Serenity Falls(99)

The past couple of days, I’ve been a nervous wreck, and have spent every second that I can with Wes. On Friday, at the end of camp bonfire/birthday party, we barely left each other’s side. Yesterday, we lounged around the house until it was time to go to the rodeo. When we returned home, he snuck into my room, and we talked about anything and everything. When we weren’t talking, we were making love. I didn’t want Mrs. Sandy or Mr. Will to wake up and find Wes in my room, but it was worth the risk because I realized that this would be the last time I’d be sleeping in his arms for a while, if ever again.

Now, reality is slapping me in the face like the bitch that she really is. I’ve been packing all day, preparing to return to school tomorrow. My stomach’s filled with dread and twisted in knots. Anxiety streams through my veins, knowing that Wes and I are still where we were a few weeks ago when I first tried to talk to him about what will happen when I return to school. But every time I bring it up, he finds a way to evade the seriousness of the situation. I’m not ready to leave, not by a long shot. When I left my dorm, I thought I was happy with the way my life was going. Then I arrived at the ranch, and met the man that turned my world upside down in the best possible way ever. I heave a deep sigh because I know that when I go back to campus, my life will no longer be the same. Just the thought alone makes me feel empty inside.

I last saw Wes this morning when he woke me by peppering small kisses all over my face, neck, collarbone, and the swells of my breasts. My body quivers with anticipation at the thought of how he touched every, last inch of my sensitized flesh and the huskiness of his voice as he whispered sweet nothings in my ear. Tears slowly obscure my vision when I think about how much I’ll miss him. I tried so hard to protect myself so I wouldn’t get hurt, but he worked his way in. And honestly, I couldn’t have stopped him even if I wanted to. The heart wants what it wants, and mine wants Wes. Inhaling a deep breath, I will myself not to burst into tears. When a knock sounds on my door, I quickly blink back the tears, and clear my throat. “Come in.”

The door cracks open. “Hey hon—” Mrs. Sandy stops, her eyes widening with concern when she sees me. “What’s wrong?” she asks, walking in and shutting the door behind her.

“I don’t wanna leave, Mrs. Sandy. I don’t want to leave Wes.” The dam bursts, and my tears break free. I can’t hold them back any longer.

“Shh… It’ll be okay,” she says softly in my ear as she envelopes me in a hug. With a tender touch, she strokes her hand up and down my back, attempting to soothe my sobs. “Have you two talked?”

I shake my head. “No. When I try to bring it up, he changes the subject. I don’t know what else to do.”

“Well, if I know my son at all, I know this. Your leaving is just as hard on him as it is for you.”

I take a shuddering breath. “Why won’t he just talk to me about it? I know there’s a way we can work it out.”

Mrs. Sandy removes her arms from around me only to cup my face in her hands. She lifts my tear stained face, and her sapphire blue eyes bore into mine. “All I can tell you is to try talking to him again. Okay?”

I nod while wiping my face clean of tears. “Yes, ma’am.”

“Good.” Smiling, she tilts my head down and kisses my forehead. “I’m gonna go, but if you need anything, I’m here for you.” She steps around me and pulls the door open.

I look at her over my shoulder. “Mrs. Sandy?”

“Hmm?”

“Thank you.”

“Anytime, dear. That’s what mothers are here for.” She walks out the door, leaving it ajar. Her words settle over me like a blanket, giving me warmth. Mother. In a sense, she’s right. She is Wes’ mother, and in some sort of way, she’s like one to me, too.

I turn back to the mess on my bed, heave a deep sigh, and continue to pack.

“Hey.” I hear Wes speak as I throw the last bit of clothes in my bag.

My head turns to see him standing in the doorway. “Hey.”

He must be able to tell from my solemn mood that something is off. “What’s wrong?” He steps inside my room, and his eyes flicker between my packed bags and me.

I sigh and plop down on the bed. “We really need to talk.”

He crouches down in front of me, taking my hands in his. As his thumbs caress the backs of my knuckles, he says softly, “And we will. But I really wanna show you something. Will you walk with me?”

Defeated. That’s what I feel right now, because he has just brushed the seriousness of our situation off again. I nod and stand from the bed. My head lifts when I feel Wes’ fingertips touch my chin. Leaning down, his lips barely brush over mine. “I love you. Everything will be fine. We will be fine.”