Shadow Reaper (Shadow #2)(2)

He shook his head, sighing. "I know, Stefano. I'm sorry. I lost control of the car." That was true. He had. He remembered very little of the aftermath, but in that moment when he realized the car wasn't an extension of him anymore, that it was a beast roaring for supremacy, separate from him, he had felt relief that it was over. If he had died, it all would have been over and the danger to his family gone.



"Are you convincing me? Or yourself?" Stefano asked quietly. "We're taking you out of here, but you have to pull yourself together. Enough with the craziness, Ricco, or I'll have no choice but to pull you off rotation even when you're physically fit and have the doctor's okay to work."



Gasps went up from his brothers and Emmanuelle, his sister. Francesca uttered a soft "no" and shook her head. Ricco's heart nearly seized. He was a rider. A shadow rider. It was who he was. What he was. A rider had no choice but to do what he'd been trained for from the age of two  – even before that. It was in his bones, in his blood, he couldn't live without it. He dispensed justice to those the law couldn't touch.



Stefano stepped directly in front of him, close, so they were eye to eye. "Understand me, Ricco. I won't lose you. I'll do anything to save you. Anything. Give anything, including my life. I'll use every weapon in my arsenal to protect you from yourself and any enemy that comes your way. You do something about this, whatever it takes, and that includes counseling. But there aren't going to be any more accidents. You get me, brother? There will be no more accidents."



       
         
       
        



Ricco nodded his head. What else could he do? When Stefano laid down the law he meant every word he said. It wasn't often Stefano spoke like this to them, but no one would ever defy him, including Ricco. He loved his brother. His family. He'd sacrificed most of his life for them gladly, but Stefano was more than a brother. He was mom, dad, big brother, protector, all of it rolled into one.



It had been Stefano who had always been there for him. His own mother and father hadn't even come to the hospital to visit him after the accident, but Stefano had barely left even to eat. He looked haggard and worn. Every time the pain had awakened Ricco from his semiconscious state, Stefano and his brothers and Emmanuelle had been right there with him. That solidarity only reinforced Ricco's decision to keep them safe. They were everything to him.



"I get you," he assured softly.



"It's done then. When the doctor okays it, you resume training, but you don't train any more than the regular hours. You sleep even if you have to take something to get you to sleep. You stop drinking so fucking much, and you talk to me if you are having trouble doing those things."



Ricco's heart was pounding overtime now. He couldn't promise Stefano that he would stop with his extra training hours. He had to make certain he was in top form at all times, that he didn't  – couldn't  – ever make a mistake. That was part of him as well. But how did he explain that to his brother when he couldn't explain why? He just nodded, remaining silent so no one could hear his lie.



He drank sometimes to put himself to sleep, but he could stop with no problem, he just wouldn't be able to sleep. He wasn't about to say anything more to Stefano. It was impossible to lie to him and he didn't want his brother to worry any more than he already did.



Staring into the mirror as he finished buttoning his dove-gray shirt, he looked at the vicious bruises and the swelling, the side of his head that had nearly been caved in. Beneath the shirt his muscles rippled with every movement, a testimony to his strength  – and he was unbelievably strong. It had been his superb physical condition that had saved him from certain death  – at least that was what the surgeon said, his strength and a miracle. His frame was deceptive in that his roped muscles weren't so obvious, the way his cousins' were, but they were there beneath the skin of his wide shoulders and powerful arms.



He reached for his suit jacket. The Ferraro family of riders always wore pin-striped suits. Always. It was their signature. Even Emmanuelle wore the suit, fitted and making her look like a million bucks, but then she could wear anything and look beautiful. He sent his sister a reassuring smile because she looked as if she might cry. He knew he looked rough. He felt worse than rough, but his sister didn't have to know that. 



"I'm fine, Emme," he reassured softly. He wasn't, but then he hadn't been for a long, long time.



"Of course you are," she said briskly, but she looked strained. "Walking away from a crash like that is easy for a Ferraro."