My eyes began to water. I wanted to tell him so bad what was going on. About the affair, me being pregnant by his best friend, just everything. I couldn't help the tears falling from my eyes. It was just too much to bear knowing I could possibly lose Taylor because I was so stupid and selfish. I knew Taylor loved me with his heart and soul, but did he love me enough to forgive me for this painful secret that I was holding in?
TWELVE
4 months later ...
FALL
It was Halloween and I was literally as big as a house. I was 8 1/2 months pregnant and felt like I would pop. These four months had been the most stressful I'd ever encountered. Not only had I not told Taylor yet about the baby, but Travis was calling bugging me every day about it. It took him coming to one of my doctor's appointments to get him to calm down about the situation. He was ecstatic when he found out we were having a little boy.
I was kinda on fence when Travis demanded to go to a doctor's appointment because I knew Dr. Matthews would question who exactly Travis was. I told him Travis was my brother and he bought it. I was immediately surprised when Travis didn't chime in and say he was actually the baby daddy. I could see he was a little offended by the comment but he kept his mouth closed.
Travis had his Jr. but while he was thinking that, Taylor thought he also had his Jr. Travis threatened me every day to tell Taylor about the baby not being his, especially when Travis found out it was a boy. He wanted nothing more than to be in his son's life. I actually had no plans on telling Taylor. I'd made up my mind and I couldn't break the news. I'd rather continue the way it was now. I actually did not believe Travis would tell Taylor because if he was going to he would've been done it. Plus, I don't think Travis wanted to lose their friendship.
Since it was Halloween, Taylor and I decided to take Tayla up to Fear Fest at King's Island. This was the last day they would be open until next year so we wanted her to have a blast. She rode almost all the rides in the entire park. I could only get on some kiddie rides because my stomach was like a giant air balloon. My feet were swollen, and I waddled everywhere. I must admit Taylor was being the best dad and husband ever.
He rubbed my feet and massaged my back when they ached. He would actually give Marcia time off so he could cook for me, which, he was an excellent cook. My love for him was growing day by day, and day by day, I knew it would be a huge mistake to ever admit to my affair and that I wasn't carrying his seed. Travis would just have to live with secretly sharing our son. The entire time we were at King's Island, Travis was calling my phone but I wouldn't answer. He texted a million times asking how the baby was.
He was really becoming a pest but I knew he was just so worried about his son. I actually didn't expect for Travis to be like this. I thought he was going to be cool and chill like always but he had changed a lot, his life centered on our son. He'd already gone shopping for him. I didn't know what was going on with Valerie but he hadn't mouthed a word about her in four months. I guess he told her about the baby, so now she's not feeling too joyful anymore? If that were the case, it was good to me because the bitch was too damn happy all the time anyway.
It was freezing cold outside and I hated the cold. Times like this I wished I lived In Florida. There was seriously nothing to do in Cincinnati during the cold months except for ice skating on Fountain Square. On the drive home, we stopped at a Chinese restaurant and ordered fried rice although we had ate tons of goodies at King's Island.
By the time we got home, Tayla was passed out. Taylor had to carry her inside and put her in her bed. We both took a bath together and lay in bed with hot cocoa in our hands. Taylor rubbed my belly in circular motions. It was something he loved doing since I started to show.
"I love you, son," Taylor said, kissing my belly.
Words couldn't explain how shitty I felt for leading him on, but this was how it had to be.
****
"Girl, get ya fat ass up! Let's go shopping!" Cynthia squealed into the phone like it wasn't ten o'clock in the morning.
I rose from my bed yawning and rubbing my eyes. This heifer was out of her mind. I glared at the clock and instantly got pissed.
"Honey, do you not see the time?" I said, annoyed.
"Yeah, I see it. And? By the time you get ready it'll be eleven o'clock. Now get up. I got a fun day planned for us. Make sure you bundle you and that baby bump up!"
Without another word she disconnected the call. I turned over to see if Taylor was still in bed and he wasn't. He began going back to work but only for short amount of hours. I knew Marcia had already taken Tayla to daycare so I was the only one who needed to get up and going. I dressed myself in the only thing I could fit now. I put on some brown leggings with a brown maternity echo sweater that Cynthia had bought me last year.
This year was my first time wearing one. It was comfy and plenty room to move around in. This was definitely Ugg boot season too, so I had to slip some on. I flat ironed my hair bone straight and was out the door at exactly 12 p.m.
I didn't arrive at Kenwood Mall until thirty minutes later, where Cynthia was waiting for me at the front entrance. I hadn't seen Cynthia in over five months. Her and Mike were always on vacation along with their daughter, Daisy. Cynthia was a big time family woman and I admired that about her. Mike was her soul mate and her rock,sort of like me and Taylor.
"About time ya big ass got here," Cynthia stood up to hug me.
"Ol' shut up, heifer. I can't move that fast with this belly ya know." I cracked.
"Girl I still cannot believe you're pregnant again. I just knew Tayla was going to be the only child like you are. And I know Taylor ecstatic about being a daddy to a son. Girl Mike want a son so bad but I don't think I'm ready to carry another baby. We're always on the go. No time for that."
We started walking in the direction of all the stores. Kenwood mall was my favorite mall in Cincinnati because it was big and diverse. Their prices were good and you can count on grabbing some good food too. I was listening to Cynthia talk about their recent trip to India, which is why I didn't hear from her in five months. She told me how there were so many people with Aids over there that it was ridiculous. She also told me that over there, they believe in eating humans and selling the body parts in markets with onions and carrots, I listened on disgusted. I never have and never would make plans to visit India.
We didn't even know where time had gone. By the time we were done shopping, it was going on 5 p.m. We both had about one hundred bags each. Some of the security guards had to actually help us carry some of the stuff out to our cars.
Before we departed, we stopped and grabbed some Chipotle and went our separate ways. It was always good to hang with Cynthia. We would literally talk about everything under the sun. I wanted so badly to tell her my situation but I felt it was no longer any point in that. I've made my decision on what I was going to do and that's not telling Taylor about the baby. If Cynthia was to ever find out, I knew she wouldn't judge me.
I arrived back home around five. I had called ahead of time to see if Taylor was home to help me with my bags. When he didn't answer I figured he was still at work. That was until I saw a Pepsi Blue Range Rover parked in the front of our home alongside a U-Haul truck. What the hell. I didn't notice the car but I knew it wasn't Taylor's. I parked my car and waddled all the way towards the front door. When I got inside, I could hear two deep voices talking and it was coming from the kitchen.
When I got closer and peeped inside the door, I could've shitted my pants when I saw Travis and Taylor both standing side by side, while looking in the direction I was in. Travis was leaned against the counter with his index finger rested on his temple while Taylor's expression was unreadable. He was staring at me with such piercing eyes that I had to look away. It was like he was digging my grave with his eyes.
If I wasn't smart, I wouldn't have known what was going on but I knew exactly what time it was. Travis wasn't playing games anymore. I knew I was caught and that Taylor knew everything.
THIRTEEN
"Well, well, looky who's back from shopping and spending all my goddamn money," Taylor hissed.
I could sense the hatred in his voice. All I could manage to do was stand there looking at him. I knew I looked pathetic the way he was staring at me, looking up and down, while shaking his head at the sight of me. Travis just stood there with his eyes on the floor.