‘Suze, it’s not shopping. It’s investing in my job. And I usually get a discount. Sometimes I even get things for free. I just have to tell them that I’m shopping for Sage Seymour, and bingo!’

It’s amazing how excited shop owners get when you mention Sage Seymour. They practically throw clothes at you!

‘But you’re not shopping for Sage Seymour,’ says Suze flatly.

I stare at her, perplexed. Hasn’t she been following what I’m saying?

‘Yes I am! Of course I am! These things aren’t even my size!’

‘But she hasn’t asked you to. She doesn’t even know who you are.’

I feel a twinge of resentment. Suze doesn’t have to remind me. It’s not my fault I have the crappest husband in the world who refuses to introduce me to his celebrity clients.

‘She will know who I am, as soon as Luke introduces us,’ I explain patiently. ‘And then we’ll get chatting, and I’ll have all these looks ready for her and become her personal stylist. Suze, I’m building a whole new career!’ I can see Suze is about to raise another objection, so I carry on hurriedly. ‘And anyway, I’m going to get double the use out of these clothes, because you’re going to wear them and I’m going to take your picture and I’m going to build up a portfolio.’

‘Ooh.’ Suze perks up. ‘You want me to be your model?’

‘Exactly.’

‘Cool!’ Suze starts looking at the clothes with more interest and reaches for the coat again. ‘Let’s start with this.’ She puts on the coat and I start adjusting the collar. Suze is so beautiful and willowy, she looks great in anything, and I feel a fizz of excitement at the thought of building up a library of amazing pictures.

I’ve been totally inspired by reading about Nenita Dietz on the internet. When she moved to Hollywood twenty years ago, she didn’t know anyone. But she wangled her way on to the set of Love’s Breezing, and marched into the office of the Head of Wardrobe, and wouldn’t leave until he’d looked at her portfolio. He was so impressed, he employed her immediately. And then the star, Mary-Jane Cheney, hired her as a personal stylist, and it all snowballed from there.

Well, I can do that, too. I just need to put together a portfolio, and get on a film set somehow.

Suze is now wearing the brocade coat, a beret and a pair of sunglasses and posing in front of the mirror.

‘You look fab,’ I say. ‘Tomorrow I’ll do your hair and makeup and we’ll have a proper shoot.’

Suze comes back to the bed and starts rifling through a bag of skirts. ‘These are nice, too.’ She holds one up against herself and looks at the label. ‘Oh, they’re by Danny.’

‘I phoned his office and they sent a whole bunch over,’ I explain. ‘They’re from the new collection. You know, Sarah Jessica Parker’s assistant asked especially to see a sneak preview?’ I add. ‘Danny told me himself.’

‘Ooh, SJP!’ Suze’s head pops up. ‘Is she in LA? Have you met her?’

‘No,’ I say, and Suze sighs.

‘Haven’t you met anyone famous?’

This is what everyone has been asking me since I got back. Mum, Dad, our neighbours Janice and Martin, everyone. I’m tired of saying, ‘No, I haven’t met anyone famous.’ And the truth is, I did meet someone famous, didn’t I? I mean, I know I promised to keep it a secret. But Suze is my best friend. Telling a best friend doesn’t count.

‘Suze,’ I say, lowering my voice. ‘If I tell you something, you can’t tell a soul. Not Tarkie, not anyone. I’m serious.’

‘I promise,’ she says, her eyes wide. ‘What is it?’

‘I met Lois Kellerton.’

‘Lois Kellerton?’ She sits straight up. ‘Oh my God! You never told me that!’

‘I’m telling you now! But I didn’t just meet her …’

Suze is the best person to share stuff with. As I tell her about seeing Lois Kellerton shoplifting, and about chasing her down the street, she gasps and puts her hand to her mouth and says ‘No way’ several times.

‘… and I promised not to tell anyone,’ I conclude.

‘Well, I won’t blab,’ says Suze at once. ‘Anyway, who would I tell? The children? The sheep? Tarkie?’

We both start giggling. Tarkie probably has no idea who Lois Kellerton is, even.

‘But it’s so weird,’ Suze adds, her brow creased in thought. ‘I can’t believe it. Why would a big movie star like that steal socks?’