“Why doesn’t she like John? She was implying he was the one who hurt Natalie.” I took out my tape recorder and pressed the On button, partly because I didn’t want to waste time with ego games, and partly because I hoped she’d say something about John worth printing. If he was the prime suspect, at least in Wind Gap minds, I needed comment.
“That’s just Amma. She has a mean streak. John likes me and not her, so she attacks him. When she’s not trying to steal him away from me. Like that’s going to happen.”
“It seems a lot of people have been talking, though, saying they think John may have something to do with this. Why do you think that is?”
She shrugged, stuck her lower lip out, watched the tape whir a few seconds.
“You know how it is. He’s from out of town. He’s smart and worldly and eight times better looking than anyone else around here. People would like it to be him, because then that means this…evilness didn’t come from Wind Gap. It came from outside. Eat your tart.”
“Do you believe he’s innocent?” I took a bite, the glaze dripping off my lip.
“Of course I do. It’s all idle gossip. Just because someone goes for a drive…lots of people do that around here. John just had bad timing.”
“And what about the family? What can you tell me about either of the girls?”
“They were darling girls, very well behaved and sweet little things. It’s like God plucked the best girls from Wind Gap to take to heaven for his own.” She’d been practicing, the words had a rehearsed rhythm. Even her smile seemed measured: Too small is stingy, too big is inappropriately pleased. This smile just right. Brave and hopeful, it said.
“Meredith, I know that’s not what you thought about the girls.”
“Well, what kind of quote do you want?” she snapped.
“A truthful one.”
“I can’t do that. John would hate me.”
“I wouldn’t have to name you in the article.”
“Then what would be the point of me doing the interview?”
“If you know something about the girls that people aren’t saying, you should tell me. It could direct attention away from John, depending on what the information is.”
Meredith took a demure sip of tea, dabbed at the corner of her strawberry lips with her napkin.
“But could I still get my name in the article somewhere?”
“I can quote you elsewhere by name.”
“I want the stuff about God plucking them to heaven,” Meredith baby-talked. She wrung her hands and smiled at me sideways.
“No. Not that. I’ll use the quote about John being from out of town and that’s why people are so gossipy about him.”
“Why can’t you use the one I want?” I could see Meredith as a five-year-old, dressed as a princess and bitching because her favorite doll didn’t like her imaginary tea.
“Because it goes against a lot of things I’ve heard, and because no one really talks that way. It sounds fake.”
It was the most pathetic showdown I’ve ever had with a subject, and a completely unethical way to do my work. But I wanted her fucking story. Meredith twirled the silver chain around her neck, studied me.
“You could have been a model, you know?” she said suddenly.
“I doubt that,” I snapped. Every time people said I was pretty, I thought of everything ugly swarming beneath my clothes.
“You could have. I always wanted to be you when I grew up. I think about you, you know? I mean, our moms are friends and all, so I knew you were in Chicago and I pictured you in this big mansion with a few little curly tops and some stud husband investment banker. You all in the kitchen drinking orange juice and him getting in his Jag and going to work. But I guess I imagined wrong.”
“You did. Sounds nice, though.” I took another bite of tart. “So tell me about the girls.”
“All business, huh? You never were the friendliest. I know about your sister. That you had a sister who died.”
“Meredith, we can talk some time. I’d like that. After this. But let’s get this story, and then maybe we can enjoy ourselves.” I didn’t intend on staying more than a minute after the interview wrapped.
“Okay…So, here it is. I think I know why…the teeth…” she pantomimed extraction.
“Why?”
“I can’t believe everyone refuses to acknowledge this,” she said.
Meredith glanced around the room.
“You didn’t hear this from me, okay?” she continued. “The girls, Ann and Natalie, they were biters.”
“What do you mean, biters?”