His grip is tight like a vice as he clutches me tighter to his chest. With his face buried in the crook of my neck, he mumbles, “You said that before. I just don’t understand how you could leave me like that.”
I pull back, cup his destroyed face in my hand, and force him to look at me. “I love you. I meant every word I said. I came here to apologize to you. Throwing all pride away, I came here to beg you to take me back. I let my wants get in the way of my heart. You, Wes, you are my heart… my home,” I whisper as I look into his eyes and search his face for any indication that he believes what I’m telling him. “These past two weeks have been hell for me. I know I have no one to blame but myself, and I take full responsibility for it. For what I’ve done to you. For what I’ve done to us. I only said no to your proposal because I’m in school, just turned twenty, and didn’t want you to think that a proposal was what I needed to keep me by your side.” I close my eyes for a moment and take a deep breath. “My mom once told me ‘home is wherever you want it to be. It is a place where you feel safe, loved, and cherished. It’s a place that makes you happy’. You are all of those things for me, Wes. You make me feel safe, loved, and cherished. Above all else, you make me so incredibly and unbelievably happy. I can find another school to finish my degree. I don’t care how young we are, and now, I’m the one who’s asking you. Will you marry me? I can’t live this life without you. I don’t want to live this life without you.” I hold my breath and wait. I’ve just poured out my heart and soul to him. For a long while, I sit here, straddling his thighs. Eventually, the expression behind his eyes turns from rage and hurt to longing, and maybe even understanding at my words.
“Kenleigh,” he says, clearing his throat. “I love you, too. More than you will ever know. And you will never know how sorry I am that I screamed at you the way I just did.” He sighs and rubs a hand over his hairless head. His hand lifts and brushes the hair out of my face. With that little bit of contact, my eyes close. “You are the sun to me. Every morning, you rise in the East and set in the West, but you are always there shining brightly. You have brought a sense of peace to me that I have never felt before. I want to be the foundation that holds you together when you feel as if your world is crumbling down around you. When life gets in the way, and things seem impossible, I want to be the one you lean on for support. I want my arms to be the ones that catch you when you think you might fail. I want my ears to know all your secrets, my lips to capture all your kisses, and my heart to hold all of your love.” With his lips against mine, he adds, “But with that said, I can’t let you ask me to marry you.”
“Why?” I try to pull back out of his grasp. Wes’ grip tightens as a slow grin graces his face. “Because, Baby, I’m still a man, and that’s my job.” Immediately, I relax against him as he chuckles.
I chuckle, too. “Shut up.” I wind my arms around his neck and crush my lips against his. I kiss him for all the unnecessary heartache that I’ve caused us both. I kiss him for our future that we will build together. “Ask me again?” I whisper against his lips.
Wes leans back and looks me directly in the eyes. “Marry me? Love me for the rest of my life, and let me do the same for you?”
“All right. Let’s do it,” I say around the lump in my throat, my voice thick with emotion.
“Yeah?”
I nod frantically, as my tears start to well up again, and a wide smile graces my face. “Absolutely. I love you, Wesley Adams.”
“And I love you, Kenleigh Briggs.” Effortlessly, he stands with me still straddled across his legs. I wrap mine around his waist as he carries me across the driveway, down the path leading to his front door, and into his house.
I was once told that to experience what something so great feels like, and to fully appreciate it and to feel deserving of it, you have to experience what it’s like to live without it, whatever it is. Without knowing first-hand what sadness feels like, how can one know what happiness truly is? Traumatic situations happen to all people, no matter what we believe. I had parents who loved me with all their hearts. Then, just like that, they were gone. For a long time, I was bitter. I look back now, and thank God every day for the amount of time that I had with them. They raised me for what little time we had together, and because of them, they taught me how to love with all my being. I’ve experienced the depths of sorrow and despair. And because of that, I’m able to experience, be grateful for, and feel deserving of the man I will one day marry. Until I met Wes, I walked this Earth happy, but not whole. He told me once that he was going to take me on the ride of my life. Truth-be-told, I’m ready for it. I can finally say that I can look into the future and not be scared that I will fall. Because I know that there’s a man who’s always ready to catch me.