“You’re kidding, right?” Her voice and eyes turned into something out of The Shining.
Obviously, I wasn’t, but fuck if I wasn’t fearful to admit that now.
“Uh…”
She took a drink from the glass, swallowed, and then closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose. “Please, tell me you can watch the kids tonight.”
“Like just for a few hours, or the whole night?” I questioningly teased. I mean, it was obvious by the backpacks and roller suitcases her kids weren’t here for a short two-hour playdate.
Annoyed turned pleading in a heartbeat. “Please, tell me you can watch the kids.” She clasped both hands together. “Please. Please. Please. I need this. I even bought a new dress just for this occasion. I swear to God, it’s been three years since Brian and I have had a night out together. I’m seriously begging you.”
“Cute dress, by the way,” I complimented and leaned a hip against the counter. “Those Pilates classes are seriously paying off. You look like you could crack a walnut open with your thighs.”
“I know, right?” she agreed with a confident hand to her hip.
“How many times a week do you go?”
“It depends on my schedule, but—” She paused and then pointed an accusing index finger in my direction. “Don’t try to change the subject.”
I feigned annoyance. “I mean, I had a big night planned out, Annie. My dealer should be stopping by any minute. And Reed and I were going to spend the rest of the night snorting coke and playing poker with hookers.”
She grinned. “Just put a movie on. The kids won’t even notice.”
“I guess my final answer really depends on one thing.”
“And what’s that?”
“Did Brian get the president’s approval for this?”
Annie flipped me off, and Brian called from the living room, “Congress gave us the unanimous vote, Lola! The United States government is in full support of our night out.”
“Well, thank God for that,” I teased. “I’m shocked they pushed this one through considering all of the pending approvals you guys are waiting on.”
“Yeah, Daddy, why hasn’t the president told us if we can get a puppy yet?” Emma questioned.
“Thanks a lot, smartass,” Annie muttered.
I laughed and finally dropped the whole “I don’t feel like watching your kids” act. “Fine. They can stay here tonight so you and Brian can get wild and crazy.”
She didn’t waste any time after that, grabbing her purse off the counter and shouting, “Let’s go, Brian!” He hopped up like a man who had finally gotten the approval to get laid after three years of nothing—so, basically, like himself.
I followed her toward the living room and watched as she hugged her kids good-bye, kissing them each on the forehead and saying, “I love you. Be good for Aunt Lola. If I find out you were an asshole, no iPad for a week.”
Her parenting tactics were on fleek.
“Please get them in bed by ten and call me if you need anything.” Her eyes distinctly belied her words—don’t call me unless they’re dead. “We’ll pick them up by nine tomorrow,” she instructed and pulled me into a tight hug.
I sighed when she released me. “I guess I’m going to have to call my dealer and cancel.”
“Don’t forget the hookers,” she added with a smile. “I hear you have to pay the full amount once they show up.”
“I thought it was hourly?”
Annie laughed. “All drug and hooker jokes aside, you’ve got some serious explaining to do tomorrow.”
I quirked an eyebrow.
She nodded toward the room where Reed was busy occupying her three menaces. “You know exactly what and whom I’m talking about.”
I rolled my eyes.
“I expect a full report in the morning. All the details.”
“I also expect a full report from you in the morning,” I countered.
She scoffed. “About what?”
“Like I don’t know you got all dressed up just to do your most favorite thing in the whole world.”
“Having dinner with my husband that is sans children saying ‘Mommy’ every ten seconds?”
“Nope.” I smirked.
“Is this the point in the conversation where you start talking about blow jobs and I leave?”
“Yep.”
“Okay, then. Have fun tonight. Thanks again.”
“You too and don’t forget—”
“Shut up, Lola!” she shouted before I could get another word in. She yanked Brian by the suit jacket into the hallway, and the door clicked shut a few seconds later.