"So, tell me Sundy, whose baby are you carrying?" Taylor asked slowly walking towards me.
I tried to speak but my mouth was so dry. Drained of all saliva. I was caught. There was nothing I could say or do to get out of this situation. I wished that I was just dreaming, but I knew this was all too real. Travis had told Taylor about the baby and about the affair. Why did I ever doubt him? They've been boys since forever.
"WHAT?! I can't hear you! Say something, Sundy!" Taylor spat with venom.
His eyes had turned black and his dark skin was now tinted red. He was furious and I was scared to even speak because I just wasn't ready to admit the truth.
"It's your baby, Taylor. What are you talking about?" I finally said, choked up, and lying through my teeth.
I just couldn't help it.
"BULLSHIT, BITCH!" Taylor roared.
My body instantly tensed up. I couldn't believe Taylor had called me a bitch. Since I've been with Taylor he had never called me anything but my name. I was on the verge of tears. I knew my marriage was over and Travis was to blame. I glared at him with nothing but hatred. He wore that ‘I told you I was going to tell' expression on his face which angered me more.
I wanted to plead with Taylor and beg him for his forgiveness. But I just wasn't ready to tell the truth yet.
"What you looking at Travis for? That man can't save you! Can't nothing save you! Because you are a dirty ass bitch! I fucking hate you, Sundy!" Taylor yelled.
Tears were steaming down my face. "Stop calling me names, Taylor! Just STOP! I don't deserve that! This is your baby!" I screamed.
"STOP LYING TO ME, GIRL! Travis told me everything! Everything! Y'all been fucking for two years! Behind my back! Y'all fucked on my fucking Yacht that I paid for! You are pregnant with his son!" Taylor was screaming at the top of his lungs. I could literally see veins protruding from his neck and forehead. I had never seen Taylor so angry. I knew if he could kill me now, he would.
"It's not true Taylor! Please!"
Travis shook his head and dropped his hands to his side.
"Just stop it, Sundy. I told him everything. Everything is out there. I told you for months what I was going to do if you didn't tell him soon. What we did was wrong and we both know that. The fact that you're carrying my baby is why I did what I did. Ain't no way I'm not going to be in my son's life. I'm going to take care of him and be here for him. Nobody else! I couldn't allow T.J. to go on thinking My son was his son. That wasn't going to happen."
I wanted to spit in Travis's face for ruining everything. I mean was he not thinking about me and where I would end up? Did it not occur to him that I had no other family here In Ohio? If Taylor kicked me out, where would I go? All of those thoughts were running through my head but deep inside I knew it had to be done. Everything was out there and for some strange reason I felt like the world was lifted off my shoulders.
"You know what, Sundy. You can take that U-Haul that's parked outside and drive it to wherever you need to go. Your clothes are already inside. You gotta get out of my house." Taylor spoke calmly.
I could tell his mind was all over the place and he didn't know what else to do. I loved my husband, so I was going to fight for my marriage.
"Taylor, please. I'm sorry. Don't do this to me. I'm begging you! We can work through this!" I pleaded. I dropped to my knees and lowered my head in shame. I knew I deserved whatever was coming to me. I knew I didn't deserve Taylor at this moment but I was going to fight.
Taylor shook his head becoming frustrated once again. "Get...the fuck...out...of my house."
His words were clear and sharp. Nothing more to be said. I slowly picked myself up off the floor pathetically as Travis sat and watched. I couldn't feel any lower. The two men who I thought cared for me were staring down at me like I was nothing. Truth be told, that's how I felt. I turned around to leave.
"And don't you dare take Tayla anywhere. She's staying with me. She doesn't need to be with a whore like you and if you got a problem with that, we can take it to court-and I can assure you that if we take it there, it won't end well."
I stopped in my tracks and just listened to him degrade me. I had no more fight in me. Not only did I lose my husband, but I was losing my daughter too. I continued towards the door.
"And don't you dare take any of my fucking cars. You leave the key at the door. You're lucky I'm going to keep the credit cards on for you until this divorce is settled."
By the time he was done talking, I was half way out the door. Marcia was standing at the front entrance with a half-smile on her face. I knew she was enjoying every bit of this. I stopped to straighten my body and walk with my head high. I wasn't going to give this bitch the satisfaction of seeing me walk pathetically with my head down in shame. As I approached her, I mouthed "Fuck you" loud enough so that she could hear me.
I got inside the U-Haul and drove away from the place I once called my home. I knew I wouldn't be homeless because my credit cards were still on so I could go rent a condo right now if I wanted to. I was in no mood to think about roof being put over my homeless head. I needed comfort and I needed someone to talk to and give me their honest opinion about my situation. I only knew one person who was real and who would welcome me with open arms; Cynthia.
FOURTEEN
I staggered up towards Cynthia's door. Words just couldn't explain how low I felt. I just wanted to curl up in a ball and die. My face was stained with old tears and new ones were falling. Not to mention I was soak and wet because it had started to rain.
When Cynthia opened the door she immediately rushed towards me asking what had happened to me. All I could do was break down and cry. I was cold, miserable, and pregnant. I could not stop myself from crying. It was like my soul wanted to release every drop of sadness I had inside of me.
"My God, Sundy. What happened? Where's Taylor? Tell me what's going on!" Cynthia demanded.
I couldn't find the words. I just needed a bath and I needed to sleep. I was under a lot of stress and I knew if I kept it up, I would be having the baby soon.
"Please, I just need to shower and sleep. Please," I whispered.
"Sundy, tell me what's going on! I'm calling Taylor!"
"NO! No! Please no Cynthia. Don't. Please, I just need a shower and a bed. I promise I'll talk to you tomorrow." I pleaded with her.
Cynthia looked hesitant, but reluctantly gave in. The shower really didn't do much to help. I cried the entire time I was inside the shower. I even cried inside the bed. Next thing I knew I was dead asleep and didn't wake up until twelve pm the next day. The sleep kind of made me feel a little better. I was still feeling down but Cynthia knew how to cheer me up. She brought me breakfast in bed along with some orange juice.
Yesterday had to be the worst day of my life. Not only did my husband degrade me, but my unborn child's father sat there and watched it happen. When I woke up, I had absolutely no messages from Travis asking about his son and if he was ok inside my belly. I felt completely shut out but this was why I didn't want the truth to come out because I knew this was what I was facing.
Although I was sad, I knew I had to pull it together for my baby's sake. I actually wanted to go condo shopping today so I'll have my own place. I loved Cynthia's place but I needed my own. My son would be here in less than a month and even with all that's going on; I had to keep it together. If Taylor really did divorce me that would break my heart wide open. I knew I would never love again and it would just be me and my kids for the rest of my life. Even though Taylor sounded pretty sure about his decision, I knew he was angry and probably didn't mean half the things he said to me. I was going to still try and fight for my marriage.
"So, are you gonna tell me what the hell happened last night that made you show up here soak and wet and eight and a half months pregnant?" Cynthia asked, as we took our seats out on her lake front patio. We both were sipping on hot cocoa and had a thick blanket over our legs keeping us warm.
I lowered my eyes to the ground. There was no need for lying anymore. I figured I might as well tell it like it is.
"Travis and I have been having an affair." I blurted out.
I glared over at Cynthia who sat wide eyed in shock. "Wait a minute. What?" She said, knowing she heard me clearly.
But I repeated it anyway.