Shadow Mated(20)

Holding her hand tight so she couldn’t escape, he led her down the hallway to the back entrance of the lodge. Where to bring her, where to bring her…

He had a cabin of his own but he hardly ever stayed there. It was cold and empty and reminded him of everything he couldn’t have. He spent most of his time in the small guest room Layna kept reserved for him. It allowed for him to be available around the clock. A quick call, and he came running. But it didn’t feel like home either.

Home. He’d take her to her cabin. Her bed, where she’d be comfortable. He wanted this to be special. Wanted their first time to be perfect. Wanted her to remember it and smile that secret grin he saw all the couples exchange.

Fuck. What was happening to him?

They pushed outside and were met by the cool night air. Yet it did nothing for the burn his body was enduring. Forget the trail, they were going straight through the woods. Faster that way.

Leaves and twigs crunched under Gash’s boots as he cleared a path for Bailey with his body. He even slowed a little to account for her flimsy footwear. But he was trembling with the need to feel her close, and he kept going too fast.

“Gash, wait,” she huffed.

No matter how badly he wanted her, all she had to do was command him, and his cat paid attention. He stopped so abruptly she ran into him and stumbled backward. But in a swift move, he kept her upright, wrapping his arms tight around her body and pressing her back against the rough trunk of a tree.

She drew in a long gasp and held it. They were so close. So damn close. He could smell her sweet apple scent and the product she used to keep her hair back from her face. He could see every line in her amber streaked eyes, and her lips… full and pouty and kissable.

Bailey released her breath as his gaze traveled lower to her thin shirt. His hands had to do the searching from that point because they were fused at the waist and he wasn’t moving away even to explore her.

His open palm smoothed along her side, over her ribs where he felt her sharp intake of breath, across her hip and around to cup her lush ass, all the while never taking his eyes from hers. He was talking to her without words, and all he could do was hope she heard him.

He gave her a little squeeze that brought her mouth open in a noiseless yelp, before making the journey back over her curves to cradle her cheeks.

“What… what are we doing?” she whispered, and he could feel her trepidation through their bond. He wanted it gone. All her doubt about them, he wanted to obliterate it.

If he could just make her see how good he would treat her. How safe he could keep her. How much love he hid in his heart for fear it wouldn’t be accepted.

Like Felix said, he’d always been the one with the softest heart. He’d loved vile, evil people and wanted their love in return, only to never feel it.

And now he loved his Bailey and couldn’t find a way to show her. He’d tried to tell her. He bared his soul last night, and all she’d said was thank you.

What could he do to make her see him? Feel him, like he felt her. Make her see that he was the male for her.

“I want to kiss you,” he rushed out, his breath stalling with the admission. “I want to kiss you so fucking bad. Let me kiss you, Bailey.”

Somehow she relaxed in his grip. Like his words settled her. She licked her lips and his eyes followed the motion as she rolled them together. A tiny unsure nod sealed the deal.

He was going to kiss his mate after all this time.

Get this right. Fuck, Gash, man, get this right.

Slow, when he wanted to slam his mouth against hers and claim her with a bite. Careful this first time. A kiss from his heart to show her how cherished she was. That he appreciated everything she did for their clan. That he saw her, and wanted her for life. Something to erase all the ugly words he’d used to put distance between them.

Holding her face as gently as he was able, thumbs brushing her cheeks, he inched forward, pressing his weight into her hips. It took him three whole breaths to reach her lips, and when he did, the feeling was so sweet he felt something break in his chest. He’d never kissed a female like this. Not like this.

Something around his heart cracked wide open to let her in. And once she was safe inside, he would close it back up to protect what they had together. No one would touch their love once he had hers secured.

My life.

Felix’s words snaked through his mind. I owe you a life. But he’d never get Bailey. Never. Gash would see to it. His wretched, repeating nightmare would never be reality.

Shaking with emotion, he pulled back, but only enough to catch a breath. He’d only barely brushed her giving mouth, but the connection had been life changing for him, and he wasn’t ready to see how she was affected yet. He wanted more, wanted to show her more.